The Secret
by AzOOAK
Summary: Alec is in a happy relationship with his boyfriend, Scott. But what happens when he stands face to face with a certain glitterfilled man at a party? Will he be able to resist this new temptation - or will he find himself in a world of secrets and unknown temptations? I suck at summaries. AU. Rated T to be safe. Please R
1. Chapter 1

"Morning, sweetheart."

Alec opened his eyes. He was tired. Wait, what time was it? He was never awake after 8 as per usual, but they had gone out the evening before. But how much later could it be?

He sat up in the bed, the black duvet falling down from his shoulders to his waist, now only hiding the lower half of his body. He yawned.

"What time is it?" he asked, looking at his boyfriend who was standing by the window, opening the white cutains.

"12:30. I was going to wake you up at the normal time, but you were so sweet while you were sleeping, I just couldn't."

Alec was suddenly wide awake. "12:30? You can't be serious!" He reached for his cellphone lying next to the bed, checking the time. 12:30. Damn. How did he manage to sleep for so long? "I'm going to be late!" He looked at his boyfriend in horror when he realised he was supposed to be at work an hour and a half ago.

"You were supposed to work today? Baby, you do realise it's thursday, right?"

Alec's shoulders sank and he blushed. He hadn't realised it was thursday, no. He only worked sunday, monday, tuesday and wednesday, so he actually _didn't_ have to be at work.

"Oh thank God," was all he could say as he fell back into the pile of pillows behind him. He then looked up at his boyfriend. "Wait, how long have you been up?"

"Oh, just for a couple hours. I thought I'd let you sleep, though. You haven't been able to get much sleep lately, so I figured you needed it."

Alec smiled at how considerate his boyfriend was. He was always like that, and he always kept updated with Alec's appointments, so he was sure he didn't plan anything that wouldn't work and Alec wouldn't miss anything.

"Thanks."

* * *

"Are you ready, Alec?"

"Almost, give me a couple of minutes," he shouted from the bathroom. He fixed his hair one more time, hating that he had to, but knowing he'd have to do that for his boyfriend. It was an important night for him.

"Hurry up, sweetheart, we have to leave." His boyfriend showed up in the door to the bathroom, looking at Alec from head to toe. He smiled. "You look beautiful."

Alec blushed and smiled at him. "Thanks. So, where are we actually going?"

"It's this party-thing just outside the city. It's held at my boss' place, so behave."

Alec smiled. "I wouldn't dream of behaving when it's about your career dear, you know I have to screw it up. All for you."

He led Alec out of the apartment, locking the door behind them. "You better not," he said and grinned at Alec. "The taxi's waiting at the frontdoor."

Alec nodded and started walking down the stairs. Just as he had said, the taxi was waiting just outside the front door, and he got in. Not a minute later, his boyfriend slid into the seat next to him, buckling his seatbelt. He gave the driver the adress and settled into the seat, as they'd have to drive for about 20 minutes.

"Thank you for doing this for me. I know how much you hate parties. I love you, babe."

Alec smiled at him, he too settling into the seat. "I love you too, Scott."

* * *

**AN: So this is my first attempt at a multichaptered story. The first chapter wasn't really good, but it was just to get it started. The story will improve as it unravels, I promise!**

**Reviews are greatly appreciated. **

**P.S. I'll be on vacation for the next week, so it'll be updated when I get home. **

**I hope you liked it, even though it was very short! **


	2. Chapter 2

Scott got out of the cab after paying the cab-driver and Alec followed him. They were now standing in front of a huge house, almost mansion-like. It was built in Victorian style, although with some newer touches too. It was one of those huge mansions with a driveway in a half-circle, leading up to the front door and back down. In the middle a huge fountain was standing in all it's glory with a weeping angel.

"Wauw," Alec whispered, looking at the house. Scott smiled at him and took his hand, leading him to the front door. He rung the doorbell and they waited for the door to be opened, so they could enter.

"Scott! I'm so glad you could be here!"

The voice came from a short man in jeans and a button-up. His hair was gray in the sides and was starting to go gray on his head too. Alec had only met him once before, but he knew it was Scott's boss.

"Alec, isn't it? It's nice to see you again."

They entered and looked around in the big hall. There were people standing along the walls, and a few people at the buffet in the middle of the room. At the buffet there were all kinds of foods and desserts. There was a bar in the corner of the room, obviously temporary.

"Scott! Over here!"

Alec had to admit he was jealous of the people Scott worked with. They got to spend so much time with him every day. Yes, Scott was _his_ boyfriend, and no, he wasn't going to cheat on Alec, and yes, Alec got to spend more time with him than they did. But he just couldn't help himselv. He pushed the thoughts away as they walked over to the two guys that had been calling Scott.

The younger one of the two, but not by much, was a blond man with brown eyes. He was wearing a sweater and a pair of jeans, while the other, older, one, was wearing a blue suit and had red hair and blue eyes. The younger one was pale, but not as pale as Alec's ivoryskin, while the older one was slightly tanned.

* * *

They were friendly enough, but Alec got bored soon. They were pretty much only talking about work, a field where Alec had no idea what was going on. "I'm gonna go and grab something to eat, okay?" he said, smiling at Scott and then making his way to the buffet. He didn't know if he actually wanted anything, but it was a couples minutes away from the conversation over there, so at first he just stood there and looked at the food, trying to figure out what to eat.

"The hotdogs are good."

Alec nearly jumped ten feet when he heard the smooth voice behind him. He spun around and came face to face with one of the most beautiful men he'd ever met in his life. Said man grinned at him, trying hard not to laugh. Alec immediatly turned the colour of a tomato.

"Thanks, but I don't eat junk food," Alec muttered under his breath, trying not to stare at the man before him. His black hair had silver streaks in it and was spiked up in a halo around his head. His lips was coated in, what possible could be, a strawberry lipgloss. He was wearing eyeliner and the eyelids was coated with a glittery blue eyeshadow. He was wearing black skinny jeans and a purple button-up. His skin was a beautiful olive tan.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," the man said, the grin still in place, and Alec didn't think he was sorry at all. "Magnus Bane." He held out his hand for Alec to take, and he did so, letting go almost instantly.

"That's.. fine. I'm Alec Lightwood." Alec mentally smacked himself on the head. Why was he so stupid? He'd met new people before. Why was this guy so different? "It's a strange name, isn't it? Magnus Bane?" he asked and rewarded himself with yet another mental smack in the face.

Magnus shrugged his shoulders, the grin widening. "Alec? Is that short for anything?"

"Alexander. But only my parents call me that."

"Don't you like it when people call you Alexander?"

Alec shook his head a little bit before replying. "Not really. I like Alec better. Always have."

"Why? Alexander is a sexy name," Magnus said and Alec's blush, that had nearly been gone returned full-on. Magnus smiled. "That blush is adorable."

Alec couldn't help but to smile a little bit. Why was this Magnus guy so easy to talk to? It was so out of character for Alec. He was usually so shy.

"I better get back to Scott," he said, not sure if he wanted what this guy was doing to him. Magnus nodded, smiled, and Alec went back to Scott and the two boring guys he was talking to.

"Hey," he said and Scott gave him a quick kiss.

"Hey babe."

Alec then realised that he would much rather have stayed with Magnus for a couple minutes.

* * *

**AN: Okay, so you got another short one before I leave for my holiday. Please review, please! I wanted to bring in Magnus early in the story, so here he is! But seriously, no more till I get back from my holiday! **

**I'm sorry it got so short. I know it kind of sucked, but I wanted to bring in Magnus. Review and let me know what you think! **


	3. Chapter 3

After talking to the two of them for about an hour, Alec was getting tired. Alec had yet to actually participate in the conversation, he hadn't yet said more than a few words, and even those were only agreeing or disagreeing with the others or Scott.

"You alright, Alec?"

Scott's voice cut through to Alec, forcing his out of his trail of thoughts, which had again been leading back to that man he had met earlier on the evening, Magnus. His eyes had been searching the room looking for him every now and then during the last hour or so, but Magnus was nowhere to be seen - he had probably wandered off soon after Alec had returned to Scott. He looked at Scott and faked a smile.

"What? Oh, no, uh, yeah, I'm just tired."

"You sure that's it?"

Alec knew Scott was just being the worried boyfriend he'd always be, but he couldn't help but feeling like Scott was accusing him of something. He knew it was stupid, Scott was just being Scott. Besides, what would he be accusing him of?

"Sure, what else would it be?" Alec managed to say in a somewhat normal tone of voice, without sounding _too_ suspicious.

Scott shrugged his shoulders, looking closely at him. "Maybe we should be heading home soon if you're tired."

"If you wanna stay for a while that's cool. I can wait for a couple hours."

"You sure?"

"I'm sure, Scott. I'm fine. I can wait," Alec tried to reassure him, but at the seems of Scott's face, and Alec's previous feelings of him accusing him of something, Scott wasn't happy with the answer. In fact, he seemed to be anything but. "You sure _you_ are alright? You seem so.. worried."

Scott flashed a hurt look in his eyes, but quickly turned it into a bright - but fake - smile. "Yeah, I'm perfectly fine. Just wouldn't want you to be bored."

Alec wanted to shout that he was bored as hell, and all he wanted to do was run out the door and never see those people again. Just leave all of them behind, because he couldn't stand any of them, and he couldn't bring himself to care about a single one of them besides Scott. But that wouldn't be a good idea - mainly because at that exact moment a tall man stepped through the door, immediatly catching Alec's eyes, probably without even being aware of it.

"Oh, I'm not bored at all, Scott. Don't worry."

* * *

Turns out, he would come to regret that sentence for the next fifteen minutes. That's how long it took Alec to almost stand and yawn from the boredom. He was sneeking glances at Magnus every now and then, still trying to keep up with the conversation of the now 4 people standing in front of him and his boyfriend. Two women, a little older than Alec and Scott had decided to join them. They were both blonde with blue eyes, and basically looked the same. They could've been sisters, as far as Alec knew.

From one second to another, Magnus stood beside Alec. He looked directly at Scott, but Alec didn't notice where he was looking. He was startled half to death and tried not to scream, when Magnus litterally snuck up on him.

"I'm terribly sorry, Scott, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to steal away your boyfriend for a short period of time. Alexander, will you join me?"

Alec looked straight at him when he used his first name. He'd already told him he didn't like being called Alexander. Then again, he _had _said that he thought Alexander was a sexy name... Alec blushed and nodded at Magnus.

Magnus started walking over to the drinks table and Alec quickly followed. "Get yourself a drink and we'll go outside, Alexander. You look like you need it."

Alec looked at the drinks standing on the table, already prepared, and bottles standing behind them if anyone needed refills - which had already happened quite a few times, judging on the amount of empty or half-full bottles standing to the side of the table. He admitted it to himself, he wanted to drink. He did need it, like Magnus had said, after talking to those guys for such a long time. But he had promised himself not to drink. So he wouldn't.

"I don't really drink."

Magnus looked at him like he just told him he had a third ear on his stomach. What kind of reference was that, anyway?

"You must be joking. You don't drink and you don't eat junkfood. No wonder how you stay that cute. I don't understand how you live, though."

Alec couldn't help but smile, and looked at Magnus puzzled face. "It's not really that tough, if you've never been that much into it in the first place."

Magnus stood there, looking at him with a blank expression on his face, and Alec smiled nervously at him, the blush of course creeping up on his cheeks. "Does it really matter?" Alec asked, wanting to just get it over with and go outside and get some fresh air.

"No. I suppose it doesn't. Just grab something to drink, and we'll head outside."

Magnus took a glass of wine and Alec just took a can of coca cola. Magnus shook his head slowly at him, but didn't say anything. Magnus started walking again, towards the stairs leading to the first floor. Alec guessed there was a balcony or something upstairs. They didn't say a word on the way upstairs, but it wasn't exactly uncomfortable. As Alec had thought, there was a balcony upstairs. Magnus walked out, moving to standing by the bannister. Alec stood beside him, opening his coke and taking a sip. As the cool liquid slid down his throat, he felt himself relax a bit.

"Thanks. I needed some air."

"That much was obvious. Besides, you were caught with Phillip and Carl. They'd never let you get away if you didn't have an excuse. And it was pretty obvious you were bored half to death. So I thought I'd give you one."

Alec smiled at him. He didn't know what to say, and again they were left in a comfortable silence.

"How long have you and Scott been together?"

Alec had been looking out over the forest, submerged into his own thoughts and he nearly choked on - air. He was surprised by Magnus' question, even if he didn't really know why. It wasn't a weird question.

"Oh, uhm. 14 months, almost 15 months. You seeing anyone?"

"No, not at the moment."

Alec was yet again surprise by Magnus. Why wasn't he dating anyone? With that look he could probably get most guys he wanted, if not every single one.

"Why not?"

Magnus shrugged his shoulders. "I guess no one caught my eye so far." He was smiling at Alec and looked him straight in the eyes. Alec smiled back. He couldn't help it. Magnus was a nice guy, or he seemed to be.

"So, Alexander. You don't drink, you don't eat junkfood, and you're dating Scott. That's what I know about you. So tell me something about you."

"Well, uh.. I don't know what you want to know. Well, I work in this little bookstore called _Graymark Books_. I have a brother, Jace, and a sister, Isabelle. I don't know if you know where Scott lives, but I live just down the street from there."

Magnus nodded, slowly, enjoying the view and not looking at Alec.

"Tell me about you. I know even less about you."

Magnus nodded, but didn't look at him. "I live pretty much in the middle of town, but I doubt you've ever been there before. I work on a fashion magazine, and I'm here with one of my friends, who didn't want to go alone, and I've gone to plenty of these things with him. I am one of the few people who can wear sparkles, and still look wonderful. I'm an only child."

They were both quiet for a couple of minutes, until Magnus said something.

"I've always wanted to have a brother or sister."

"Really? Why? I can never catch a break. Even moving out from home hasn't given me some peace."

Magnus shrugged his shoulders, smiling and finally looking at Alec. "I guess it'd be fun when you were a kid. Having someone else to play with all the time."

"Or to pick on you constantly," Alec said, and realized too late he'd said it out loud. He didn't mean to tell Magnus that. "Sorry, I didn't mean to say that."

"They picked on you?"

Alec took a sip of his coke, trying to relax himself. "I should go back to Scott.."

"Don't be silly, he's fine. Did your brother and sister pick on you?"

"No, I really should go.." Alec made his way back to the door, but before he got any longer, he felt a hand around his arm. He looked back and saw Magnus standing right behind him.

"Hey, don't go."

Alec wanted to stay, he'd had a great time talking to Magnus, and he didn't want to go back to Scott and the others. But the shy guy he was, was getting the best of him, and he was getting nervous.

"Sorry."

Alec made his way back to Scott and the others, leaving Magnus to stand alone on the balcony.

* * *

Alec and Scott walked into Scott's apartment a couple hours later, and Alec was getting worried. Scott hadn't said a word the entire cab drive home, and he had asked if Alec slept over at his place, or at his own place. Normally he just assumed Alec was stayed at his place for the night, if Alec hadn't said anything.

"Are you alright, Scott?"

Scott was sitting in the black couch in the livingroom. It was obvious he was trying to stay calm. He looked at Alec, who was walking into the livingroom and looking at him.

"Why wouldn't I be, Alec?"

Alec sighed. "You don't seem to be alright. You seem sad. Or worried. Or mad at me.. I don't know, I can't figure it out. Did I do something?"

"What were you doing with Magnus Bane?" Scott asked and looked at the coffeetable in front of him, where Alec had now placed a glass of water. Alec sat down in the chair on the opposite side of the coffeetable.

"What do you mean? We were talking."

Alec couldn't quite figure him out at that moment. Scott was normally never one to hold back his feelings, good or bad, at home or public. And Alec hadn't seen any kind of problem.

"He has a reputation, you know. He doesn't care if someone's taken. And he seemed very fond of you."

"We were just talking, Scott. What are you accusing me of? I would never cheat on you, I hope you know that. Don't you trust me?"

"Alec, I trust you. I just don't trust him."

And with those words Scott got up and went to bed, letting Alec sit alone in the livingroom. Alec almost immediatly teared up, and he didn't know how long he could keep the tears in. So for now he got up, out of the apartment, locked the door behind him, and went home to cry. Home, where he hadn't been for days, because he was at his boyfriend's place. The boyfriend he loved so much, but didn't know how to show it.

The boyfriend who was now accusing him of cheating.

* * *

**AN: I'm hooome! Great vacation. Did you miss me? Of course you did. **

**Anyway, this chapter is not perfect - not at all - but I really wanted to update today, and it's alright. At least it's longer than the other chapters, and I'm thinking I want the rest of the chapters to be about this length, too. Is that alright with you guys? **

**Anyway, I was really happy about the reviews I've gotten so far, but for the last chapter I didn't really get any. Reviews are love, guys! **

**And, it makes me write faster and gives me motivation, sometimes it could even give me ideas on what to do later in the story. So please, please, pleeeaaaaseeee, review. I love my reviews. **

**I hope you liked it, guys. **


	4. Chapter 4

When Alec woke up the next day, he had a few moments of peaceful bliss - but of course he had to remember what had happened the night before. It had been days since he had been home, and he doubted he actually had anything to eat, but decided to check the kitchen before spending money on food. It was just as he had thought - the apartment was completely void of any food he could actually have for breakfast. He had put on some clothes as he got out of bed. The first pair of black jeans and the first t-shirt he found in his closet. He never checked the mirror. He knew that his hair was just like it always was, and he had learned to live with that. He never used make-up anyway, so why use any now?

He decided to have breakfast at a nearby café. It was only two blocks away, so he could easily walk there. He sat down in one of the steel chairs outside when he had ordered his food - scrambled eggs, toast and bacon and a black cup of coffee - and started reading a newspaper he had found inside. He did like the fresh air in the morning, and it was a great little café, but it was a little too expensive, so he never went there.

"So you do eat."

He nearly jumped a feet from his chair and spilled his coffee and he quickly looked in the direction the voice came from. It was hard for him not to smile when he saw him, but he couldn't let himself. Not after what happened between him and Scott the evening before.

"Magnus ... You live around here?"

Alec faintly remembered Magnus telling him he lived in the middle of town, which couldn't be too far away from here. Magnus lit up in a grin and decided to sit on the chair opposite of Alec.

"Do you jump everytime people talk to you? I don't think I've spoken to you a single time where you didn't jump like that."

"Uh.. No.. Sorry. I just didn't expect you to see you here."

"What? You're not happy to see me?"

Magnus acted insulted, but it was obvious he was trying hard not to laugh. Alec couldn't force his smile back for much longer, so he decided to finish his coffee quickly. He didn't want to admit to Magnus how cute he actually was, when he was being childish like that.

"I kind of have to go.."

"Oh, no you don't. You left me out on the balcony last night. What was that about anyway?"

Alec sunk back into his seat, trying hard to not sigh. He knew this was gonna be brought up. He expected it to be.

"You know, your eyes are all red," Magnus said, looking closer at him. Alec looked down on the newspaper laying in his lap, trying to hide his eyes behind his bangs - but for the first time in years his bangs decided not to fall down in his face. Stupid hair.

"Are you okay, Alexander?"

"Alec. Please call me Alec."

Magnus looked at him, surprised at the change of topic, but got the point that Alec wasn't going to talk to him about it.

"But Alexander sounds so-"

"_You_ think it sounds sexy. But whenever _I_ hear it, I'm afraid I'm gonna get yelled at."

Magnus sighed, but smiled at him, and shook his head slowly. "Sorry, either I call you Alexander or I can't talk to you. I mean, don't you here it? Alexander is _so_ sexy. Crying out Alexander in bed would be so _perfect_."

Alec blinked twice fast. He had to admit that the way Magnus said his name was.. sexy. He looked away and without looking at his own reflection knew, that his face was a dark, crimson red. He hated his blush. How could Magnus manage to say his name so goddamn special, making him want to just jump over the table and kiss him?

Alec realised in horror what he had just been thinking about and looked everywhere else but at Magnus. He had a boyfriend, and he wouldn't cheat on him. No matter what he thought.

"So, Alexander," - Magnus drawed out his name - "Why aren't you here with Scott?"

Alec started biting nervously in his bottom lip. He couldn't help but notice Magnus' eyes darting to his lips.

"That doesn't matter."

Magnus' eyes went back to Alecs after staring at his lips for a couple second, and those green eyes wouldn't leave Alec's soul alone at that moment. Or at least that's what Alec felt like.

"Did you fight?"

Alec shrugged his shoulders half-heartedly and tried avoiding those green eyes. He wasn't going to answer him, not with an actual answer. He wasn't supposed to know about his and Scott's private life. So he got up, turned around and was going to leave, when he was stopped by and hand on his shoulder.

Magnus turned him around so he was facing him, and he leaned in to kiss him.

A million things went through Alec's mind in that second. What about Scott? What would happen if he found out? Was Alec going to tell him? Was Magnus going to? But what was the chances of Scott finding out? How were they going to hide it? What excuses could he use to go out with Magnus? What if anyone he knew saw them?

But he found himself not caring about Scott just then, and his lips collided with Magnus' and they, first gently, started moving together, soon more rough. Magnus' hand was still on his shoulder, the other one on Alec's side. Alec's hand was on Magnus' arm, the other one hanging down his side.

Alec tried not to moan out loud as Magnus softly bit his bottom lip, and Magnus used that moment to slip his tongue into Alec's mouth. For every kiss, Alec got a little more lightheaded, and he was brought back to reality, when he realized he needed air. He placed one of his hands on Magnus' chest, softly pushing him away.

They stared at each other for a long time after that. They both knew what it meant.

"I don't want to cheat on him," Alec whispered, almost tearing up. Magnus' hand brushed a little hair away from his face. He nodded slowly, keeping eyecontact with Alec through the tears. "I don't want to be like that, Magnus."

"I'm afraid the only alternative is breaking up with him."

Alec was again biting on his bottom lip, anything but happy about the decision he had just made. He felt like going home and crying once again, but this time he couldn't run away. Not from Magnus.

They sat down in the chairs again while Alec was trying to calm himself. Magnus tried to calm him.

But Alec wasn't able to relax, not then, not there, and not with him. He just couldn't.

* * *

When Alec walked into Magnus apartment, he still wasn't calm. He tried sitting in the pink fur couch - which he barely noticed. He tried drinking some water. He even tried just sitting with Magnus for a little time, watching TV, thinking about anything but what a horrible person he was.

That was when Magnus got a great idea.

"Why don't you try drinking a little bit? It usually relaxes you, and it doesn't have to be a lot. Just one drink."

Alec agreed after a couple of restless minutes, and Magnus got him some kind of drink that basically looked like coke, only a little brighter in the colour. He drank it slowly and felt himself starting to relax.

When he kissed Magnus, Magnus had been laying on the couch next to him, watching some movie Alec hadn't seen before. He had been surprised, but nonetheless kissed him back, and soon none of them had a clue what was happening around them. Time seemed to stand still, as they laid on the couch together.

When the sun started to set outside the windows, removing the small amounts of light in an already dark apartment, Alec decided it was time to go home. He had kissed Magnus goodbye and continued walking out of the apartment, after telling Magnus he didn't need to drive him home - he could walk just fine and he needed the fresh air.

Only, when he got home, he felt a presence in the small apartment. He was sure he wasn't alone, and when he walked into the livingroom, someone was sitting in the chair facing the door he just entered through. He felt his heart drop.

"Hey Scott."

* * *

**AN: Okaaaay.. So this chapter sucked. Sorry about that. **

**It's short. Ish. Sorry. **

**It was poorly written. Sorry. **

**There wasn't enough details in most of it, and in the rest there was too many. Sorry. **

**So yes, it sucked. Sorry. Okay, I'll stop saying sorry.. **

**I tried rewriting this about a hundred times, because this chapter needed to be there, but this is the best - and longest - it got. I hope you don't hate it too much, but with this - really bad - chapter comes a new idea! **

**So I was thinking.. What would you guys think about if I started writing my chapters from a single word or sentence? I was thinking that you guys could review the latest chapter and write a new word or sentence for the next chapter. Then I'll choose from the few words I get, or just write them down and pick one at random. And then the word I chose for the chapter will be the chapter title. I was just thinking that maybe some of the things I write about are too obvious and not challenging - so you guys can help me with that! **

**So what do you guys think of the idea? Review and give me your opinion! And if you think it's a good idea, put a word or sentence in the review. Not too long, though. **

**Thanks for all the reviews I got on the last chapters, I really love you guys! ... This AN are turning out to be as long as the story, omg. Sorry. Wait-no-sorry ... crap. I was gonna stop saying sorry. **

**Okay, I'm just gonna go now, 'cause I'm rambling. Hope it wasn't too shitty. **


	5. Chapter 5

Alec wasn't ready for this conversation. Not at all. He didn't want to talk to Scott. He didn't want to _see_ Scott. And most of all, he did not want to explain to Scott. Perhaps he should just not say anything. At least for a while.

"Can we talk about last night?"

Of course that's why he was there. Why else would he be? Alec instantly began biting his bottom lip.

"I don't know, I'm just -"

"Alec, please. Can we _please_ talk about last night?"

Alec shifted his weight from foot to foot and somehow ended up on the couch. He nodded softly, knowing that he'd probably end up telling Scott that he had been with Magnus all day. He still felt a little lightheaded from the alcohol, Magnus had given him. One had turned to two. Two had turned to three.

"I just wanted to tell you that I'm really sorry. I should've trusted you, I know that, and I do trust you. It just wouldn't have been the first boyfriend he's stolen from me, and I don't know if I could stand watching that again. He's got no respect for relationships, Alec. I'm really sorry."

Alec wasn't looking at him. He was hiding his face in his hands, because the last thing he could do was look at the boyfriend he actually cheated on. Many people didn't think so, but Alec himself considered kissing someone else cheating. He had told himself he would never do that. He had _promised_ himself he wouldn't do that. If Scott ever found out, what was he going to say? What would Scott think of him? He would hate him, Alec was sure of that.

"It's okay, Scott."

Alec nearly whispered the three words, and for a moment he didn't think Scott had heard him. But then he spoke.

"You sound strange, Alec. Look at me."

Alec hesitantly looked up at him. Looked him in the eyes. He could feel Scott's eyes digging into his soul, and he hated himself at that moment. How could he not?

"Have you been drinking?"

Alec stared surprised at him for a few moments, before nodding slowly - still shocked.

"Did I hurt you that bad? Oh God, Alexander, I'm so sorry-"

"_Call me Alec_. You know I hate Alexander. And I already told you it's okay, don't worry about it."

Scott looked him in the eyes, and it wasn't 'till then he realized that Scott's eyes was as red as his own must have been that morning. He had been crying. Quite recently, too.

"Do you want me to leave?"

"What?"

"You hissed at me. You never do that."

Alec bit his bottom lip again, without noticing himself.

"I didn't mean to, but yes, I think I'd like some time on my own. I can't figure it out - _us_. I just need a little time, okay?"

Scott looked hurt for a second, but he forced himself to smile, even if it was half-heartedly. Then he nodded.

"Okay, Alexa- Alec. Just call me, anytime."

Then he got up and exited the apartment without leaving Alec a moment to answer him. It hadn't been a question though, so Alec didn't mind. He hated acting in front of Scott, he hated it. He hated himself. And most of all, he hated Magnus. Why did he have to come into his life? Everything was going so well. He and Scott was happy.

But Magnus _did_ enter Alec's life, even if it had been a coincidence.

* * *

"Do you go here every morning?"

Magnus was again sitting across from Alec, but Alec hadn't noticed him sitting down. Once again Alec almost jumped, but actually forced himself to stay in the chair. He tried looking calm, but knew his face was slowly turning a crimson red. He didn't look at Magnus.

"I'd rather be left alone, mr. Bane."

When Magnus spoke again, Alec could hear the hurt in his voice. But right now, he wanted Magnus out of his life. It wasn't fair, blaming him for everything, when a lot of it was his own fault. He could've said no, but he didn't. If he had, Magnus would've kept trying, but after a while his interest would fade, and he would leave Alec alone.

"I thought we were on first names, _Alexander_. You usually call me Magnus."

"Nothing is ... _usual_ between us. We've known each other for three days, and for now I'm not very fond of continuing this ... friendship."

Alec wanted to say something more, but he felt his voice starting to shake lightly, so he left it at that. He hoped Magnus hadn't caught onto that, though.

"I thought you were going straight to bed when you left my place last night. What happened?"

Alec, even he had a new found weakness for this glittercovered man, found himself getting mad at him. Had he not, just moments ago, told him to leave him alone, and that he didn't want to continue their friendship?

"I told you to leave it alone. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back home. I want to enjoy my last day before going back to work, and I want to be at _home_, and definitely not with you."

There it was. It was out. The lie he hadn't wanted to tell. He got up, and started walking away, towards his apartment, leaving a shocked Magnus behind him. But as soon as he had walked a few steps down the street, a hesitating hand grapped his wrist. How could he think it would be that easy to walk away from Magnus?

He turned around to look Magnus in the eyes, but he found that those eyes were burning red, as if holding in warm, burning tears. He wanted to stand his ground, but in that moment, his world was in pain. He had never been one to inflict pain on others, not at all. But in that moment Magnus was standing in front of him, close to tears, but Alec had to stand his ground. He had to.

"You didn't mean that, did you, Alexander?"

That smooth voice. Those eyes, begging him to tell the truth.

"I'm afraid I did, mr. Bane. And to you, I am mr. Lightwood - since you're not fond of Alec."

And then he walked away, away from that beautiful man, he wanted to walk away from everything for. He wanted to walk away from Scott. But he wasn't like that, and he was never going to be.

But that didn't change the pain from a shattering heart.

* * *

Alec had just entered his apartment, the only thing he wanted to do was just go to bed, find a good book, and forget about all of his own problems. People wondered why Alec liked reading so much, but he had never told them why, either. He had had a hard life, everyone knew that.

He had been bullied his entire life for being different from the other kids, and when he, at the age of 13, had found himself attracted to a person of his own gender, he knew why he would always be different.

He hadn't had a good life at home, either. He lost his younger brother Max, when he was 15, Max only being 8 at the time. Just thinking about it made Alec tear up, and he hadn't even told Scott about it. How could he? Scott would judge him, like he judged himself. It was his own fault that Max had died, and how was he supposed to forgive himself for that?

When he came out to his parents, they had not been.. accepting, to tone it quite a lot down. They had been acting around him ever since, never showing real emotion. Sometimes Alec couldn't help but think that the fact, that he was attracted to guys, and not girls as his brother was, meant that his parents no longer loved him, but he always shoved the thought away. Because ... Parents always loved their kids, no matter how much of a disappointment they were, didn't they? And Alec knew that was what he was to them - a disappointment and embarrassment.

His sister was the only one who approved of him. His brother wasn't happy about it, but he was trying - and Alec appreciated that a lot, considering his parents had just thrown him out and cut all contact to him. It had been hard, but he had stayed at his friend's place until he found a job and an apartment. So it had worked out for him.

And then he met Scott. His life was hell when he met him, but soon everything turned brighter. It didn't take long for him to fall in love, but that wasn't new to him. He always fell too quickly and got his heart broken all over again. He was never going to make the first move. No one had ever been in love with him. So why would this new guy, this cute and funny and amazing guy, Scott, fall for him? Scott had started flirting with him, but Alec was never going to see. He didn't even know Scott was gay. It wasn't until Scott told him he liked him, that Alec knew.

Scott had been Alec's first boyfriend, all his first belonged to Scott. And they were happy together. Until Magnus came into Alec's life and ruined everything.

But that was exactly what he didn't want to think about. All of this was why he loved reading - he could escape the reality. Live in someone else's world for just a short period of time. He could be someone else, not held back by his own flaws, like his shyness. He wanted to be out there, talking to people and getting all the experiences he should have, but he was afraid to do so. He was too shy, and he knew everything could go wrong. Like drinking - he wouldn't have control over his own body if he drank just a little bit too much, and he wouldn't know what he was doing.

So for now he'd grab a hold of the first book he saw - he never read the title or the author, just opened it and started reading - and go to bed. Try to forget about life for a while.

While everyone was out there doing all the things he so badly wanted to be able to do.

* * *

As Alec left him on his own, he felt more broken than he throught he would. Truth be told, he had thought Alec would leave that dumbass, Scott, for Magnus. He had expected him to. So why didn't he?

He was much more beautiful and had a sense of fashion. He was funnier than Scott. He was much better in bed than Scott was - as he had been told by one of his ex-boyfriends who had been with Scott before him - not that Alec would know that, though.

He may have expected Alec to walk away from Scott for him, but he had been planning to do the same thing he did to every boyfriend he had. He had fun with them for a couple of weeks until they started getting boring, and just ... were there. Were expected to be there, always were. He wanted a boyfriend he could be surprised of, he wanted to hear them tell him about how much they adored him and why. But soon that got boring when they didn't change the words every once in a while, and Magnus got bored and ended things. So why did this hurt so much?

Magnus had tried getting rejected before, of course, but never quite this way. No one had had a taste of him and then said no. No one was able to. When you got a taste of the Magnificent Magnus, you were nowhere near even thinking about turning down the offer. Like Alec had just done.

Maybe Magnus had acted different around Alec, though. Just a glance into those cerulean blue eyes took his breath away. And kissing those soft lips, he would never be able to turn that down. Had Alec not enjoyed their day together as much as Magnus thought he had?

No matter what was happening, Magnus was nowhere near happy about the result. He felt broken down, something that rarely happened. But something about this Alec was different than everyone else. Something drove Magnus to a state of crazy he didn't know existed. He wanted nothing but to wrap his arms around the blue eyes angel and hold him when he cry, support him when he need it, and do everything possible to show how much he cared about him.

But did he really care all that much, or was merely he telling himself lies he wanted to believe? He wanted to ask the question, but he was afraid of the answer. Had he changed, or was he still the Magnificent Magnus Bane he had been a week earlier?

Now _that_ was a question he wasn't ready to ask - not at all.

* * *

**AN: Heeeey guuuuuuys. Sorry it took so long for me to update. I actually feel ... alright with this chapter. The longest one yet, isn't it? **

**Anyway, some of the things I wrote about Alec's life being hard and boohoo, you're gonna hear more about it - but only some of it. **

**I'm afraid the last part may not be very good, but that's because I'm ... pretty much sleeping. I am so goddamn tired, but I wanted this chapter up for you guys tonight. But what do you think about how I wrote some of it from Magnus' perspective as well? I actually like the idea - right now, I might not like it in the morning - getting some of his feelings into everything. **

DeadlyRainbowSprinkles:** I know it's moving fast, and yes, it is intended. I hope it will make sense later, but I don't know if it's just me thinking that it has to be like that - considering what happens later on in the story. I haven't actually gotten any chapters written down right now, I litterally just finished this. But I've got some things planned out for later, I just need to get them.. written down. **

**Also, the wait... As I said, I'm really sorry, but it has an explanation! I started school wednesday! *YAY* And our teachers have already given us a bunch of homework. I have homework for three subjects out of for on monday, so yeah. It's probably gonna be weekend updates most of them, I hope you don't mind. **

**But yeah, review and tell me what you think! I litterally have the biggest grin on my face everytime I get an email sayin [New Review] for The Secret. Thank you so much! I care way more about it than I probably should. **

**I hope you liked it! **


	6. Chapter 6

Alec took his phone from the side of the bed. It had been ringing for the past 10 minutes, and he couldn't ignore it anymore, even if what he wanted to do the most was just throw it out the window, and forget about the world.

"Hello?"

His voice was low and sounded wrong. He sounded like he hadn't spoken for years. He cleared his throat and repeated himself. "Hello?"

"My mom wants to know if we're coming to dinner on monday."

"Scott..."

"I know, _you_ were supposed to call _me_. And I know, it's only been one day, and you haven't gotten any space from me since yesterday. But my mom wants to know if it's for sure we're coming over, and I didn't know what to tell her since our ..."

He didn't want to say the word fight. Alec knew that already, he hated that word, because it made him feel like they were over. It wasn't their first fight at all, but Scott always assumed the worst. He didn't feel like he was good enough for Alec. And Alec didn't understand that. Alec was no where near good enough for him.

"I don't know if it's a good idea, Scott."

"So we're not going to my mom's place for dinner on monday?"

Scott sounded so desperate. So close to tears.

"I don't think so."

Alec wanted to punch himself in the face. He didn't want to hurt Scott. He had already hurt Magnus.

"I love you, Alec, please know that. I always will love you."

The next words Alec said was no more than a wisper, and he was never sure if Scott had heard them.

"I know, Scott. I love you too."

And then he hung up.

* * *

For the rest of the week, Alec was left alone. He didn't leave his apartment, not even to get breakfast. He only left his apartment to go to work. Other than that, he just stayed at home, reading and writing. He had been writing a book over the past few months, but now he had a hard time writing it. He didn't know where it was supposed to go or how to get there.

Most of the time he slept. He barely could sleep. He had never been one to sleep for long, and it wasn't easier for him now. He had a lot to think about, and spending the entire day home, he was sleeping a lot more than usual.

He hadn't talked to Scott all week, either. And he avoided Magnus the best he could. He didn't know where Magnus had gotten his number from, but he had called him a couple times. He answered it the first time, and as soon as he heard it was Magnus, he hang up. Then he saved the number so he knew when Magnus called, and he hadn't answered it since then. But when Magnus called him again, he decided it needed to stop. He didn't have the heart to do this.

"What is it, Magnus?"

"I didn't think you were going to answer the phone. You usually don't."

"You don't know what I usually do."

He could hear a sigh from the other end of the line, and he couldn't help getting a little bit annoyed.

"I've tried calling you for a week."

"I know that, Magnus. What do you want?"

Another sigh.

"Can't we just talk a little bit? I miss you."

"You've known me for a week, and you haven't spent more than a day with me. You can't miss me."

"Come over here."

For a moment Alec was quiet. What was he going to say? Just no? Or should he go?

"No."

"What's your address? I'll come to your place."

"If you could get my phone number, I'm sure you're able to get my address. And - don't come here."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want you to."

"I'll see you soon. I'll be over in ... an hour, tops. See you."

And then Magnus hung up. Alec wanted to just bury his face in his pillow and cry, but he knew that he couldn't do that. He needed to call Scott. He needed him to be there. So he dialed his number and waited for him to answer the phone.

"Can you come over?"

Scott was quiet. Alec could hear him breathing on the other end, but he didn't say anything for a while.

"Please. I miss you, Scott."

"I didn't think you were going to call... I thought you might..."

"Wanted to end things? No! Scott, I love you, I just needed a little time."

"Alright. I'll see you in a few minutes, then."

Alec had known it was going to be awkward, but when he saw Scott, he went completely speechless. He didn't even seem that shaken up. He looked amazing. His blond hair was perfect, and he was wearing one of his regular relaxed outfit.

He had no idea what to say to him.

"Are you okay, Alec? You seem.."

"I look awful, I know. Especially compared to you."

He looked down and went to sit in the couch. Scott followed him and sat beside him.

"You don't look awful at all, sweetheart. Not even close. You just seem so tired."

Alec looked at him, forced himself to smile. He wasn't going to tell Scott that Magnus was coming. He wasn't sure how he'd respond to that.

"Thanks, I guess... What have you been up to?"

"Nothing special. The usual. I've been out with a couple friends, worked and just been home. What about you?"

Alec looked down.

"I've just been to work and been home."

Scott looked at him for a moment before he spoke again.

"Hm, I was sure you'd be going out with people."

Alec couldn't help but laugh quietly at that, and looked Scott in the eyes.

"Oh yeah? Who would I be going out with? Who would want to go out with me?"

Scott smiled at him. He seemed happy.

"You're asking the wrong question."

"What's the right question, then?"

Scott took his hand and leaned in on him.

"Who wouldn't want to go out with you?"

Scott kissed him. For a moment he just sat there, blushing, not knowing how to react. Eventually, though, he closed his eyes too, and gave into the kiss. He brought one of his hands to Scott's neck, letting it rest there. Slowly, Scott broke off the kiss, obviously not really wanting to. Alec opened his eyes and looked at him.

"Is this okay?"

He nodded and smiled slightly. He was happy to be with Scott, he really had missed him. Considering how long they had been together, it wasn't weird he had missed him. He hadn't seen him for a week.

So now he just wanted to be with Scott and let himself forget about Magnus and everything else.

* * *

It had been almost 40 minutes since Alec and I talked. I was looking forward to seeing him. I really did miss him, even if I hadn't known him for long. He seemed like a nice guy, and he made me feel things I hadn't felt for years, not since my first crush ever. I couldn't quite figure out if I liked it, though.

My friend had gotten his adress, how, I wasn't sure, and I didn't want to know. I just knew that I had Alec's adress now, and I was going there to talk to him, wether he wanted it or not. He was the first person to make me feel like this in years, and I was going to make damn well sure he knew it.

I knocked three times on the door to Alec's apartment, and without waiting for response, I opened the door. What met me was Alec and Scotts shocked eyes from the couch. They were both shirtless, and Alec was blushing tomato red.

"I .. I told you not to come here, Magnus..."

Alecs voice was nothing more than a whisper, but I heard him perfectly fine. I just stared at him. Scott looked shocked at Alec for a moment, before he got himself together and spoke.

"You said there was nothing between you and.. _him_."

Alec looked absolutely horrified, like he just now realised what he had said to me merely seconds before and snapped his head to look Scott in the eyes. Just that moment, I started paying attention to what they were saying. They had been talking about me, Alec and me.

"There isn't! Scott, I swear, there's nothing between us! I love you!"

Scott had gotten up from his place leaning over Alec, who was pushed against the armrest, and started putting on his shirt.

"But how can I believe that, Alec? He knows where you live, and he doesn't even wait for the door to be answered. He just walks in. What am I supposed to think?"

By the time he had said that, I had regained my composure and I could speak again.

"My friend gave me his adress. This is the first time I'm here."

Scotts eyes were like lightningbolts, aimed at my head. I hadn't closed the door behind me, and the next thing I knew, he walked past me, intentionally bumping his shoulder into mine. Alec just sat there, staring after him.

"Alexander, I..." I started, but he interupted me. He was only whispering, but it felt like it cut the air in half.

"Get out."

His voice was cold, reflecting nothing but hatred. His eyes turned to me, staring holes into my soul. His eyes didn't soften, like they used to, when he looked at me. That's what scared me the most.

"Get out, Magnus. I told you not to come here, and now look what you've done! Why is it so hard for you to listen to me? I want nothing to do with you! Just get out!"

His voice got louder and louder as he spoke until he was shouting. I suppose I couldn't blame him. Maybe I had permanently damaged his relationship with Scott. I didn't know what to say to him. Apologise? It wouldn't help. He would only hate me more.

He hadn't even put on his shirt, just sat in the couch and staring at me. Leave was probably the best thing I could do right now, and maybe just leave him alone, at least for a while.

So that's what I would do for now, leave him alone. "I'm so sorry, Alexander. I'll leave now."

It's not to say I was happy about them having problems, but I couldn't help to feel a small thrill when I thought of them breaking up. Alec being back on the market. And maybe, someday, Alec being all mine.

* * *

**AN: I know, I know, I know, you hate me, I'm sorry! It's been, what, two weeks? Three? I'm sorry!  
Okay, I wanna explain this, or try to. So I was sick for about a week, where I was literally just laying in bed and reading or sleeping. That's what I did. Oh, and I ate a little candy too. But I was really just too tired to write, and I had no imagination at the time, or anything at all.  
And, to make everything better, I've had a couple days without internet. And a lot of school work, so.. I sort of.. Gave up on everything else. But I decided it was time to get this done, and I'm really, really sorry it's been so long! **

**And, oh, I know it's pretty short, but my mind just has no imagination or energy to make up anymore at this exact point in time. But I promise I'll try to keep ALL of the chapters from now on at at least 2,300 words. I'll do my best. **

**Talking about the story, I was trying out something new in this chapter - doing both 3rd person and 1st person points of view! Did you like it, or did you hate it? Should I change the entire story to 1st person, or keep it at 3rd person, or do both? Let me know what you think!**

**And, please. Revieeeew... Yeah, review and tell me how much you hate me, that's gonna work out. Okay, sorry, just review! xD I hope you don't hate me too much. 3 **


	7. Chapter 7

When I woke up in Magnus' arms, I wasn't quite sure what had happened. I didn't remember going to his place last night, or even this morning, so I had no idea what I was doing there. This was definitly not my own apartment.

To this point, I still have no idea how to describe what I felt. I was happy, I liked Magnus, and I could feel this happiness deep in my stomach, deep in my entire body.

But at the same time, I could feel something tugging within me, something that wasn't right. And then I remembered why - I was not supposed to be here. I started moving away from Magnus, halfway in a sitting position, when Magnus' hand started tugging on my shoulder, pulling me back into his arms. He wasn't awake, and I didn't want to wake him up.

I sighed, and leaned back into his arms, placing my head lightly on his chest and laying my arm over his stomach. I realised our legs were tangled together. I just layed back and tried to relax, but I couldn't forget.

I was not supposed to be there, not at all. I only faintly remembered Magnus' name when I woke up, and that was only a name tugging in the back of my head, telling me that this guy was Magnus.

I looked up at him, not being able to fall back asleep. I was never one to go back to sleep when I was already awake. His make up was smeared, and his hair was sticking out to all sides - even more than usually, I was guessing. He was lightly snoring, looking somewhat peaceful in his sleep. I noticed, and started blushing lightly, that he had a few hickeys on his neck. He had a few bruises running alone his jawline, but you barely noticed them if you just saw him, and I bet he had quite a few ways of hiding them with his sparkly makeup... Thinking about the makeup, I noticed the light glitter all over his face. The pillows was covered in it as well.

He was quite beautiful, and I couldn't quite seem to wrap my mind around how I could forget him. Sure, I had probably been drinking, otherwise I don't think I would've ended up here. I was normally way too shy to be with a guy the first night I met him.

Because, I assumed we had ... _been together_. I was only wearing some pretty ruined boxers, and even if I couldn't see Magnus' lower body, because of the duvet, I assumed he was wearing just about the same amount of clothing I was. My boxers were in threads, so it was very unlikely that nothing happened last night.

Magnus turned his head without opened his eyes, and tugged me a little bit closer to his body. I couldn't help but smile. Then he slowly opened his eyes, squinting against the sudden daylight from the window to my side. He opened his eyes again, and smiled at me. I didn't notice his smile, though. Those eyes were beautiful. They had the strangest colour, green and yellow and had an almost feline pupil instead of the normal, round one, and they had a special spark in them, that I had never seen before.

All of that, though, was pushed out of my mind when he leaned in on me and kissing me, only briefly, a chaste kiss. When he broke of the kiss, there was a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. When he spoke, his voice was clearly affected by the fact that he had just woken up.

"Amazing the things you wake up with every now and then, huh?"

* * *

Alec had been awake for hours, just sitting around. He tried reading, sleeping, watching TV, but he couldn't forget about what happened the day before. He had tried calling Scott countless times, but he never answered. A few times he did answer, but hung up as soon as he heard Alecs voice.

Alec missed him, and he wanted to go see him. But he wasn't sure if he was ready to face him. Technically, he did cheat on him, even if it was just a few kisses. He had never gone past kissing with Magnus, he could never do that. Even kissing Magnus had been hard for him.

Alec hated Magnus. He did. If he hadn't hated him before, he hated him now. He just wanted to forget about him, he had wanted to do that ever since he got home from Magnus' place that night. And after that, it seemed he couldn't get any peace from him. He had tried to just forget about him, but what had happened then? Everything with Scott got screwed up, just when it was getting fixed. Alec honest didn't think there was any chances anymore. He was sure he had lost Scott. So he decided to call Magnus and tell him just how much he had ruined.

"Hello?"

"Alexander, so nice to hear from you. But I have company, so I shouldn't be on the phone. We have.. other things to attend to."

Alec was surprised at just how much it stung him. He could hear a guy in the background, saying something to Magnus, sounding like, "Don't tell him that, Mags!" and giggling. Actually giggling. Alec could feel the hot sting of tears in his eyes.

"So that's what you do? You just drop by to ruin my life, and then it's on to the next guy you find the slightest bit attractive?" Alec couldn't help the tone in his voice. He was getting mad at Magnus, and he was hurt. Everything with Scott could be ruined, and Magnus was fooling around with some guy.

"Alexander, I'll pop by in.. What time is it, Johnny? ... Okay, Alexander, I'll be by in an hour or two, and we'll talk, okay? See you then."

And then Magnus hung up. His voice hadn't change once from the cheery tone. Alec decided then, that maybe if Scott didn't want him anymore, he should just quit dating for some time. It wasn't like anyone would want him anyway, even if Scott kept telling him about the gazes from everyone when they were out.

He didn't want to consider Scott not wanting him, though. If Scott broke up with him, he would break down. That would be the last drop to make it all spill. He wasn't ready to let Scott go, not at all, he loved him. Scott was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Alec knew he wasn't good enough for Scott, though. Everyone adored Scott, and Alec was just sort of.. on the sideline. Scott loved him, he knew that, but he was way too good for him. Scott would always be able to get a date, or just hang out with friends, or just go some place and meet people. Alec couldn't do that; he was way too shy. He would just be sitting in a corner and watching the party, maybe smiling a little bit at the people who glanced at him from time to time. And really, he was okay with that. That was ho he was. But he was really holding Scott back, and he wasn't worth it. Scott was beautiful and always had this glow, while Alec blended with the shadows. Well, he almost did, but his face was too pale.

So for now, what was there to do? He could call Scott again, or he could sit and wait for Magnus. He didn't feel like either of those two things, since they'd probably end up in the same thing anyway - getting rejected.

* * *

When I had dropped Johnny of at his place, I drove my car back home, and walked to Alec's place. I needed the fresh air more than anything, to calm myself, and forget about people for a while.

I didn't remember bringing Johnny home. I didn't even remember seeing him at the party last night. He was goodlooking though, so why not get the best out of things? I didn't feel anything for the guy. Maybe it was just as Alec had said - I screwed up someones life and moved on. That what I'd done for long now, but I never thought of it that way.

I did consider Johnny a one-night stand, it wasn't my first, and it wouldn't be my last. I couldn't even count the times I had woken up in some guys apartment or with some guy next to me in my bed. Sometimes I remembered them, sometimes I didn't.

But the day before, all I needed was a distraction. And that happened to be Johnny. I needed to forget about all the problems I had, I especially needed to forget about Alec and Scott. Alec was the best looking guy I had seen for long, and he was sweet, too. But Scott was in the way. He always had been in my way, always.

Those big blue eyes dug into my mind as I walked up the stairs to Alec's apartment. So innocent, and yet so filled with knowledge of the world. I had never seen a pair of eyes to match, and I could just stare at them all day if he'd let me.

But for now, I needed to forget about those goddamned cerulean eyes, and start thinking about how to get Scott entirely out of the picture. If I had the slightest chance with Alec, I was taking it no matter what.

* * *

As I walked into the apartment for the second time, not bothering to even knock on the door this time, Alec was laying on the couch. He was wearing a blanket and had a book in his hands.

In the back of my mind, I couldn't help picturing him laying like that in my apartment. The second picture that popped up in my head, was Alec with a bare chest. With slightly toned muscles and the milky skin I couldn't get out of my head.

As soon as he heard the door close behind me, he looked up and back to his book. _It must be very exciting if he can read when he's with me_. I couldn't help getting irritated. Here I was, to talk to him like he wanted, and he was _reading_?

"There's coffee in the kitchen, if you want some. I suppose you can find it yourself, considering how comfortable you are here, just walking in."

I couldn't help a smirk from spreading across my face. "Yeah, sorry about that. The kitchen's out there, right?" I asked, pointing to the room on the other end of a small hallway. He glanced quickly, nodding, and returning his attention to the book. I couldn't help feeling a bit proud, it was my first guess.

"See, I knew you'd be able to find your way around. What do you do all day, besides sleeping with random guys? Stalk me?"

"Oh yes, that's all I do. You have a few interesting habits I'd like to hear more about, but we can talk about that later," I called from the kitchen, while ruffling through the cupboards, trying to find a cup. I finally found one and started pouring from the coffee pot standing on the table with fresh coffee.

I then joined him on the couch, sitting in the opposite end of the couch. He first dragged his legs closer to himself, so I could sit down, but changed his mind halfway through the motion, and then let them rest over my legs. He continued reading, which was bothering me, but it gave me the opportunity to look at him properly.

His black hair was muffled, almost like he just got out of bed, and his blue eyes were slowly moving in a line, back to where it started, and started over as he read. He read rather quickly. He was wearing a regular black sweater, and as far as I could feel, I'd say he was wearing jeans, and considering his style, I guess they were dark.

My hands went under the blanket and I started to give him a footrub. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Yesterday."

"What about yesterday?"

I wanted more than just one-word answers. I know he was upset, but he wanted to talk to me, so he had to start talking. I couldn't read his mind, so I couldn't do all the talking.

"When you.. Came here yesterday."

It was obvious, that by now, he was no longer reading. He just couldn't look at me while talking to me about this. I understood him, I did. That just didn't seem to make things easier.

"Magnus, I need you to understand how much effect that had on me and Scott.. It might have ruined our relationship completely, I don't know, he won't pick up the phone, and we were already fighting about you. I don't need things to be any worse now, and that's exactly what you made it, don't you see that?"

His voice was close to breaking, and I didn't know what to tell him. I wanted Alec and Scott to break up, so I could get a chance. But I wanted Alec to be happy too, I didn't want him to sit around and cry over Scott, because then nothing good would come out of it.

"I know that, Alec, and I'm sorry. But I'm just not sure what you want me to do. I didn't know he was here. And you hadn't answered the phone a week before that, and I wanted to see you."

"Why did you want to see me, Magnus? There's nothing between us, I thought I made that much clear."

He looked directly at me at that point, staring into my eyes. Searching for the truth. So the truth was what he was going to get.

"I know there's nothing between us, but honestly Alexander, I really like you, and I hope that one day something will happen between us, something good. I know that doesn't justify ruining the relationship you're in now, and I'm sorry for that. I missed you, that's all."

His eyes found the book again. Just staring at it. He didn't say anything for a while, and when he did, his voice was a soft as silk, and nothing more than a whisper.

"I like you too Magnus, but I don't see how this can work out. I can't cheat on him again, I simply can't. You're a beautiful man, but I can't look past everything with Scott. And maybe, if I cheated on Scott, I'm afraid I'll cheat on the next one, and the next one. I don't want to be that person, I simply can't be that person. That'd tear me apart."

He turned his gaze at me, my eyes, and our eyes locked for a second or two, until he broke the eyecontact and looked at his book again.

"You have such beautiful eyes, Alexander."

He snapped his head to look at me. I was sitting in the same place as before, and he was lying the same place as before, but everything felt different now, like we'd gone an entirely different place. I was still rubbing his feet, but now more absently, not thinking about it, and not even realising I was doing it. His bluch had been in place for long now, and it continued turning more and more read, until his face resembled a tomato. I couldn't help but smile at him when he said the next few words.

"I like your eyes too, Magnus."

And then I kissed him.

* * *

**AN:** **Hiiiii, guys! So, quick update, to make up for the long waiting time on the last chapter. I'll try to get two new chapters out next week too, if I can, so I hope you don't mind reading! :D **

**Anyway, this is one of the longer chapters, and I tried using more of 1st person POV, because, seriously, I never use that.  
And also, there was something I forgot telling you guys in the last update! I am going to be in the DM in Short Story Writing (a Danish competition), where I have to send in a short story by October 1st. I have a couple started out, but I still have no idea which one to send in, so until then, it MIGHT be a little longer updating time, and I apologise for that! I hope it's okay with you guys. **

**And, I was reading the reviews, I got a new one this morning, or whenever it was, today! Talking about being on Team Scott. I was seriously surprised, I didn't expect this to be something like choosing teams! xD But I'm guessing most of you are on Team Magnus, anyway? Haha. :D **

**But, guys, keep reviewing, it makes my days worth living through! **

**Hope you liked it!**

**PS. Oh and - what would you guys say to a smaller ... competition? I'm drawing Isabelle Lightwood at the time (not from the actors of the movie, but the way I always pictured her), and even though it's far from finished, I think we can do this. Okay, the review numbers shows 14, but the actual number is 16 (I counted, 'cause there were some that didn't show up on the number, and that was strange). Should we say, the person that hits the review number 20, that being the number 4 review from now, will get this Isabelle Lightwood dedicated to them, if they'd like, or they can request a person for me to draw next, that will be dedicated to them! How does that sound to you? Okay? Let's do it! Go! **


	8. Chapter 8

His eyes shut for a moment, until they fluttered open once again, and he pushed Magnus away, wiping his mouth. "What the hell, Magnus!"

Magnus was watching him with sadness marking his face. His upperbody was hovering a few inches above Alec, and now he hurried back in the opposite corner of the couch. He wanted to kiss him again, because he felt Alec leaning into the kiss at first. He felt his body relax. Alec had wanted to kiss him, but for some reason, that desire was gone.

"You kissed me back, Alexander."

Alec froze for a second. "N-no, I-"

"Alexander, stop. Just stop."

"I told you it's Alec. Stop calling me Alexander."

They locked eyes for a few second as they looked at each other. Alec's face was still burning red. His blue eyes staring into Magnus' yellow/golden and green ones. He sat up, and pulled his legs back from Magnus. He was breathing harder than before, and for a moment Magnus thought he was going to shout at him. But he didn't.

Small tears began running down Alec's face. He quickly banned them from his face by wiping them away with the sleave of his sweater. He then covered his face with his hands, and his shoulders slowly started jumping up and down at the same speed small sobs escaped him.

Magnus didn't know what to do. He never thought he'd have to handle Alexander crying, not today at least. He was prepared to be yelled and screamed at, banned from the apartment, Alec's hatred, being accused of splitting the couple up, and so many other things. But Alec crying wasn't one of those things. So he just sat there, not looking at him, for a long time.

He didn't know how long it had been when Alec finally stopped sobbing, revealing his face with red eyes and the cheeks and chin wet from the tears. Magnus looked at him.

"I'm sorry, Magnus, I just - ... I don't know, it's just too much. I have to pretend not to care about things, I have to, or everyone will think I'm weak. I know I'm weak, but I can't... I... I don't know. It takes its toll on me..."

Magnus put a hand on his shoulder and hushed him softly. "It's okay, Alexa- ... Alec. You don't have to be strong around me."

Alec looked at him, searching his eyes to see if he was telling the truth. To Magnus own surprise, he was. He didn't mind Alec being vulnerable around him. He just needed to figure out how to handle it.

"Thanks," Alec whispered. Magnus smiled half-heartedly at him.

"I'm here for you Alexander, for whatever you need me for. Just know that."

Alec just nodded and sat closer to Magnus. He leaned closer to him, and rested his head on his shoulder. Magnus put his arm around around him.

"Thank you Magnus."

Alec's voice was still nothing more than a whisper, but Magnus knew he meant it. Yes, he wanted to be more than Alec's _friend_, but for now that had to do. Maybe, over time, things could be better. Maybe they'd get together, eventually. Maybe.

"Any time, Alexander."

* * *

_Scott didn't look at Alec. Scott was sitting on the bench, next to Alec, and he wasn't saying anything. Alec looked at him, patiently. He was waiting for him to break the silence. _

_"So what is it, Scott?"_

_Scott had asked him to meet him there, after work. Now they sat here, Scott had barely said anything since Alec got here. He had asked him to meet him there, because he needed to tell him something, and Alec was getting nervous. _

_"Well.. I.. Uh.." _

_This wasn't like Scott at all. He didn't get nervous, at least not around Alec. He never had, not once. Alec was trying to be patient, but it was getting hard. He wanted to know so badly. He wanted to know what the one thing making Scott nervous could possibly be. _

_"Well?" _

_"I was just wondering.. Well.."_

_Alec eyed him up. His hands looked clammy, and he was furiously wiping them off in his jeans every few seconds. He usually didn't have clammy hands, Alec knew. He had touched Scotts hands before, and every time a small spark went through his body. Scotts eyes was directly pointed towards the ground. _

_"I'm listening, Scott." _

_"Would you.. I, uh.. Would you consider.. Going out with me?" _

_"_What?!_"_

_"I-I just.. I've liked you for a long time, and I hoped that you might-" _

_"Y-yes."_

_"Yes?" _

_"Yes, I'll go out with you, Scott."_

* * *

The memory made Alec's eyes tear up again. Magnus had left about an hour later, and Alec had crawled to bed and stayed there. He even called in sick for work, because he knew that handling customers, or just sitting around, or doing anything at all, would only make him feel even worse.

The day Scott asked him out, he got a text while he was at work from Scott, telling him to meet him in the park when he got off work. The rest of the day, his eyes had been finding their way back to the clock on the wall, waiting to go see Scott. Scott had been the highlight of his days, the only good thing in the huge chaos his life was.

Thinking that Scott might not want to continue their relationship, Alec was brought to tears, once again. It had happened countless times the last few hours. It happened every time he thought of something, a happy memory with Scott. Even the sad memories, the fights, every little insignificant detail of his life with Scott brought him to tears. He hated it.

His phone rang and interupted his thoughts. It was in the other room, and he got up quickly and walked in there in a quick pace. It might be Scott. He weren't that lucky, though.

* * *

"Scott! Are you okay? Oh God, baby..."

Scott was laying in the hospital bed. His face was bruised, and with every little movement he made, he winced because of the pain. His entire body was bruised, or that's what Alec was guessing, since he couldn't see much.

Scott smiled at him, faintly, a sad smile. It broke Alec's heart.

"You called me baby. You never call me anything like that."

Alec smiled a little bit, and sat next to Scott's bed. "I heard you were in a crash. Are you okay?"

Scott started nodding, but stopped in the middle of the movement, wincing from the bruising. Alec tried not to show how much it bothered him, but he knew he failed miserably.

"I promise. I'm okay. It just stings a bit."

Scott didn't sound convincing at all, and Alec just wanted to cry, like he had done for hours. He knew he couldn't. Not in front of Scott. He just couldn't. He just nodded, slowly, and looked down at his hands resting in his lap.

"You look so sad, darling. Have you been crying?"

"A little bit... Scott, I'm so sorry about everything, I just- ... I promise, nothing has happened between me and Magnus."

Scott hesitated for a moment, looking at Alec and biting his bottom lip - a habit he had picked up from Alec.

"I believe you."

Alec looked at him, surprised. He had expected Scott to hate him. But then again, why would he had the hospital call _him_ as the first person after a crash?

"You do?"

Scott paused again. It was becoming a habit for him, Alec had noticed, and he wasn't sure if he liked it.

"Of course I do. I love you, Alec, I just... Seeing him walking into your apartment as if he had been there a million times before, after not seeing you for a week, it just.. it got the best of me. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I just want to know.. Are we.. okay?"

Scott paused, but longer than the other times. There was at least two minutes where he didn't say anything, just looked at his own hands in his lap and biting his lip.

"I don't know, Alec."

"But... you said..."

"I know what I said. But this whole thing has made me realise, that I might not be ready to take this relationship any further. I'm just not ready for a relationship this serious. I mean, I'm picking fights with you all the time, and I'm accusing you of things you would never do. Maybe we should spend some time apart, so I can figure out what I want."

That's what broke Alec. Tears started running down his cheeks, racing faster than ever. He didn't even care about them anymore, didn't even want to wipe them away. The tears dropped from his chin and down on his clothing, eventually seeping through.

"It doesn't have to be serious, Scott..."

"Alec, we've been together for more than a year now. I love you, but I don't think I'm ready for this commitment. Please don't cry."

Alec wiped away the tears, and tried holding in the other ones that were burning behind his eyes. He forced a smile in place, and he knew how fake it looked. And was.

"It's okay. But I have to go."

He got up from the chair and turned towards the door.

"We're still friends, right?"

Now it was Alec's time to pause.

"Of course we're friends, Scott."

And then he headed towards the door, letting the tears run as they would. He left Scott in a hospital room by himself. Even if all he wanted to go back in, and make the speech of his life, telling Scott why they should be together, he knew he wouldn't be able to do so. So for now, he got out his phone and dialed the number.

"I need you, Magnus."

And then he hung up. Not even waiting for the reply.

He was almost home, when he saw Magnus down the street. He knew how he must have looked. Red eyes with tears still streaming down the cheeks, his eyes big from crying. His shirt wet where the tears had stained it. He didn't want to talk to Magnus about it.

He just wanted him to hold him for hours and hours, and never let go.

* * *

**AN: HI GUYS. I UPDATED AGAIN. I don't really now why, though, there's still two reviews left to lucky number 20. The competition's still on. **

**But yeah, I don't even know why I updated now. That's three times in one week, isn't it? Aren't you just full of joy? **

**I wasn't a long chapter though, but I hope you liked it. I know it was really short, but yeah. I'm tired. And thanks for the reviews on the last chapter! Even if it was just two, they were very positive, haha.  
So, thanks. **

**I hope you liked it. **


	9. Chapter 9

The next week passed by slowly. Magnus was over almost every day, and Alec cried himself to sleep every night. One night, Magnus slept over. Alec had no spare bed, and he didn't want to ask Magnus to sleep on the couch, so they slept in the same bed. They didn't _do_ anything, they just slept.

Alec knew about Magnus' feelings, but he kept forgetting about it. Every time he wasn't looking at Magnus though, he could feel his gaze on him. It was getting hard. He knew he had to make a decision, but how could he? He liked Magnus, of course, who wouldn't? But he still loved, and missed, Scott. It had only been a week.

Once in a while, Alec thought Magnus was going to kiss him. When they caught each others eyes, and they both stopped talking, just staring at each other. He never ended up kissing Alec, though. Sometimes Alec wasn't sure if it was a good or a bad thing. He liked Magnus, but he wasn't ready for a new relationship. But sometimes his hands itched to fix his hair or his makeup, if it had smeared even the slightest.

Scott hadn't call him since he was at the hospital. Alec hadn't tried to call him. He wanted to, desperately, but he knew he needed to move on, or at least try to. All of the memories they had shared made Alec tear up.

Today was one of the days where Magnus sat next to him in the couch, watching him, while Alec was reading. It was hard for him to concentrate when he did that, but he tried. He was reading one of his favourite books, Life as we knew it by Susan Beth Pfeffer. Or, well, he was trying to, but Magnus kept watching him.

"Stop staring at me," Alec said. "It's uncomfortable."

"Sorry. You're just really beautiful."

Magnus had been pretty blunt about his feelings for Alec over the last week or so. Alec got uncomfortable every time he said something like that, he couldn't help it. He liked getting compliments, he wasn't used to it, but he wasn't sure if it was a good thing when it came from Magnus. He was always flirting with Alec.

Alec looked up at him and met his eyes. Cerulean blues meeting yellowgreens. "You're always saying stuff like that," he said quietly.

"That's because it's true."

Alec started biting his lip and looked down again. "But it's not."

"Alexander, do you think you could ever feel enough for me to go out with me?"

"What?"

He turned his entire upperbody towards Magnus and looked at him.

"You heard me."

"I.. I don't.."

Magnus was looking him in the eyes. He did that awfully often, and Alec got speechless every time he did that. His eyes were so beautiful.

"Alexander, I just want to know. If not, I might as well stop flirting with you this way, because it's obvious you get effected by it, and I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

Alec bit his lip and looked down, put the book on the table, where Magnus' coffee was standing. He pulled his legs up under his chin in the couch, and wrapped his arms around his legs.

"I don't know, Magnus," he said honestly. "I don't know. I don't know if I'll ever get over Scott. I don't know if I'll ever be ready to go out with you, or generally be in a relationship with you."

Magnus nodded, slowly, hesitating. "Should I stop flirting with you?"

Alec shook his head, slowly. He wasn't looking at Magnus, so he didn't see the huge grin spreading across Magnus' face. But his voice revealed his happiness so much that Alec had to look at him.

"I won't stop, then."

Alec was blushing, a deep crimson red. He couldn't help it. Magnus did this to him pretty much every day.

"Am I staying over here for tonight?"

Alec shrugged. "If you want to..."

"I always want to, Alexander."

"My sister is coming over later, though."

Magnus nodded. He didn't seem to mind. He had heard some things about Isabelle Lightwood, but not much. Quite frankly she sounded like a pain in the ass, but anything to stay with Alec for the night.

"Sure."

* * *

"Alec! How do _you_ know _him_?!"

Isabelle was 'whisper-shouting'. Magnus was in the kitchen, getting some coffee, and Isabelle and Alec was sitting on the couch together. Alec was curled up in the corner with a blanket, like he was most days, and Isabelle was leaning close to him so he'd be able to hear what she said.

"W-what? I told you he was going to be here, Izzy-"

"You said Magnus! Not _Magnus Bane_!"

"What's so special about him?"

Isabelle gasped and looked horrified at him. "He's a _fashion model_, Alec!"

"He is?"

And then Magnus walked into the room, carrying a cup of coffee for himself and one for Isabelle. He put Isabelles in front of her and sat down in the armchair on the other side of the table. Alec looked at him. He was goodlooking, very. But it never struck him that Magnus could be a model. Maybe it was the eyes.

"Right! I picked you up a magazine, Alec," Isabelle said, taking her bag and pulled up a fashion magazine. She put it on the table, but Alec didn't look at it.

"Just put it with the others. You know I'll never read them, so why do you insist on buying these every month?"

Before Isabelle could grab it again, to put it in the pile with the others, Magnus grabbed it. "You don't read them?" He sounded a bit sad. Alec looked at him.

"What's wrong?"

"This is my magazine," Magnus said, turning it so Alec could see the cover, which was a picture of Magnus with a million stripes in his hair with all the colours of the rainbow. You could only see him from the shoulders and up, and he was in a pose, but it was definitely him. Alec blushed.

"I didn't know that."

Magnus nodded, looking sad, and put the magazine back down on the table. _Why does it bother him so much,_ Alec thought. It didn't make sense. It was only a magazine.

"If it helps, you look great on the cover."

Alec couldn't help, the words just slipped out. He hadn't meant to say them out loud. He blushed a deep crimson red, and crumbled even more into his corner of the couch. Magnus' face lit up in a huge grin.

"Thanks."

* * *

Soon Isabelle left, and Alec and I were left to ourself. For a little while, none of us said anything. It was quiet in the apartment, and after a while I couldn't take it anymore. So I decided to break the silence.

"Did you mean what you said earlier?"

He looked up at me. "What did I say?"

"That I look good on the cover."

"Oh," Alec said, blushing bright red. "Yeah... I meant it."

I smiled and looked down on my hands. He had actually given me a compliment. He hadn't done that since he told me he liked my eyes a week ago. He had implied things he liked about me, but never a direct compliment.

I wanted to kiss him so badly. But I knew I couldn't.

"You're just not ready for a relationship, right?" I asked, and looked at him. He shook his head slowly, not looking at me. I had already known the answer to the question, so I don't even know why I asked.

"But..."

I looked at him. "But?"

"But maybe I will be."

My heart skipped a beat and a grin spread across my face.

"You know, we don't have to jump right into a relationship... If you wanna try it out, without any real commitment... We could do that."

He hesitated for a moment. "You're not supposed to be my.. what's the word.. rebound."

I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to wait for him. But I needed to be with him. I was beginning to get addicted to the days we spent together, just sitting around. But I didn't want to be his rebound, either. I wanted him to be generally happy to be with me. Not just being with me because Scott left him.

I looked down, not knowing what to tell him.

"I wanna be with you," he whispered. "But I'm afraid it's just because of everything going on with Scott."

I looked at him. "Well, what do you think?"

"I think.. I think I wanna be with you for you. But I can't be sure."

I smiled. Maybe there was a chance after all, maybe I could actually be with this beautiful man. Maybe some day, he would really be mine. Until then, I just had to be patient.

And hope I didn't ruin everything for myself.

* * *

When I woke up the next morning, I couldn't help but smile. At some point during the night, I had curled up next to Alec, putting my head on his chest and an arm around his waist, and he had put an arm around my shoulders. All while we slept. We fit together well, according to me at least, and maybe some day we could be together. I snuggled up closer to Alec and shut my eyes, trying to go back to sleep.

That, however, was impossible. I couldn't forget about lying in the same bed as Alec, and how close we were. After a while, I slowly sat up and looked at him. His eyes fluttered open then.

"I didn't think you were awake," he whispered. "I didn't want to wake you up."

I smiled. "I woke up a few minutes ago."

He sat up and looked at me. He looked me in the eyes and took my hand.

"You look so sweet when you're sleeping."

For once, I actually blushed. I didn't happen often, barely ever, but Alec here somehow effected me much more than anyone had before. What was it about this guy that maked my heart skip beats all the time?

"Thank you," I said quietly, and leaning in to kiss him on the cheek. He turned his head, though, so I ended up kissing his lips. I blushed then, and I could feel the warmth from his face. I pulled away after a few seconds and looked at him, a smile playing at the corner of my lips.

"What are we going to do today? Just hang around here?"

He smiled at me, looking down on our hands. "We could watch a movie," he suggested quietly. I nodded.

Maybe this was going to fast, but I didn't care. He was so amazing. Those blue eyes kept haunting my dreams, and that sweet, shy smile was almost too adorable to bear. He wouldn't leave my mind, he never exited them, but I didn't mind. This was Alexander, and I had no way to keep him out from my mind.

Even if I wanted to.

* * *

**AN: Hiiii. So, the winner of my competition has been found! . .Tan was the lucky number 20, and that's who the drawing will be dedicated her. Go congratulate her! **

**I know this chapter isn't too long, but I hope you liked it anyway. Starting monday, I will have school every monday night too, so ... yeah. There's a lot of stuff happening in my life. I hope you won't mind that the updates may take a bit longer. **

**Thanks for the reviews for the last chapter, I got a lot of them! 8, if my counting is right! That's the most I've gotten on a single chapter so far. Seriously guys, I really appreciate all the love! Thank you! **

**I hope you didn't hate this chapter too much, but review and tell me what you think! **


	10. Chapter 10

**Hey guys, just a quick note here at the beginning. I listened to The Fray - Heartless while writing the entire second part of this chapter, so I recommend you listen to it while you read it!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"Magnus, what are you doing?"

Magnus was standing with a pictureframe in his hand. He was standing by my shelves, his head leaning forward to look at the picture, and a wide smile lit up his entire face. I had been in the kitchen, but I hadn't been gone for more than a minute or two. He looked at me, but didn't put the picture down, nor did he move even the slightest out of place.

"I was just looking at this picture. How old were you when this was taken?"

He held the picture frame so I could see the picture. It was a picture of me and Isabelle, arms around each others shoulders, and both of our faces were almost split in half in giant smiles. I had been seven at the time, and Isabelle were five. On the picture we were standing on a field full of grass and flowers, and you could see a horse in the background.

"Seven. I hate that picture."

His brows furrowed together and he looked at the picture, trying to find what was wrong with it. He couldn't find it, so I decided to tell him.

"My dimples."

"What? Come on, Alexander, your dimples were cute. Still are."

I shook my head a little bit, but realised he couldn't see.

"I hate them."

"Well, lucky they're not as 'bad' now then, huh?"

I bit my lip and walked over to him, taking the picture from his hand. I put it back on the shelf, putting it in exactly the right angle. He watched me while I did this, still smiling at me. He then proceeded to take another one of the pictures standing on one of the shelves. This was a newer one, taken only a couple months back. This one was of Jace and I. Jace was standing with both arms around me, I was pinned to a wall, and he was leaning closer to me as if he was whispering something in my ear. I was blushing and my eyes were wide. Isabelle had taken the picture and insisted on framing and then put it on Alec's shelf and refused it taken down. Magnus looked at it.

"Who's this?"

"That's Jonathan."

"You never told me about a Jonathan."

I looked at him. He was envious. It was obvious. I couldn't help but smile a little bit. He was actually jealous of my brother.

"You're right. I didn't. That's Jace."

"Your brother?"

I took the picture from him and put it back, exactly where it always stood. Then I turned to look a Magnus.

"Adoptive brother, yes."

"What is it with you? Everything has to have the right angle, be exactly where it was before. Why?"

I blushed slightly and looked down. I had always been this way. I had to have my system. But whenever I was confronted with it, it sounded like an illness, or that I was a maniac about these things. Maybe I was. But when it just was, and no one said it out loud, it was normal. Normal to me. When no one talked about it, it was just like a routine.

"It's nothing. Just something I always did."

I wasn't looking at Magnus, but suddenly Magnus' fingers intertwined with mine. I looked up at him through my eyelashes. He then rested his other hand on my shoulder, massaging my shoulder soothingly. I looked at him. He leaned closer, slowly, giving me time to push him away or protest. But I didn't.

He kissed me, pushing me up against the shelves. I could hear the rattling of things tilting and at the moment I didn't care. I almost fell back into the shelves, but I regained my balance. He slid his tounge against my bottom lip, silently asking for permission. I hesitated. But somehow his tongue slid between my lips and into my mouth. I then softly pushed him away, which only made him groan and begin to kiss his was down my neck. I leaned my head back against the top shelf and breathed out.

"Magnus-" I started, but my words quickly grew into a low moan as he started nibbling softly on my skin. My hand was now resting on his neck, but I didn't even remember putting it there.

What was this man doing to me?

* * *

_"Mom, dad, I believe Alec has something to tell you." _

_Isabelles voice was loud in the otherwise quiet room. They were eating dinner, and as usual, no one said a word. Not until Isabelle spoke, anyway. They were all sitting at the table, Maryse in one end and Robert in the other. Max and Isabelle sat on one side, and Jace and Alec on the other. _

_Alec almost choked on his food, and blushed deeply when all attention was turned to him. He hated when everyones eyes was resting on him, and even more when if was about something like this. Because he knew exactly what Isabelle meant._

_"Well, Alexander?" Maryse said when a few minutes had passed. Alec hadn't said anything yet, he didn't want to. Didn't want them to know. But they had to eventually. And they probably wouldn't even care anyway. He hesitated anyway, but after a while, he stammered his way through the dreaded sentence._

_"Mom.. Dad.. I'm gay."_

_Maryse and Robert didn't say anything for a while, they were just staring at him. He had already told his siblings, a couple weeks ago, and he had hoped that his parents would take it as well as his siblings had done. That, however, was clear now that they wouldn't. _

_"Get out of my house." _

_Maryse's voice rang through the room. Alec stared at her. He couldn't believe what his mother had just said. He looked to his dad for support, but only found a face twisted in disgust as his father watched him. He felt hot tears sting behind his eyes. He looked back at his mother. _

_"Mom..."_

_"Get out of my house. I will not have someone like ... _that_ in my house. Get out. I don't care where you go, I want you out of here. And to think I thought you were a good kid." _

_His mother got up from her seat and left the room without another word. His father got up the next second, and then pulled Alec from his chair and dragging him out of the house. He pushed him out the door and shut the door after him. For a while he just stood there, looking at the closed door. Then it opened again, and Isabelle stepped outside. She had a bag in the hand and handed it to him._

_"I called Dan. You can stay at his place. Here's some of your clothes, but it's not much. Give them a couple days and they'll regret this Alec, I promise." _

_He could see tears in her eyes, and wondered if she was going to cry. One thing he didn't expect though, was her taking a few steps closer to him and hugging him. He didn't mind though. He hugged her back and pulled her closer. She buried her face in the soft fabric of his shirt, and soon he could hear her muffled sobs. But he had promised himself he wouldn't cry. Not now. And especially not in front of Isabelle. He just hugged her tighter and whispered things like 'everything will be okay' and 'I'll be back home in no time'. But inside, he knew that he would never call this a home again._

_How bittersweet it was to be right sometimes._

* * *

**AN: Hi guuuuys. Sorry it's been so long, I've had so much to do lately! It's not so long, but I really wanted to update, because.. I felt bad about not updating sooner. I'm sorry.  
We got a little bit of Alec's background in here, I hope you liked that, because there will be more of that. Not in every chapter, but there will definitely be more of it. **

**We got a little bit of Malec in here, too! How did you like it? I haven't written much fluff so far, so I don't know how good I am at writing it, so tell me what you thought of it! I really appreciate the reviews guys!  
**

**But yeah, review and tell me what you liked and didn't like! Reviews are love!**

**Hope you liked it. **


	11. Chapter 11

"Go on in, Alexander. Father William is waiting for you inside."

Alec was standing next to his aunt in church. They were standing beside the confession rooms. His aunt, Olivia, had never denied his existence like his parents had. She, however, seemed to think it was just as wrong as they did; she merely thought that God could change the fact that he was gay. She had brought him to church every month for the last two years, and had made him confess every time.

"Will you be waiting out here?"

"Not today. I will be praying for Muriel today. Her son has gone sick, and she needs the light of God. Wait for me here if you do not wish to pray yourself; I'll find you."

Alec nodded and went inside the small room. Father William was sitting by the table as the priest would always be, and he gestured for Alec to take a seat on the other side of the small wall, made of thin tree.

Alec had never been comfortable around Father William, but he was better than Father Thomas had ever been. Father Thomas was the priest Alec would normally talk to, but he had died not more than a few weeks ago. This would be the first time Alec was confessing to Father William, but he had talked to him a few times in church.

Alec sat down on the other side of the wall, where a small bench was standing. He could hear the ruffling of Father William's clothes as the priest settled down. Alec did the sign of the cross.

"Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. It has been 27 days since my last confession."

"What brings you here, my child?"

Alec took a sharp breath. Whenever the priest would ask him that, he always wanted to say, "My aunt finds it appropriate given certain circumstances." He never did, though.

"Father, I have cast shame upon my family."

"How so?"

"I have felt sexual attraction to another man, Father."

There was a moment of silence. There was more ruffling from Father William's clothes.

"Has this happened to you before, my child?"

"Yes, Father. It has happened before. Many times."

"When was the first time?"

"A few years ago, Father. My family has disowned me because of it."

Father William didn't say anything for a few moments. Alec knew how it was. They always took a little while to process the fact that his family disowned him. Finally, Father William asked,

"Did you come here by yourself, my child?"

"No, Father, my aunt is here with me. She is praying for her friends' son. He has gone terribly sick. My aunt is praying for God to help her friend and her family."

"Do you live with your aunt?"

"No, Father. I live by myself. My aunt is kind enough to bring me to church every month."

"Your aunt is a wise woman, my child. God can help you if you let Him. You do not have to live like this."

"I know, Father, I admire and love her."

"Good. I advise you to pray every day and God _will_ help you. I absolve you of your sins in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit."

"Thank you, Father."

Alec did the sign of the cross, like he was supposed to, and got up. He left the room without looking at Father William again.

Alec sat on one of the benches in the church. He folded his hands and closed his eyes, starting to pray. He always did this after a confession, because no matter if he was religious or not, he had been brought up to pray every day and he had always found some sort of hope after praying.

_Heavenly Father,_ he began,_ I am grateful for everything you have given me. You have given me a home, you have given me a loving sister and brother, and you have given me the freedom to pursue my dreams and my happiness. _

_Please, guide me and give me the knowledge to help me fulfill the destiny you have given me. I am afraid to disappoint you even more than I already have. _

_Whatever you will ask of me, I will do, and whatever punishment you have for me I will accept. _

_In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen._

As he looked up he saw his aunt standing next to him. She had a mild smile on her face, and she was looking at the full-size Jesus figure at the very end of the church. He wondered how long she had been standing there, but decided he didn't care. She always had that look on her face after praying, like nothing in the world was wrong anymore.

"Are you ready to go, Aunt Olivia?"

She looked at him and smiled. Then she nodded and he got up.

"Do you want to go anywhere for lunch, Alexander? It's on me."

He hadn't noticed how hungry he was before she mentioned food. His stomach growled, and his aunt laughed quietly and started walking out of the church. "I'll take that as a yes."

He smiled and followed her. She was a wonderful woman. That would always be a fact. She had always been his favorite family member besides Isabelle and Jace. One moment she was the overly religious type, and the next she was just … his aunt.

* * *

It was almost 12 o'clock when I walked by the little café where I had talked to Alec a couple times before. I didn't expect him to be there. He had told me last night that he was going to church. I had spent the night at his place again last night, and he was gone before I woke up.

I hadn't expected him to be there when I woke up; I knew he had to leave early for church, and that it would most definitely be before I woke up. But to be honest, I was a little sad when I finally did wake up. I missed waking up in his arms and snuggling closer to him and fall asleep again. I missed seeing the smile on his innocent face when he was sleeping, and I missed his quiet snoring.

But there he was, at the café. He was turned towards me, and there was a woman sitting on the other side of the table. Alec was smiling at her and talking calmly to her. He seemed really happy, comfortable around her. Not as nervous as he usually seemed around everyone. It was strange, seeing him that way, but not in a bad way. He seemed more grown up; he didn't look like a shy child anymore. And yet he still managed to keep that adorable innocent look on his face.

I started walking towards them, but stopped a few feet away. He hadn't spotted me yet, that's not it. I heard their conversation.

"Father William said I should pray every day. The thing is, I don't know if I want to change it. I'm… happy. At least for now."

She laughed a sweet, quiet laugh.

"You talked that way when you had just met Scott, as well. Have you met someone new? Who are you crazy about now?"

He blushed deep red and looked down at the table, but the smile not leaving his face. It seemed like one of those smiles, where you're thinking about something, and you just can't help but smile, because it just … makes you happy. I smiled a bit, just looking at that smile. He looked up as he was talking to her.

"It's just this guy. I met him a few weeks ago … Oh, Aunt Olivia, he's just so amazing. He's beautiful, and he's sweet, and kind, and he's just … perfect. I never thought I could fall for a guy like him, but he's everything I can think about. He wears tight clothes and sparkles, and he uses make-up, and everything I never liked. But on him it's just … amazing, Aunt Olivia."

My smile grew wider and wider as I realized he was talking about me. I never thought I'd hear him say all those things about me. I couldn't see Olivia's face, but I could hear the smile in her voice when she said,

"You seem really smitten, Alexander. Does he like you back?"

Alec started biting his lip and looked down at the table again, still blushing. He wasn't smiling anymore. I felt my heart drop as he started talking.

"I don't know. He flirts with me, and he says he likes me and gives me compliments all the time. But I just … I don't know. Sometimes he's just_ too_ blunt for it to be real."

"Now Alexander, don't expect him to be like everyone you've ever met. Some people just aren't that shy, and certainly not as shy as you are. I'm sure he likes you. He's just different."

I wanted to kiss her for telling him that. Because she was completely right. I was different, and not as shy as other people. I thought he knew.

"It's just… why should he like me, Aunt Olivia? You know what he wears, and I'm the complete opposite of him. He's amazing, and I really like him, but there's no reason he should like me. Just look at me."

"Now don't you talk like that, Alexander. I won't have it. You are amazing too, whether you can see it or not."

I smiled a bit, but then realized I had to go. I had a fotoshoot in two hours, and I needed to be there early. So I had to leave, had to miss his answer. But I couldn't stop thinking about how he talked about me. I had a giant knot in my stomach, thinking about how he saw himself. _He _was amazing. Not me.

I couldn't stop smiling for more than 2 hours. The photographer hated me for it. It was supposed to be serious, and I just couldn't stop smiling.

For once, I didn't even care about what the photographer thought.

* * *

**AN: Hi there. Yeah, I know it's been too long, but my life has just been absolute chaos, so I'm not even going to say anything. **

**Anyway, I kinda like this chapter. **

**Review and tell me what you think! And because it's been so long, you're allowed to yell at me for taking so long, too. ):**

**Sorryyyy! **


	12. Chapter 12

As soon as the photographer said I could leave, I quickly left the building and started walking to Alec's place. Today was not one of those days when I would just let him stay in. I wanted him to get out of the apartment, start to get over Scott and see that life does go on even without him. But of course, he couldn't go out into the nightlife in that wardrobe of his…

I opened the door, and walked directly to the couch where he was sitting and watching something on the TV. I took the remote from the table and turned off the TV, then taking his hand and pulled at his arm, so he sat up.

"Come on, Alexander. We need to go before the stores close."

He looked strangely, confused, at me, but stood up. "Where are we going?"

"We are going out tonight, so you have to get some new clothes. You can't wear … _that_."

"Going out? Wh-" he started, but I interrupted him before he got any further. I couldn't help but laugh as I said,

"Not like that, Alec. We're just going to go get something to eat, and then I'm taking you somewhere. Just like friends, I promise. Now come on, as I said, you can't wear _that_."

"Magnus, I can't afford new clothes. I can barely afford living here and eating proper food."

"Don't worry about that. It's my treat."

"I can't just take your money like that, you know that."

"Technically, you won't be. You'll be taking clothes I bought _for you_. It's a present. It's rude not to accept presents."

He looked doubtingly at me, but went to put on his shoes and his jacket. I grinned and followed him out.

"Oh, why didn't you take your car when you left for work this morning? I noticed it was there when I got home."

"I just needed some fresh air. We'll take it now, though, the stores close in two hours, and we need to be done by then."

"Clothes shopping do not take two hours, Magnus."

I grabbed his shoulder and pulled him closer, kissing his forehead quickly. "That's cute, darling, but please do remember, you haven't been shopping with _me_ before."

He pushed me away, laughing quietly. We got into my car and drove to my favorite store. It was a small shop with the most fantastic items. All my favorite clothes and shoes were from that store. It was called Highway Fashion, and was right on the outskirts of the town, so it took a while to get there. Luckily, it was in a small part of town with a bunch of other fantastic stores, so we could just walk around there for an hour or an hour and a half. We got out of the car and I lead the way to the small shop.

"This place? You take me to this place? _Really?_"

"What's wrong with this place? I got all my favorite clothes from here."

"This is one of Izzy's friends' store, Magnus."

"_Really?!_ You have got to introduce me to the owner, then! Please, Alec, please!" I begged. He was grinning at me, trying not to laugh. "Pleaseeee!"

"Fine, I'll introduce you sometime. Now, do you want to go in or not?"

I grabbed his hand and pulled him inside the store with me. As always, the atmosphere was wonderful in there. Everyone was happy, the staff was joking around while working, and it was just so lovely decorated. He smiled, probably at the familiar interior.

"I was thinking something blue, to show off your beautiful eyes," I said while walking to one of the shelves on the wall. He sighed and followed me to the shelf – which held mostly blue stuff. Most of the store was color coded; making it easy to find what you wanted in the color you wanted. I looked through some of the shirts on the shelf, and decided nothing really showed off his eyes like they deserved to be. So I moved on to the next shelf.

"How long is this going to take, Magnus?"

"At least until I find something to show off your eyes and your abs. We need a pair of pants for tonight, to show off your soccer muscles. You play soccer, right?"

"Uh… I did in school, but... yeah…"

"Well, we need to let people see that, because soccer muscles are just _yum_. And your abs are wonderful, so we'll have to show them off, too. And of course, you can't just have one day's wonderful clothes. You have to have an entirely new wardrobe. Let's see. Oh, here's a shirt that would look dashing on you."

"A new wardrobe? God, Magnus… You can't just buy me a new wardrobe."

"Of course I can. Now, go try this on. I'll come over to the changing room with a pair of jeans in a few minutes. Just wait for me."

I pushed the shirt in my hand into his. It was a t-shirt, midnight blue, and with sparkles on it, so it looked like the night sky. There was also something on it, different scales of blue and gray, so it looked like clouds were on it. It was absolutely stunning. He sighed and took it as he walked past me to get to the changing rooms. I searched for a pair of jeans for a few minutes, and decided on a black pair of tight jeans. I walked over to the changing room.

"Alexander?"

He put out his hand from one of the changing rooms, and I put the jeans in his hand. I waited for a bit, but quickly grew impatient.

"Come on, I want to see you!"

I pushed the curtain to the side, and stared at him. He looked fantastic. When he turned towards me, the blue t-shirt matched his eyes perfectly. His abs was clearly visible, since the t-shirt was _very _tight. His soccer muscles in his thighs were shown off perfectly as well. And while putting on the shirt, his hair had been ruffled, so it looked perfect. I couldn't stop staring at him.

"I don't know about this, Magnus, I look silly."

For a moment I couldn't even say anything.

"Are you kidding me! You look absolutely stunning!"

He blushed deeply and looked in the mirror again. He turned his side to the mirror, and in that shirt, it was clear how skinny he was. He was absolutely gorgeous.

"Not really… But I guess if you like it…"

"I love it, don't even think about not wearing that ever again. I'm buying you that outfit. I'll find something to match your blush, too, that'll look perfect. Sit down, wait here. I'll be back in just a minute."

"Magnus wait," he said as I tuned away. I turned back towards him and looked at him. He turned to face me again and looked me in the eyes. "Why do you insist on doing this? Buying me clothes and taking me somewhere later. You don't have to spend all your money on me. There's no reason to. I've been doing just fine before, and I don't want you to think I only care about your money."

"Oh hush, Alexander. I'm not spending all my money at all. I got plenty. And besides, if I'm to be seen with you, which I highly expect, I would prefer if you looked just as dashing as you can. You tend to hide it in those baggy old clothes. As for taking you out, I love being with you, and we can't just always do the same thing and watch movies. Now, I'll go find something to match that adorable blush of yours and a bunch of other things, and we'll head back to your place so we can get ready, and then we're leaving."

* * *

An hour and a half later, we had seven new shirts and three pairs of jeans and several pairs of shoes and boots in 6 bags, which we sat down on the couch in Alec's living room. Alec had been sleeping most of the way home, and now that he had just woken up, he looked so sweet I could barely keep my hands to myself. Even if he was wearing his old clothes.

"Go get changed. Wear the blue shirt I found for you at first, the one with the stars. And the black pair of jeans. I'll decide what shoes you should wear when I can see it on you. I'll help you do your hair, and your make-up of course."

"Make-up?! Magnus, I am not wearing make-up!"

I chuckled quietly and smiled at him. "That's so cute. You think you have a choice. Go get changed, darling."

I kissed him quickly on the cheek. He blushed deep red and turned away; taking one of the bags with the clothes I'd told him to wear, and walking to the bathroom to change while murmuring curses at me. I couldn't help but smile at him. I went to his bedroom, where I had a few items of clothing, including my orange, sparkly of course, deep v-neck t-shirt, which would be perfect for tonight. I was already wearing a pair of black, skin tight, leather pants that made my ass look amazing, and I decided to keep them on. When I walked out from the bedroom, and into the living room, Alec was sitting in the couch, looking _almost _perfect. If he just wore some make-up and did his hair every once in a while, he would be turning heads everywhere he went.

He looked up as I entered the room, and then looked down at himself. He blushed deep red and looked at his feet. I smiled widely at him. "You know, if you just did something for your appearance every now and then, you'd be wanted by everyone."

He snorted ironically, "Yeah, right."

"It's true. But we're not going to talk about that now, we're going to do your hair and make-up, and then I'll be doing mine. Come along, now."

He got up and followed me to the bathroom, where I had an almost complete stash of make-up. It was too bad I didn't have any foundation that would fit his skin tone, but I did have eyeliner, mascara and eye shadow. When he first saw them, he looked like I was a maniac standing in front of him with an axe, about to chop off his head, but after a little while, I got him convinced. Several failed attempts to apply eyeliner to his eyes, tons of tears because he moved or I moved or because he merely couldn't help it, tons of different layers of mascara and different color eye shadows, and uncountable different hairstyles, he looked absolutely amazing. The light blue, almost white, eye shadow did wonders for his eyes, and his hair was ruffled but controlled. He looked just the way I wanted him to.

"Now look in the mirror, and tell me you don't look fantastic."

He looked into the mirror like I had told him to do, and went completely silent. After a few seconds I got worried he didn't like it, but then a small smile starting tugging at his lips. It quickly grew wider and then he looked at me, really smiling.

"How did you do this, Magnus?"

I smiled at him. "I told you, you're beautiful. You just need to show it off."

He looked back in the mirror. He looked like he couldn't believe he was looking at himself. I couldn't stop smiling. He looked absolutely fabulous, and now he could actually see it.

"Now, love, get out. I need to do _my _hair and make it up. It won't take long, though."

He sighed and got up. He looked at me and smiled, grabbed my arm and pulled me in for a kiss. I immediately leaned into the kiss, and his tongue instantly started exploring my mouth, without me even giving him permission to do so. I didn't care, though. Our tongues quickly started moving together, and I put my hand behind his neck, pulling him even closer. I quickly pulled away though, realizing I'd ruin his hair if we continued this. He looked me in the eyes and smiled at me.

"You're amazing, you know that? Have I told you that?" he said quietly, not letting go of my arm.

"You're not so bad yourself, my love. Now go before we ruin your beautiful hair or make-up, I worked hard on that."

He smiled, nodded, and then left the bathroom. I quickly finished my make-up and my hair, and went to the living room to see him sitting in the couch with his phone. It looked like he was texting. That's weird.

"Who are you texting?"

"Scott. He wants me to come see him."

I looked at him. Before even thinking about it, I snatched his phone out of his hands, and quickly sat down next to him. "Smile, love," I said, and when he did so, I leaned close to him and looked into the camera. I took a picture of us and looked at it. We really did look good together when he was wearing make-up and his hair was done. You could also see his shirt in the picture, the sparkles shimmering in the light from the window. I smiled and showed him the picture. He looked at me. "What's that for?"

"Oh you'll see." I sent it to Scott with a message saying, 'Sorry, love, we got plans tonight!'. As soon as Alec saw what I did, his smile fell.

"I know you don't like him, Magnus, but…"

"No buts. You need to get over him, so you can't just run back to him every time he asks you to do so. You irresistible, so I don't blame him for wanting you back, but seriously, Alexander, you're way too good for him."

He nodded a bit; then started smiling. He never told me why, and it kept bugging me, but for now, we'd go have dinner, and I'd forget everything about Scott, and I could just enjoy my time with Alec. Just let go and focus on nothing but him.

Because who wouldn't?

* * *

**AN: Hi guys! I know there's a while between every update, and I'm sorry about that, but as I mentioned before, my life is absolute chaos. I hope that's okay.  
**

**Anyway, what do you guys think Magnus' plan is for the night? It's nothing big, so it's probably not hard to guess, but still. It could be fun to see if I'm _that_ predictable. **

**Reviews are love, my darlings! I hope you liked it!**

**AzOOAK**


	13. Chapter 13

_Scott was looking at him in that way again. With that special look, that only Scott could give him, it only meant something when Scott was the one who looked at him that way. It made Alec's heart melt and tied his stomach in a knot. He didn't want to say anything, afraid he'd say the wrong thing and he'd ruin everything. Instead he just looked away, blushing furiously once again. _

"_I have something for you, Alec."_

_Alec looked at him again. It was his birthday, sure, but he hadn't expected Scott to buy him anything. He didn't need anything. He just wanted to be with Scott. "Why?"_

_Scott couldn't help but laugh quietly. "Why? Because it's your birthday, silly. Here." He pulled a box like the ones you get rings in from his pocket and handed it to Alec, who took it in his hands but didn't open it. _

"_Scott… I- a ring? This is-" _

"_It's not an engagement ring, Alec. I just remembered you looking at the ring in the window and saying you loved it when we were in town a couple weeks ago, and I figured…" _

_Alec then finally opened the box, looking at the ring. It has a capital L on it, and was in a mat silver. There were flames carved in it, but not in the ugly fashion, it didn't look like it was a 7 year old boy who had drawn flames on it. It was beautiful. He looked at Scott. "Thank you, Scott."_

_Scott smiled shyly and looked at the ring. "You should tell people it's like your family ring or something. It has an L for Lightwood and everything." _

_Alec smiled and looked at him. Then his smile dropped. "I want to give you something. You spent all this money on me, and I don't have anything for you." _

"_It's _your_ birthday. You're not allowed to give me gifts today," Scott said, laughing. Alec couldn't help but smile at him. Scott's laugh was so wonderful and lit up his face. _

"_But I _want_ to give you something. I just don't know what."_

_They sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments, eyes locked together, as Alec was thinking. Finally, his smile picked back up and his eyes shimmered. He got up and went to find his jacket. He ruffled through the pockets for a moment, until finally finding what he had been looking for. He went back to Scott and looked at him, sitting back down. _

"_I know it's not much, and nothing compared to the ring, but it's something," he said, handing over the small item in his hand. Scott looked at him. _

"_A key?" _

"_A key to my apartment." _

_Scott stared at him. He couldn't believe it. Alec had just given him the key to his _apartment_. "But won't you need it?" _

"_This is the extra key. I want you to have it." _

_Scott just stared at him, making Alec feel uncomfortable. "You don't have to take it, I just-"_

"_Alec, you can't be serious about this, I- … A key to your apartment, I haven't earned that trust. Oh God, Alec, are you serious?" _

_Alec smirked, being proud of himself for having done something that showed how much he loved him. He had done something right for once. "Of course I'm serious, I love you. I can't imagine loving anyone else like this. I trust you more than anyone else."_

"_Well, then you need the key to my apartment, too. I don't have the extra key with me, so I'll bring it over later, okay?" _

"_Sure. Come by anytime." _

_Scott couldn't help but smile. He sat close to Alec on the couch, and Alec went to straddle his legs. Scott leaned in close and captured his lips, questioning, slowly. Alec put his arms around him and kissed him back. There was the explosion of feelings and passion and pleasure they always felt when they kissed. Scott put his hands at the small of Alec's back, pulling him as close as possible. He didn't want to let go, but soon he did just that. He gazed into Alec's blue eyes, the thing about Alec that had captured his attention at first._

"_I don't know what I'd do without you, baby," Scott whispered, just loud enough for Alec to hear him. _

_Alec just smiled and kissed him again._

* * *

His text message-tune sounded through the small room. He was sitting by the window, and had left his phone next to the couch, on the small table standing there with a lamp, and now, his phone. He got up and went to check it. He read the message before looking at the image in the text.

_**Sorry, love, we got plans tonight! **_

He figured Magnus must've typed it. Love was something he called people a lot, and a word Alec would never use in that sense. He then opened the image in the text, and stared.

It was a picture of Alec and Magnus, but all he saw was Alec. He was smiling, the way he used to _only_ smile when he was with Scott. He was wearing a beautiful t-shirt that made his eyes stand even more out. And he was wearing _make-up_ and his hair was styled perfectly.

_What have I done? _he thought. He had wanted Alec to come over so they could talk, and he could convince him that they were right for each other. It was stupid to let him go in the first place. Who wouldn't want him when he was free? And now _Magnus_ of all people had apparently gotten close to him.

He couldn't let this happen. If Magnus had made the plans, which he would have, 'cause Alec was not one to ever make plans for anything, Scott knew where they would go. And he wasn't going to leave them alone, to have their, 'special night'. Alec was _not_ going to fall for this prick. He was too good for Magnus. Way too good.

He went to find his keys and his jacket, and left in a hurry to go find them. He knew where Magnus was going to bring him, but he didn't know when. He just had to go there and wait for them.

He was not letting Magnus have this one.

* * *

**AN: Hey guys. **

**I know it's been really long, and I'm sorry, but I actually had this whole chapter written and all mid-december or something like that. But my computer decided to format (change itself back to the settings it had when I got it, and delete EVERYTHING. And I do mean EVERYTHING.) so I just kinda.. Lost my will to write. I feel horrible about it, but I just really had no inspiration or anything. **

**This chapter is very short, but it's mostly to get into things again. The chapter I had written was actually completely different, not involving Scott at all, and much longer. It wasn't that good, though, so I guess it's good I didn't publish that. **

**I hope you don't hate me too much. I still love all of you!**

**Please review guys! **


	14. The dreaded author's note

_AN:_

**_Hey guys!_**

**_I just wanted to update you on something, because well.. My life is a bit chaos right now. _**

**_I'm of course waiting for Clockwork Princess to get released. _**

**_And then I have decided to participate in Camp NaNoWriMo next month! Are any of you guys doing it? It's basically a virtual camp for writers, where you set yourself a word goal, and you have one month to reach this goal. You simply.. Write a novel in a month. You get divided into cabins and all that, so you have cabin mates too. My username on there is AzOOAK as well, if you want to find me. _**

**_That's of course taking a lot of my time, outlining the story and finding a cover and everything so it's ready to get started next month. Sometimes I'm really not sure if I'm a Planner or a Pantser. Which one are you? _**  
**_Just to be clear, a Planner is someone who makes a huge outline of the story and everything before starting it, and knows the climax, the plot twists, the ending, everything. The Pantser is someone who.. is just winging it. I think I might be a mix of the two, because I plan the bigger parts, but everything in between is just winging. _**  
**_My word goal is 50k words. I just hope I didn't set it too high. About 2000 words pr. day should be manageable. _**  
**_If you're doing it, what's your word goal? _**

**_And then I had my birthday friday the 15th, so I just spent that day with my family, and I went to a concert on saturday the 16th. Walk The Moon. And I spoke to them. And they wished me a happy (late) birthday. They signed my ticket and my cd as well. Life. Made. _**

**_So tell me a bit about what you've been up to if you want. I don't actually talk that much to you guys, and I should really start doing that. _**

**_I hope you don't hate me too much for posting an Authors Note! You know I'm sorry! I'll have the next chapter up as soon as possible, I swear. See ya around!_**

**_AzOOAK_**


	15. Chapter 14

"Magnus, would you tell me where we're going?"

They were in a cab Magnus called for them. They were in the back seat, Magnus in the middle seat. Alec was looking out of the window, trying to figure out where they were going, but he had no clue. They were driving through a part of town that was very close to the sea, so it was pretty windy outside, and it wasn't a part of town Alec spent much time in. Magnus smiled at him, looking at him to make sure he didn't ruin his hair or make up – speaking of that, he was leaning back and his hair almost touched the seat behind him.

"Hey, watch your hair, sweetheart," Magnus said, grabbing his should and softly pulling him a bit forward. "We'll be there soon enough, don't worry. You'll see where we're going."

Soon they stopped by a restaurant. It wasn't somewhere Alec had been before, so he was excited. Besides, the place was beautiful. It was a two story building with glass walls. It was round, and had walls in the middle, also in a circle, which was probably where the kitchen was. The floor looked like real hardwood, with a dark mahogany red look. The reception was outside, and behind the reception was a glass door to enter the main floor and a wooden staircase with a wooden banister. At the end of the stairs was another glass door, to enter the second floor. A balcony with wooden floor and banister was around the entire second floor, and there were four doors so that you could easily enter the balcony no matter where in the restaurant your table was. And as a bonus, the restaurant was just by the sea, so from the balcony another staircase led straight to the beach.

Alec got out of the cab and stared in disbelief. He'd read about the place in the news paper and online, and he'd seen pictures, and heard about it from other people, but he had never thought it'd be this beautiful. And other than that, he had never thought he would be eating here himself. He looked at Magnus, who had paid the cab driver and was now standing behind him.

"Magnus, there is no way I can afford to eat here."

"Don't worry. It's my treat." Magnus smiled at him, and he had that twinkle in his eyes again. He always had that twinkle when he looked at him, and he didn't know what it meant. He didn't notice that much now, though.

"There is no ways I am letting you pay for me on Riva del Fiume. There's just no way, Magnus."

"You can't stop me. Come on, you can pay the next time we go somewhere," Magnus said and started walking towards the reception.

Alec sighed, but followed him to the outdoors reception. There was a woman standing there with light brown hair and a slightly tanned skin. Alec guessed she was naturally pale, and had gotten the little tan from standing in the reception here. She wore glasses on her nose – they were sat that way you associate with old people. Perfectly for reading when they're looking down, and they can look above the glasses too. Her hair was in a ponytail and it had a bit of curls you wouldn't notice at first.

"A table for two, plea-" Alec started, but Magnus interrupted.

"Actually, we have a reservation under Bane. Second floor, if I remember correctly," he said with a dashing smile to the receptionist who looked at her bookings list, and then smiled and asked them to follow her to their table. She led them up the stairs and to the table with the clearest view of the beach. They sat down, and a waiter immediately brought them menus. Alec opened the menu and glanced through the prices.

"Geez, Magnus, this is really expensive. Are you sure about this?"

Magnus calmly opened his menu and looked the courses through.

"Of course. I knew the price when I took you here, Alexander. Just relax and stop thinking about the price. I'm used to these prices; I'm a model for God's sake."

Alec blushed lightly. Of course it wasn't that expensive for Magnus – he was practically rich. He had a car, a nice apartment with nice furniture, he ate places like this. Of course Magnus wasn't concerned about the _price_.

"Speaking of modeling, didn't you have like... a catwalk thing tonight or something like that?"

Magnus grinned and looked up at him. "You're cute when you're trying to follow. It was moved. It's the day after tomorrow. You want to come?"

"Well, is it something I would actually buy?"

"Probably not."

"Is it something I would use if I ever got it?"

"Probably not."

"Well, is it at least something affordable?"

At that, Magnus smirked and pursed his lips a bit. "Alexander, it's fashion, and you can't afford to eat here. Do you really think you'd like _or _afford it?"

"Hey, I like fashion, I just don't have money."

"Who was looking like he was being forced to read the same kid's book ten times in a row when we went shopping earlier?"

Alec glared. "I did not."

Magnus smiled victoriously and went back to the menu. "Just come along, will you? For me?"

Alec sighed. "Will I have to fight for a seat to even see you?"

Magnus looked insulted. His golden green eyes went back to Alec's blue, and then he smiled sweetly. "Oh, Alexander dear, there'd be a big screen. But no, you wouldn't, because if you would just say you would come along, I could get you a seat."

"Fine, I'll come. But only to see you. What kind of clothes is it anyway?" Alec asked and took a sip of the water the water had brought them as soon as he had brought them their menus.

Magnus smirked. "Underwear."

Alec almost choked, but managed to swallow the water properly. "You're kidding, right?"

Magnus smiled sweetly and shook his head. "You promised to go, baby, and now there's no way around it. Now, what do you want to eat?"

Alec sighed and looked at the menu again. "How's the ravioli here?"

"It's divine, sir," said the waiter standing beside their table. He smiled at Alec. "May I take your orders?" Alec looked up at him and smiled lightly. The waiter was wearing a white button up shirt and white pants and a black vest over the shirt. This one had a pair of lovely brown eyes and dark brown hair; he was rather good looking, really. And he had a nice smile.

"I'll have the ravioli, then. And a coke."

"Nonsense, Alexander, we are having a nice red wine. And I'll have the risotto, thank you."

The waiter nodded at Magnus and turned back to Alec.

"Would you like me to bring you a coke along with the red wine, sir?"

Alec laughed softly. "Yes, that would be great, thank you…" – he glanced at the waiter's nametag and then looked back to his face– "Nicholas."

The waiter nodded, smiled and went into the kitchen.

Magnus looked at Alec. "See, I told you everyone would want you."

Alec looked shocked at him. "What? He was just being nice."

"You're kidding me, right? He was _so_ flirting with you."

"People can just be nice, Magnus."

Magnus just shook his head and smiled, and then looked out at the sea. "It's a great table I got us, huh?"

Alec looked out at the beach and the ocean and nodded. "It's really a beautiful place here. I still can't believe you actually brought me here."

Magnus smiled and looked at him. "Only the best is good enough for you."

The rest of the dinner went by quickly, with empty talks and Alec's quick chats with the waiter, Nicholas. Magnus would just sit with that smirk on his face every time they talked. Every time he left Alec would tell Magnus the same thing over and over –_ he's just being a nice person, Magnus _– and every time Magnus would just laugh at him and tell him he wouldn't know flirting if it fell from the sky and hit him in the face.

* * *

_**AN: **_

_**Hey guys! So I see you don't hate me for the author's note, that's great. This chapter isn't long, and there was absolutely nothing exciting about it, it was really just dialogue most of it. But I wanted to update, and it didn't get to be that long because I'm doing Camp NaNoWriMo, and it's just like, really, really stressful at times. **_

_**But I hope you liked the chapter! Review and tell me! **_


	16. Chapter 15

"Hey, take a look," I said and pointed behind him, out the window/glass wall.

We were in the middle of dessert now, and Alec had agreed to have something unhealthy for once in his life. He had a chocolate mousse, but it didn't seem like he was very fond of the taste nor the calories in it. It was obvious he'd kept from these things for years, on his body too.

I was now looking at the sunset. The sky was red, and the clouds around the sun made it look like a lightning had parted them and only just let the striking red shine through in a narrow line, shaped like a lightning. He looked over his shoulder, at froze in the motion. I couldn't see his face, he was turned away from me now, but I guess it was just because it was beautiful. He turned back to me and smiled at me.

"It's beautiful, Magnus."

We finished the dessert in peace, and the waiter brought us the bill. I paid, of course, even though Alec didn't look too happy about it. I just smiled and said that he could pay the next time if he was that worried about it. Then we went outside on the balcony and looked out on the sea. Alec was leaning on the banister, with his arms folded and on the banister. I rested my one hand on the banister and looked out at the sea. We stood there in silence for a few moments.

"Alec, why do you work in that bookstore?"

He glanced at me, surprised, but then looked out again. "Why wouldn't I? It's a nice place, it allows me to take it easy and I'm surrounded by books."

"Yes, but Alec, you can barely afford your food on a daily basis, much less go out and have fun. It's really limiting what you can do."

He shrugged. "Do I really need more money than what I use on food and rent? I don't ever do anything. Not unless you or Scott dragged me out, at least."

"What would you like to do? What's your dream?"

At that he looked down and started biting his bottom lip. One of his hands started playing with the fabric of the sleeve on the other arm. "It doesn't matter," he said quietly. "I'm no good at it, it won't happen. I've given up on it years ago."

"What is it? You can tell me, Alec."

"I would like to... I would like to be an author… or an artist."

"Really? Have you tried publishing any books? Showing someone your art?"

He shook his head. "Magnus, I told you I'm no good at it. I mean it. No one would like my writing, or my art."

"Have you tried showing anyone?"

"Well, no..."

"Then how do you know they won't like it? Can I read one of your books?"

"Magnus, no," he looked up at me and looked straight into my eyes. I'd almost forgotten how beautiful his eyes were.

"Why not?"

"I told you, they're not good."

"Let me read the best one."

He sighed, fiddling with the fabric still. "Fine. But promise me you won't laugh at me."

"I would never laugh at you, Alexander."

"Fine. You can read one. _One, _Magnus. Just one. Now, where did you want us to go? You said you had the night planned."

"Well," I said, smiling. "I was thinking we could go watch a movie, and then we're going clubbing."

He narrowed his eyes at me. Why was he so suspicious of me all the time? I never did anything wrong… okay, maybe I did, but still. "What movie?"

"Well, they just released The Lion King in 3D…."

He smiled brightly. "You really want to watch a Disney movie?"

"Well yeah. Of course, it's Disney. You do too, right?"

"Sure, Magnus. Sure."

* * *

They had to be here. Where else would Magnus bring him? They _had_ to be here. Scott _knew _him, he _knew _this would be where he brought Alec. So why weren't they here? But Scott had been through the entire space twice, and was now working his way through the third, but they were definitely not there.

Surely Magnus hadn't changed that much since back then? And then again, what if he had? What if Alec had been the cause of the change, just like he had for Scott?

He went outside to get some air. That's when he heard them. They were laughing and joking, and they were _holding hands._ Alec hadn't even wanted to hold Scott's for so much longer than this. He crossed the street to the side they were on; they were standing outside the movie theater. He went behind them, to the back of the line, as soon as he'd overheard Magnus ask for tickets for The Lion King in 3D. Alec had never wanted to watch that with Scott.

He got his ticket when it was his turn, and he went outside. His seat was right behind them, and he was happy, so he would be able to watch them. He wasn't going to let Magnus get away with what he did to Scott those years ago, and then let him have Alec. There was just no way.

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Hey guys! So I decided to give you guys an extra, short, chapter for putting up with me over the past months. I'm not completely happy with it, but it's alright. And you see that bottom part, where Scott goes _**_He wasn't going to let Magnus get away with what he did to Scott those years ago, and then let him have Alec**? Yeah, you'll hear about that later on. **_

_**For now though, review and tell me what you think - maybe you can guilt me into updating soon. -Hint hint- **_

_**AzOOAK**_


	17. Chapter 16

After the movie, Alec and I went outside. He hadn't even watched The Lion King before, so it was a good thing that I'd brought him. He was smiling, and he was holding my hand. He was _really_ holding my hand – intertwined fingers and everything.

"Did you like it?"

The voice came from behind us, but I knew who it was. It couldn't be anyone else than him. Were we really not even allowed to have _one_ night together without him being a subject in the conversation, or him being there? It had been such a nice night, without talking about Scott, but I guess he wasn't happy with that.

Alec turned around to look at him, and he stared. I turned, and stopped dead in the movement. Scott looked like crap. His hair looked like he hadn't showered for days, he had dark shadows under his eyes, which were red from crying, I might add. He was wearing an oversize white sweatshirt, but he still looked thinner than he had the last time I saw him, and a pair of dark grey jogging pants. He had his jacket over his arm.

Alec looked completely shocked.

"Scott, I-"

"Did you _like the movie_?"

"I… Yes, I liked it." Alec was speaking in a low voice, and at first I wasn't sure Scott had heard him. He was just standing there, staring at him, looking so broken. Did I really do that to him?

"You never wanted to watch it with me. You never let me decide what movie to watch if it wasn't one you had seen before."

"Scott…"

"Why is everything so different with him? What does he have that I can't give you, Alec? I _love you_, and this guy is just stringing you along until someone better comes along. I'd do anything for you, don't you know that?"

"Scott, we're just-"

"I don't want to hear you say you're _just friends_. You're holding his hand, Alec. Remember how long it took before you were comfortable holding my hand? What was I to you, Alec? Someone to use to give the gay-thing a try with until you'd be brave enough to tell everyone? You just used me like a test drive, right?"

That's when Scott started crying. Tears spilled out of his eyes and stained his shirt where they dropped. He turned halfway, looking away from Alec as if he was ashamed. Knowing Alec, I knew he was going to do it before he even moved. He let go of my hand and stood closer to Scott, putting his hand on Scott's shoulder.

"I would never do that, Scott. You think I'm over you just like that? Scott, I think about you every single day, and sometimes I just want to let it all out and cry like a baby, and I want to go to your place and scream and shout at you for dumping me. Because, God, Scott I love you. I still love you so much it hurts, but," – the first tear spilled, his voice broke, and now Alec was crying too – "but you let me go. I know you just wanted to give it a little time, Scott, I know, but I can't handle it. I can't sit around every day hoping you'll call me to make up with me. And now, now you're talking like I'm the one who dumped you. Scott, this isn't my fault. And it isn't Magnus' either, for the record."

Scott looked up at me, briefly, and then looked at Alec. "How can you say it's not his fault? It's _all_ his fault! He's the one who started all this! God, if it hadn't been for him, we would still be together, Alec. We'd still be in love. I know I'm not good enough for you, but I thought we'd at _least_ last for two years. We'd just hit one! I just wanted to be with you, and let everyone see that I _did_ have a chance with someone this amazing and beautiful."

"You said it was getting too serious-"

"I was scared! If I didn't let you go as soon as possible, you'd dump me, or I'd find you in bed with Magnus, and you'd be so in love with him, because that's what he does, Alec. I know that what he does. I've lost guys to him before, and you are just so much more to me than they ever were, and that hurt enough back then. I didn't know if I could bear losing you to him, and look where it got me."

Alec kissed him, and I felt a knot in my stomach. I'd worked so hard to make him forget Scott, and now he was _kissing _him. I could see their tears mixing together on their cheeks, and I could see them both breaking even more over this simple gesture. Scott was just standing there at first, carefully trying not to push him away, as if trying not to scare him. Their eyes were closed. Then Scott put his arms around his waist, and pulled away. Alec opened his eyes and looked at him. Scott leaned his forehead on Alec's, not opening his eyes, just continuing to cry.

"God, Alec," he whispered, and finally opened his eyes halfway. "I can't believe I let you go."

Alec slowly pulled away, cause Scott to pick up his head and look at him. "I'm sorry, Scott, but I just can't get back with you now. It's gone too far now. It's been too long."

Scott nodded slowly, looking away. Alec had stopped crying, but Scott hadn't. He had let Alec go, and he was now holding himself, as if he was cold. Now he looked at Alec again.

"I really do love you, Alec…"

Alec found his keys in his pocket and took one out of the key ring and handed it to Scott. "I know, Scott." Seeing the key being handed to him, Scott choked back another sob. I supposed it was the key to his apartment, one that Alec wouldn't need now. "Bring my key sometime. Just… put it in the mailbox or something. You don't have to come in. It would hurt too much."

And with those words, Alec wiped his tears away with his right sleeve and turned back to me. He took my hand, and started walking. I immediately followed him.

"Are you okay?"

He shook his head, but didn't take his eyes off the ground. "Is it okay if I just go home by myself? I want to be alone tonight."

I nodded, taking the lead and walking to a taxi parking space a bit away. "Of course. There's a taxi here. I'll take the cab with you, and we'll get you home first, and then I'll just go home. You ruined your make up anyway."

He tried to smile, but it just turned out as another broken sob escaping him without his permission. I just wanted to get him home now, and give him a bit of space.

* * *

**_AN:_**

**_Hey guys! So I updated pretty quickly, even if it was a few days after the last one (you know, considering it's me, it IS pretty quickly). I guess the guilt thing worked? _**

**_But I really did feel a bit more inspired, and I_**_ wanted_ **_to update for you guys. And thanks for the reviews! I was really happy about them. _**

**_I hope you like this chapter - a bit short, but I guess you can cope with shorter chapters, if they come out a bit more often, right?  
Review and tell me what you thought - and seeing as the guilt thing worked, maybe you should just keep doing that... _**

**_AzOOAK _**

**_(Also, if you want to hear from me a bit more often, you can follow me on Tumblr. I have the same username there as here - azooak - and it's basically TMI/TID/Doctor Who/funny stuff I post and reblog, so check it out if you feel like it)_**


	18. Author's Note (please don't kill me)

_**Hey guys!**_

_**Author's note again, I'm really sorry, but I need to do this. I heard what's going on in Boston! Did you?**_

_**If you're from Boston, message me so I know you're okay! I do worry about you guys!**_

_**Like really, if you're from Boston, or you're in Boston, or NEAR Boston, tell me you're okay. I really need to know this. **_

_**I'll update sometime tomorrow, I hope! I also have some essays, so I'll need to finish those first, but it's only two and I'm nearly done. So I'll see you tomorrow.**_

_**And basically, what I tried to say with this is that I'm really worried something happened to some of you guys, so**__ please __**message me if you're near Boston, I'm begging you.**_

**_AzOOAK_**


	19. Chapter 17

The weather was grey today. It wasn't sunny, it didn't rain it was just … grey. Sometimes I wondered if it automatically matched his mood, but of course that was ridiculous – if anything, his mood matched the weather, not the other way around.

He had called me earlier. Telling me he met Scott last night, and everything that'd happened. How he'd talked to him, trying to keep calm, how he hadn't been able to, so he started crying, how he'd kissed him, and finally how he had given him back his key. He just sounded so broken, and I'd ended up promising him to come and visit him today.

And that was how I ended up in the backseat of a yellow cab, on my way to his place. The cab smelled like someone had brought an entire farm in here, and after that someone else had brought fried chicken. I hadn't been happy about it, but it was the only free cab at the train station. Now the cab driver was pulling up by the big apartment building, and I paid him, got my things and stepped out of the cab. I'd brought nothing but a large sports bag for some of my clothes; I always stayed for a while, but I usually washed my clothes a couple times during my stay, so not much clothes was needed.

I stepped into the hall, and started walking up the stairs, until I was finally standing by the door made from dark wood. I knocked on the door a few times, waiting for it to open. After a moment too long – in which I was considering if I should knock again or try calling him – the door slowly opened, hesitantly. As soon as he saw me, though, he ripped the door open and flung himself into my arms. He was still sobbing, I noticed as I put my arms around him.

"Thank you so much for coming, I know it's a huge bother, I'm sorry," he whispered almost inaudibly and clung even closer to my chest.

"Never be sorry for being sad, Alec. He's the one who should be sorry. Are you feeling a bit better?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer. Sure enough, he shook his head slowly. "C'mon, then, let's go inside. I brought some things to cheer you up," I said and loosened my grip around his shoulders. He let go and offered me a half-hearted smile.

I pushed past him and walked into the apartment, which pretty much looked the same it always did. He followed me and closed the door behind him, walked directly back to the couch. I walked over to one of the armchairs I'd gotten him when he moved in. He'd insisted it was too much, but I'd insisted he kept it. I placed my sports bag in the chair and opened the zipper in the top, opening the middle room. Searching through it for a bit, I finally found what I was looking for, and pulled up a DVD-box of the fifth season of Doctor Who. He looked at me and smiled – faintly, but real.

"Go put some water on, will you?"

He nodded and got up, leaving the room to walk to the kitchen and put some water on. I pulled up some creamy hot chocolate mix, and next some ice cream – Ben & Jerry's cookie dough, seeing as that was the only ice cream I could persuade him to eat. Honestly, who would ever be able to resist cookie dough ice cream? The next thing I pulled out from the bag wasn't something we'd use immediately. But knowing us, we'd get there in not too long. It was a bottle of white rum, real Cuban rum. I bought it when I was on Cuba a few months back.

He soon returned with two cups with a teaspoon in each and a pot of almost boiling water. I smiled at him as he looked over the things I'd brought, seemingly approving of everything but the rum. I knew he wouldn't agree on the rum, he never did, but we always ended up drinking almost the entire bottle. That's the way it always went, and I had a feeling the rum would be opened way faster today than it usually did.

"Mix the hot chocolate, I'll put on the DVD," I said, opening the DVD-box and taking out the first disc. He first picked up the remote, turning on the DVD-player (which would probably be useful if we wanted to watch anything), and then turned on the TV, switching to the DVD-setting. Then he proceeded to mix the hot chocolate in both cups as I popped the disc in the player. I then went back to sit in the armchair turned towards the TV as he handed me one of the cups. I smiled and took it.

I looked at him and didn't notice until now what he was wearing and what he looked like. He was wearing pajamas pants, blue of course, and a black t-shirt, along with an oversized open sweatshirt that almost drowned him in the fabric. He had red eyes from crying and he looked like he'd barely slept. I sucked in a breath, but I don't think he noticed it as he was reaching for the ice cream while turning on the first episode of the season. I turned against the TV again and lost myself in the fantastic adventures of the Doctor.

* * *

"And the worst part is, he thinks all of it is my fault! I didn't do shit to him! He's the one who broke up with me! Yes, Magnus wanted to fuck me, but that's not my fault! I kept saying no to him!" Alec ranted on and took another swig of the bottle of rum. He'd been drinking for a little while now, and his face was turning red, and his eyes a little glassy. "Magnus is sexy as fuck, yeah? Doesn't it tell him something that I _kept saying no_?" Another swig of the bottle. He handed it over to me and I took a long sip of it. No matter how much I like the effect of it, I would never get used to the taste of pure rum – Alec didn't seem to mind too much, though.

"Alec, of course he's going to be hurt that you're spending time with a guy who's done something like that to him-"

"Well, if he was so fucking scared, he could've told me. I'm so sick of dealing with his shit. I mean, seriously! I've had friends, hot and sexy friends, like you, for years and he doesn't mind, but as soon as someone he's got the least of a background with, bam, trust, gone!" I handed him the bottle and he took a long swig, almost emptying it. "I don't feel so… good…" he mumbled.

I got up, swaying slightly – well, slightly as far as I could tell – as I walked over to the couch, sitting in a corner. "Come here, then."

He scooted a bit closer to me, leaning against me and resting his head on my chest. His breath smelled _heavily _of alcohol, I could smell it from here. He shifted his weight a few times, trying to get comfortable and finally found a spot, with his head on my shoulder and his face turned against me, so his lips was about maybe an inch from my throat. His breath tickled me lightly, but I didn't want to push him away.

"I really am glad you came, you know." He spoke softly, and I smiled as his breath tickled me again.

"I don't mind. I missed you," I whispered and started stroking his hair soothingly. When he spoke again, he sounded like he was on the edge of falling asleep, and he probably was, too.

"I missed you too, Jem. Don't ever stay away for so long again."

I smiled, kissing his forehead lightly as his breathing slowed and he fell asleep. "I won't. I promise."

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Hey guuuyyyys. So I updated. Ain't that nice? _**

**_It got a little late, the essays took longer than I expected, but here you go. A chapteeeer! And a long one of that. Out the latest, at least. _**

**_I hope you liked it, and I hope you don't mind me bringing Jem into the story. I'm considering if I should put it in the crossover section now, because Jem is here, but it's only going to be Jem, so I don't think I will. _**

**_I hope you liked it! _**

**_Azooak_**


	20. Chapter 18

When I woke up the next morning, still on the couch, Alec had gotten up already. It had been recently though, because he just came out of the shower – his hair was wet and he hadn't put on a shirt yet, so he was just wearing a pair of jeans. I stared for a moment – this was wrong.

"Alec, are you wearing _skinny jeans?_"

He looked over at me and blushed. "Magnus got them for me. Don't you like them?" he asked quietly and looked away. I nodded reassuringly, but then realized he couldn't see me.

"They look nice on you. But seriously, Magnus got you to wear skinny jeans? Geez, no wonder Scott was jealous. You obviously like the guy."

He looked at me and stared for a moment, before he shook his head slowly, looking down at the shirt he had in his hand – a blue one. He put it on and then looked at me again. "He wanted to buy me clothes, and he didn't take a no for an answer…"

I shook my head and then realized I had a bad headache. I got up and pulled my t-shirt off. "You keep telling yourself that, Alec. Will you put my shirt in the wash? I'll go check the post." He nodded and I tossed him my shirt. He caught the shirt and walked out to the bathroom.

I walked over to the chair, where my bag was still sitting. I opened one of the side rooms and pulled out a white long sleeved shirt. I put it on and walked over to the dresser that was standing by the wall, where I know he had the key for his mailbox. I then walked out the door and down the stairs to get to the mailboxes, placed in the bottom of the building – right at the entrance. I rounded the corner to get to the mailboxes, only to see a man with blond hair and pale skin standing there, putting something in Alec's mailbox.

"Scott."

He looked like he was caught off guard, and quickly spun to look at me. "What are _you _doing here? I thought you were in Milano."

"I was. Alec called me and told me how much of an ass you were being. Can't you just leave? I really don't need this while I have a hangover."

"You guys were drinking," he stated the obvious. I hated when he did that. "What else were you doing? Please tell me you didn't…"

"No, Scott, we didn't. Now can you leave? I have a crazy headache."

He was about to answer, but before he did, something behind me caught his eye. I turned around to see Alec standing a bit behind me, looking directly at Scott. I hadn't even heard his footsteps.

"What are you doing here?" he spoke softly, in a low voice. It was barely above whispering, his eyes locked with Scott's.

"I was just... bringing over your key. I've got a few things you left at my place in my car. I was going to bring them over sometime, but I guess you can just have them now, then." It was obvious in his voice he was trying desperately to keep control. He didn't want to cry in front of Alec. _Again._

"I guess… How much is it, maybe Jem shou-"

"Don't you miss me?" He spoke so suddenly, it almost seemed to surprise himself. His eyes were a bit wide, and he bit his bottom lip.

"Of course I do, Scott."

The next thing I knew, Scott had closed the – rather long – distance between himself and Alec, and Scott was kissing him. Alec had open eyes, staring up at Scott, until he eventually closed them and relaxed against Scott. Their lips moved together like it was the most natural thing in the world, easier than breathing, until they eventually broke apart.

"Don't tell me you didn't feel it, Alec. You can't deny it. And you know we belong together."

"Scott, don't …"

"Alec, please don't do this. I love you so much, I need you. I need you so bad. I don't know how to function without you, please don't do this."

I walked to them and grabbed Scott's arm. I pulled him a little away from Alec and pushed him a bit further. "You need to back off. He told you no. If you loved him, you'd respect him enough to leave him alone when he's asked you to. If he wants any more to do with you, he'll call you. For now, I'll walk to your car with you, get Alec's stuff and watch you drive away. Now come on."

I started walked, and watching closely if he followed me – he didn't dare do anything else. We walked to the door to the parking lot, Scott keeping his eyes on Alec for as long as he could, trying his best with the puppy eyes. As soon as we got outside, we walked to his car and I stopped beside it.

"You need to back off, Scott. He doesn't need this from you. Don't you think it's hard enough for him as it is? Leave him alone."

He didn't answer, just unlocked the car and started giving me Alec's things. There were two boxes, not too big, with clothes and whatnot. They were easy to carry, not very heavy, and I stood back and watched him drive away. I walked back, to see that Alec had already walked back to his apartment. I got the post and put it on top of one of the boxes, and started walking up the stairs and into his apartment. He was sitting in the couch, already crying and trying to wipe them away. I put the boxes on top of the dresser and walked over to him.

"Do you have any more rum?"

"Alec, maybe we shouldn't…"

"Do you have any more rum, Jem?"

I sighed and walked over to my bag. I had another bottle; I'd brought it just in case. I pulled it up of the bag and walked over to him, handing him the bottle. He opened it and took a long sip, making the amount of rum in the bottle considerately decrease.

"I can't handle this, Jem. I can't keep saying no to him. I can't keep staying away from him or from Magnus for that matter. It's just too hard," he said and took another long sip. Right now his only intention was to get drunk and get away from all of this.

I didn't blame him.

* * *

Jem had gone to bed, trying to sleep away his headache, while Alec continued drinking. Not long after Jem had gone to bed, Alec got bored. And what do you do when you're bored?

"Magnus, get your sexy ass over here. I need ya."

Not long after, the door had opened after three hesitant knocks. Alec had gotten up, trying to walk over there, but only barely made it halfway because of him swaying. Magnus walked over to him, grabbing his shoulders and trying to steady him. Alec had smirked and looked him in the eyes, and Magnus had immediately caught on. He'd been drinking - a lot.

He didn't have long to think about it though, because Alec leaned in and kissed him as he brought his hands to rest on the back of his neck. The taste of alcohol was so incredibly strong on Alec's tongue when he pried open Magnus lips, but Magnus couldn't bring himself to care – this was Alec, and he was kissing him. Right now. Alec pulled him back towards the couch, and sat down, bringing Magnus with him.

Alec gave a throaty moan as Magnus ran his tongue against the roof of his mouth. Magnus almost got drunk on nothing but Alec's sounds and he reached under Alec's shirt. He massaged his abs and started kissing down his jaws, and then down to his throat. Alec tilted his head backwards, allowing easier access to his throat as he gave another moan. Magnus start nibbling at Alec's skin, but stopped momentarily to pull Alec's shirt over his head and toss it on the ground. He took in the sight before him, grinned and moved back to kiss Alec's throat and started fiddling a bit with Alec's jeans. In the back of his mind, he noticed that Alec was wearing a pair of the pants he'd picked out for him.

Alec reached up to open Magnus jeans and shoved them down with the underwear. He didn't have the patience to wait, and he reached down to open his own jeans.

Magnus couldn't even pretend like he'd mind.

* * *

_**AN:**_

_**Uhm. Hi. Hello there. **_

_**So I updated. Basically because I got this review from** __Darkys** (I think that's what you called yourself anyway, feel free to correct me). Like, it was such a sweet review, and omg, I love you so much. So you got a mention here too! I really just wanted to cry when I read it, thank you so much. **_

_**But it got a little... yeah. At the end. I hope you don't mind. xD Please do tell me if you in the future would like me to not write this, because I don't think I'm very good at it. **_

_**But yeah. I hope you liked it. Review and tell me what you thought! **_

_**Azooak**_


	21. Chapter 19

When I woke up, the living room was dark. The only light here was the moonlight, shining in from the window. The next thing I noticed was an arm draped around my waist and my back against another person, the skin cool against my sweaty skin. I wasn't wearing anything but a blanket. I turned around to see Magnus, sleeping behind me on the couch, snoring almost soundlessly. My face blushed as red as a tomato. As I had turned, the first shot of pain came through my head, and I realized I had a bad headache. The next thing I noticed was that he was naked, too. I didn't know what I expected, but I was surprised nonetheless. I sat up, some of the blanket getting pulled off Magnus' legs and his arm falling down on the cushion. I put my face in my hands and rubbed my eyes.

"Oh God," I whispered, opening my eyes and looking around to find my clothes scattered around the living room floor. I sighed, too embarrassed to just lay back and not worry, but too tired to get up. Besides, I'd been comfortable next to Magnus. I figured I better go sleep in my bedroom and leave Magnus on the couch, and went to get up, but I felt a hand around my wrist and glanced back at Magnus.

"Come on, don't go. I was so comfortable," he said quietly, pulling a bit on my wrist. His voice still sounded way too tired for him to have been awake for very long. I smiled a bit. His eyes was half-closed, his hair messy. His make-up was smeared, but he didn't care. A small smile was playing at the corner of his lips and he was looking at me. I looked towards the guest room where Jem would be sleeping, worrying about him waking up and see us wrapped in each other's arms on the couch.

"I shouldn't stay. Besides, I've got my pillows and the duvet and everything in my bedroom," I said quietly, and yawned in the middle of the sentence. He smirked, and I already knew what he was thinking.

"Well, let's go to the bedroom, then."

He sat up and pushed the blanket off us, letting it fall to the floor. I blushed badly at being exposed in front of him, but didn't say anything. He leaned in to kiss me, and I let him, but I pulled away quickly. He smiled and took my hand.

"Come on, then."

He got up and pulled me up. I couldn't help but let my eyes wander down his body, but quickly looked back to his face to see him grinning at me. "Shut up," I said, and started to walk toward the bedroom. I pushed open the door and let go of his hand to get into bed. I felt Magnus lying down next to me, and turned towards him to let my head rest on his chest. Magnus put his arm around me, and I quickly drifted off back to sleep.

* * *

"Geez, I knew you were drunk, but I didn't think that's what you'd be doing."

Jem had walked into Alec's bedroom just a few hours later he and Magnus had gone in there. He'd gone to wake Alec up, and had been surprised to see Magnus there – obviously he hadn't expected him to be there. He'd let them sleep for a while, but had then gone to wake up Alec. Magnus was still sleeping in the bedroom. Alec glared at him while filling up a glass with water and finding two pills to make his head ache a bit less.

"Shut up."

"Someone's got a hangover."

"Someone's too cheery for his own good."

Jem laughed and took another sip of his coffee. He had been up for a while – he'd gone to bed very early. Alec swallowed the pills along with some of his water, and then sitting down on the opposite side on the kitchen table.

"Can we just not talk about this?"

Jem was about to answer when there was a noise from the bedroom. They heard the door opening and Magnus coming out to get his clothes – inconveniently in the living room – and he came into the kitchen. He looked at Alec and did one of those lopsided smirks Alec loved. It made his heart skip a beat. Then Magnus looked at Jem and raised an eyebrow questioningly. Alec supposed he hadn't told him he was there.

"Magnus, this is Jem, Jem, this is Magnus."

They just gave each other an approving nod before Magnus looked back to Alec. "I'm just going to grab some coffee real quick, I'm late for work." Alec nodded and went to poor him a cup of coffee from the pot Jem had already made. He handed him the cup, and Magnus downed it quickly. He looked at Alec as he went to put the cup in the sink.

"I've got to go, but I'll be back later, yeah?" he said and stepped close to Alec, standing not much more than a few inches from him. He leaned in to kiss him quickly, and Alec smiled when he pulled back.

"Yeah. When's that catwalk thing, by the way?"

Magnus smiled a bit, almost sadly, but he quickly covered it with a smirk. "It was yesterday. Don't worry about it, though. There's always the next."

Alec bit his lip and looked away for a minute before looking back. "I'm sorry, I forgot, Scott came over with some things yesterday, and I…"

"Alec, don't worry about it. I'll tell you about the next one."

"Are you sure, Magnus?"

"I'm sure. But I really have to go. I'll see you later, we'll talk about it then, okay?"

Alec nodded slowly and leaned in to kiss Magnus again. It was over way too quickly, but Magnus was in a hurry. He nodded at Jem again and left the apartment. Alec looked at Jem, who was smiling teasingly at him.

"Shut up, James."

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Hey guys! Update! It's amazingly fast, isn't it? Well, I love you guys. And you're really reviewing more than you used to. Thanks. Love ya. _**

**_Not a lot happened in this chapter, but it was really just.. somewhat the aftermath of the night before. So yeah. Hope you don't hate it. _**

**_Also, the fast updates are pretty much all thanks to Darkys. I'm not saying you guys are not important _**_all **of you are important to me, but omg, have you read the reviews. *cries with joy* So, here's a little message for her;**_

_Darkys: Hey girl. I love ya too, I mentioned that, right? Anyway, to answer your question.. I did actually want to call a guy once when I was drunk, but I was on Cuba, so it didn't happen, haha. I desperately tried to get internet connection though, so I could message him on facebook.. but the hotel was being bithces and didn't have internet open at 1 am... pffft..  
And I'm actually pretty sure my brother thinks I have mental issues too, so you're not alone.. I'm just glad you - and everyone else - actually like what I write. I've been really self conscious about my writing, but since I started putting it online, I haven't gotten a single negative review, and it really gives a confidence boost. **I LOVE ALL O' YA GUYS. **Also, you should make a user on here... That way we wouldn't have to talk like this, heh. _**  
**

_**But just guys, I love you all, every last one of you, and I talked to one of you last week who was going through some really terrible things (don't worry, I won't tell everyone what it is or who you are). And I just wanted you guys to know... Guys, if you ever want to talk to someone who doesn't know who you are, or someone who doesn't know what you've been through in life, you don't have to face everyday, anything. I'm here for you. Just message me. And even if you just want to talk about something random that doesn't have any kind of relevence to anything - MESSAGE ME. I'M HERE FOR YOU. EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU.**_

_**But anyways, guys, I hope you liked the chapter. Review and tell me what you think! (and holy shit, this AN got long, I'm sorry)**_

_**Azooak**_


	22. Chapter 20

The printer kept spitting out paper after paper after paper. Hundreds of words on every page, hundreds of pages from beginning to end. Alec had never been so nervous, and now he just wanted to hide under his bed and never know.

"Alec, relax. There's still a while 'til he gets here. You don't have to freak out about it yet."

Alec bit his lip and looked at Jem. His blue eyes were doubting, his lip red from biting. His blush was in place, a light pink tint on his pale complexion. "What if he doesn't like it? What if he thinks it's ridiculous? What if he laughs at me?"

"He won't laugh at you. He might not be the perfect gentleman, but he is not that much of a douche."

"But he might not like it, Jem."

"Well, he's not some book critic, Alec. Even if he doesn't like it there's still hope. Now, it won't be long till he gets here, so I'll leave. Give you two some space. And I imagine you'd want to talk to him about last night."

Jem was sitting on Alec's bed, looking at him the whole time they had been talking, while Alec had shifted from looking at Jem to look at the printer; the window; the ceiling; anywhere but at Jem. Jem's silver hair was ruffled, looking like he just got out of bed. There were a few black stripes in his hair, but the majority of it was silver like his eyes were. He was smiling reassuringly, trying to calm Alec down.

"But where are you going to go?"

"Don't worry about me, Alec. I'll go to a café or something, call my people in Milano and get some work done. I'm bringing my laptop so I'll be able to actually get something done. And, you know, if he likes it and you get a bit more confident, I know a few publishers. I'm sure they'd love to take a look."

"I know, Jem. I know you have connections. It's not necessary to bring them into it; this is nowhere near good enough to be published."

"I wouldn't be too sure of that. You've got a way with words. But I won't say anything, because just showing this to Magnus is a huge deal. I really think he'd be good for you –" he got up from the bed and started walking out the bedroom, "- but I'm leaving before you kill me for saying so."

Alec smiled hesitantly and looked back at the printer, which had now printed out several hundred pages and the very first page was lying on top with the title and Alec's name staring back at him. Soon enough he heard the door close before Jem, and he got up and picked up the pages from the printer's paper tray.

Not more than ten or fifteen minutes passed before the door opened. Alec was standing in the kitchen, and he'd left his book on the living room coffee table. He heard the shuffling of paper, and he knew Magnus had picked up the book, obviously intrigued on the stack of papers standing on the table. Alec's hand was shaking as he put the coffee cup in his hand on the kitchen table and he walked into the living room. Sure enough, Magnus was sitting in the couch with the stack of papers in his hands. He looked up as Alec stepped into the room, smiled and put the papers on the table in front of him as he got up and walked over to Alec.

"Hey," he said quietly, standing closer than Alec was used to. He leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on his lips, closing his eyes slowly, but pulling back when Alec didn't respond. He opened his eyes and looked at him. "Alec, are you okay?" he asked, as he took one of Alec's shaking hands.

Alec bit his lip, but intertwined his fingers with Magnus'. He looked down and took a shallow breath. "I'm just… nervous, I guess. Because of last night, and because of my book, and because of my feelings towards you and Scott and-"

"Alec, shut up. You don't need to be nervous. About the book, I get it, I do, but none of the other things are something worth getting worked up about. Let's talk, and I'll start the book later, alright?"

Alec looked back up into Magnus eyes, and stopped. Sometimes he'd forget just how gorgeous those eyes were, and he'd catch himself staring at him again. He blushed and nodded, following Magnus back to the couch and sitting down.

"I'm sorry I called you yesterday. With the catwalk thing yesterday and work today, you didn't need me to call you and screw up your schedule."

Magnus smirked slightly. "Actually, I'm quite happy you did. I was worried about you, and I'm not going to hide the fact that I'm crazy about you and I've wanted this for so long."

Alec looked down and his face turned the colour of a tomato, but he couldn't hide the smile playing at the corner of his lips – nor did he want to. "That's good, I suppose."

"Alec, you don't regret this, do you?"

Alec slowly shook his head, but didn't answer at first. He hadn't really thought about that – did he regret it? Was it too soon to sleep with Magnus? Should they have waited? Should they even have done it, at any point? "No, I… I don't regret it. I've wanted it too, I just… didn't think I'd be drunk the first time we did."

Magnus smirked and laughed. "I thought you'd said you don't like drinking? But anyway. I'm glad it happened, and that you don't regret it, even if you were drunk. It got me one step closer to having you to myself."

"Well, if you want me to yourself, maybe you shouldn't tell me how good-looking I am. I might decide I'm too hot for you."

Magnus laughed, happy to joke around with Alec the way they always did. He'd hoped it hadn't changed too much between them and made it awkward, and it didn't seem like it had. "Oh, darling, you may be hot, but no one is too hot for me. No one is _hotter _than me, either, not even you, _lover_."

Alec blushed at the new nickname, but he smiled nonetheless. He had let go of Magnus' hand when they sat down, but now he took it again, intertwining their fingers once again. Magnus smiled.

"Now, Alec, did you want to talk about your feelings, or do you want me to read your book?"

Alec glanced at the paper stack and let go of Magnus' hand. "Read. I'll go… make coffee, do you want coffee?"

"Hey, don't worry. Just go do something you want to do. Go buy yourself a new book to read, go to a café, anything you feel like. You don't _need _to be here while I read it, do you?"

"I can't go anywhere, Magnus…"

"Why not?"

"I quit my job yesterday when I was drunk; I… can't afford going anywhere. At all."

Magnus bit his lip hesitantly. "Oh. I guess you're kind of depending on this book, then?" he asked, and Alec nodded slightly and looked down. It hadn't been a good idea to quit his job, he knew that, but it just didn't give enough money for him to live off of.

"It was a stupid thing to do, but there's no way Luke is giving me back my job. So I'm going to have to find something new."

"You know that if you're in any kind of trouble, I'll help you. You know that, right? Even if you lose this place, you can come live with me. I don't mind."

Alec smiled. "I know. Just read. I'll go back to bed. You won't finish it today, but just… read. I still have a headache, so I just want to sleep."

Magnus nodded and Alec got up and went into the bedroom, throwing himself into the bed and pulling the duvet up around him. He closed his eyes and tried to sleep, but couldn't. What was he going to do about Scott now? And did this mean he and Magnus was in a relationship? That they were dating? Would he get over Scott with Magnus' help, or was he just making it harder on himself? What if the book wasn't good, what would he do then? What job would he be able to get? Even if Magnus thought the book was good, was that something he was just saying, or did he mean it? Even if he did mean it, would publishers agree with him?

Soon enough, though, he tried to empty his mind for thoughts and drifted off to sleep. He usually never dreamt, but tonight he did. He dreamt of Scott and Magnus and himself. He couldn't even forget in his sleep.

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Hey guys! Been a tough week, so I haven't had time to update before now, sorry about that. You got a long chapter though, so I hope it's okay! _**

**_Short message for Darkys: _**

_I don't have twitter, but I have tumblr. On there, I'm azooak as well, feel free to find me and message me on there. But I don't really use much social networks other than that. I mean, I HAVE twitter, but I haven't used it since I talked to Cassie Clare briefly a few weeks ago, and I didn't use it much before that, either, so. But whatever - I prefer tumblr, so hit me up on there. _

**_But yeah, I hope you enjoyed the chapter - reviews are what I live for! So review, guys! _**

**_Azooak_**


	23. Chapter 21

_The kisses trailed down his neck, leaving a burning trail of fire behind. Alec's shirt has been discarded earlier, which made it easier for Magnus to continue the trail of kisses onto his shoulder from his position behind Alec. Alec's hand was resting on Magnus' cheek, adding a light pressure to keep the kisses coming. A loud moan escaped Alec's lips, coming from the back of his throat. _

"_God, Magnus, don't stop."_

_Magnus nibbled lightly on his hot skin, still breathing heavily from the kisses they had shared only a few moments ago, but didn't moved further down due to the hand tracing fine patterns over Alec's chest. Magnus' own hands was resting on Alec's hips, fighting the urge to pull him away from the other person, on his knees like the others, positioned in front of Alec. The other person leaned closer to Alec, kissing him and quickly prying his lips open and let his tongue run along the roof of Alec's mouth. _

_Alec moaned again and buried his free hand in Scott's hair. His hand on Magnus' cheek added a bit more pressure and Magnus bit a little harder, sucking the skin lightly, leaving a red mark on Alec's neck and causing Alec to groan from the back of his throat. Scott's hand started trailing down Alec's chest, moved to his stomach, then slipping underneath the waistband of his black boxers. Magnus moved quickly, and the hand that had left Alec's chest was soon replaced by burning trails of lips. _

_Alec groaned again against Scott's lips as a finger lightly stroked his member, before a hand grabbed him firmly, driving him completely insane. Alec broke off the kiss and let his head fall backwards. His hard breathing was loud and almost the only thing audible in the room. Magnus sucked lightly on one of his nipples, and then moved over to the other one, beaming over the whimpers and moans escaping Alec as they continued to pleasure him. The hand holding onto him started moving, slowly at first and then picking up speed, making Alec breathe even harder than before. _

_Magnus lips moved close to Scott's arm as he pulled the boxer's down and continued the trail of kisses further down Alec's-_

* * *

Alec sat up straight before he was even really awake. The headache was still there, but he didn't even notice it. His mind was only on the dream he had just woken up from, the single dream he had remembered in years and one he was sure he wouldn't forget just any minute. As he let himself really wake up, and try to forget about the dream, he got out of bed. He could hear voices coming from the living room, so he quickly put on a clean pair of jogging pants and threw his t-shirt on the floor, and walked into the living room.

Magnus was sitting in the couch, more than half of the paper stack lying next to him and the remaining stack in his lap. Jem was sitting in one of the arm chairs, like he always did. He preferred the chairs over the couch for some reason that Alec would never understand. They both looked over as Alec stepped into the room, and Alec blushed, looking at Magnus.

"Slept well?" Jem asked and Alec forced himself to look away from Magnus.

"Yeah, I guess…" he blushed again, but decided to change the subject before any of them caught on. "Where did you go? Did you get some stuff done?"

"Yeah, I went to the café you told me about. I got the next few days' work done as well, so I can just relax with you the next couple of days."

Alec nodded, and looked back at Magnus. He bit his lip, wanting to ask if he liked the book, but not sure if he wanted to hear the answer. He was more nervous than he wanted to be about his writing, but he didn't know how to change it. Magnus smiled at him, picking up the stack from his lap and putting it on the table. He got up and walked closer to Alec and leaned in to kiss him. Thinking of his dream, Alec immediately pulled back, trying hard not to moan at the simple gesture of a kiss. Magnus looked a little hurt, but didn't say anything about it, taking his hand instead. Alec wanted to pull back from his hand as well, Magnus' fingers were like a burning fire against his skin, but he restrained himself and intertwined their fingers.

Magnus gave him a reassuring smile and stroked his hand with his thumb.

"Did you read all day?" Alec asked, looking into his yellow-green eyes and biting his lip again. He knew that Magnus had been reading all day, but he didn't know what else to say.

"Yeah, I did. It's-" Magnus started, but Alec cut him off before he got further.

"No, I don't want to hear it. I told you it wasn't good, and you're the one, who wanted to read it, and I don't need to hear how much you hate it, Magnus." Alec let go of his hand and walked into the kitchen. He found a glass and filled it with water, and drank it with two pills to make his headache go away. Magnus came into the kitchen and looked at him.

"Don't say anything, Magnus. I'm going to take a shower. Go talk to Jem again. You were doing fine before." He said and walked past Magnus out of the kitchen and into the bathroom to take his shower. He found a towel and turned on the water, getting in when it was still cold. He shivered at first, but then forced himself to relax as the cold water ran down his body, sobering him from his dream and Magnus. He ran his hand through his hair and let go of a breath he hadn't realized he'd held onto.

Soon enough he stepped out of the shower, drying himself off and pulling on a fresh pair of boxers and the jogging pants. He hadn't brought a new shirt, so he got out of the bathroom and walked straight to the bedroom. He chose an almost white pink t-shirt and pulled it on, and then walked back to the others. They had stopped talking, Magnus had returned to reading and Jem was sitting with his laptop on his lap – knowing him, he was probably working. Only Magnus looked up, offering him a nod of acknowledgement before he returned to reading. Alec awkwardly scratched his arm, looking anywhere but at Magnus, trying to come up with something to say or something he could do without bothering the two of them.

He decided to walk over to Magnus and see what page he was on. Page 467. Really good for a couple hours reading. He didn't want to disturb either of them, so he went to get his jacket and shoes and walked out of the apartment without telling either of them where he went. It wasn't far anyway.

He walked down the street, eyes sticking to the ground so he was sure he wasn't going to look at anyone. He didn't need other people's attention, and he figured if he didn't look at them, they didn't look at him. As he walked up the stairs, he wondered if it was really a good idea. He decided it wasn't, but he wasn't going to stop now. Standing in front of the door, he knocked and waited a moment for it to be opened. When it was opened, what met him was the ruffled blonde hair, the blue eyes he knew so well was read and puffy from crying. He forced himself to smile, but he just looked at Alec, not moving or smiling. He was just looking at him. Alec bit his lip hesitantly.

"Hey Scott."

* * *

_**AN:**_

_**Hey guys! Update for you! **_

_**I don't really have a lot to say. The beginning got a little... yeah, I'm just going to keep quiet. **_

_**BUT OH WELL. Did you like it? Do you want me to stop doing this, or bring in more? Because damn, guys, your word is my law (is that even a saying in English, or do we just do this in Danish, I don't even know). I LOVE YOU, YENNO?**_

_**But, review and tell me what you thought, guys. **_

_**Azooak**_


	24. Chapter 22

Scott was quiet at first, and didn't move. Just kept staring at Alec like he didn't believe he was real, standing in front of his door. Alec bit his lip, but tried to keep the forced smile on his face for a bit longer.

"Can I come in, Scott?"

Scott nodded slowly and stepped back, opening the door more and allowing Alec to step inside. Alec immediately went to the living room and sat in the couch, fiddling nervously with the hem of his shirt. Scott closed the door and followed him, sitting in the chair the farthest away from him. Alec bit his lip.

"We need to talk."

Scott nodded again and looked down. "I know."

"How are you holding up? Are you doing okay?"

"What you do think, Alec?"

Alec looked down, nodding slowly. There was a short silence between them, before Alec spoke. "I miss you, Scott."

Scott took in a huge breath and got up from the chair. He walked into the kitchen and sat down at the kitchen table, hiding his face in his hands and resting his elbows on the table. Alec sat behind for a moment, not sure if he should follow, but he eventually got up and walked into the kitchen and looked at Scott. He leaned against the door frame and sighed.

"What do you want me to say? That I'm over you just like that? Magnus might be here, and I am completely head over heels, but I… I just miss everything we had."

"Like what? What did you have with me that he doesn't give you?"

"Scott… don't make me compare you two…"

"Come on. I want to know."

Alec bit his lip hesitantly – he did that a lot these days. "Well, he… you… Scott, you were my first, at everything, and no one will ever replace that, you know that, right?" He waited for Scott to give a slight nod. "But he… Everything about him is just so exciting. Like the way he dresses draws you in. And he's so blunt with everything, like he doesn't care what other people thinks. You were always so cautious when we were around other people. Sometimes like you were ashamed of me, and it just… really tore up my confidence. It wasn't the best before, but you just continued cutting into it every time you didn't take my hand or kiss me goodbye because other people were around us. He makes me feel like I deserve others attention, and shouldn't worry about people around me. Or he tries to make me realize all that, at least, he really does. And he's just one of those people you automatically trust, you know? I even showed him my book…" he added as an afterthought.

Scott looked up at him. "Your book? What – you mean, you showed him your writing? Alec, you haven't even known him for that long! You never showed me!"

Alec sighed. "Maybe this was a bad idea. I just wanted you to know that… I'm sorry for all of this, because I honestly never meant for this to happen. I love you, and I always will, but Magnus just came here and I tried so hard to say no, but I couldn't help falling for him. He's everything I never thought I wanted, but maybe that's because he's so different from me, and you too, for that matter. But you know they say opposites attract…. But really Scott, I didn't mean to break your heart, because I know I did, and I think I broke my own too, somewhere along the way. You have no idea how hard it was to say no to him before, but I didn't want to cheat on you. But I drove you away, and I never meant for that to happen. Please know that."

Alec stopped when he realized he was rambling and stood again, no longer leaning on the door frame, and looked at Scott. Scott was still looking at him, and he hadn't moved since Alec started his rambling. "But you didn't do anything to stop it…"

"I did everything to stop it, Scott. I tried avoiding him, I didn't answer his calls, I didn't open when he knocked on the door. But it didn't matter to him, because – _god, _he is so god damn stubborn."

"Another thing that's good on him, not me, I'm guessing."

"Scott, stop it…"

"Have you slept with him yet?"

Alec suddenly blushed and looked away, biting his lip. "I-"

"You have. How long did it take you after we broke up? Two days?"

"I didn't sleep with him until last night!"

Scott looked like he didn't believe him. It was obvious Scott was forcing his expression to soften, but he wasn't at all unaffected by it. "Really?"

"Really. And I… I dreamt of you today. That's why I decided to come."

Scott raised an eyebrow, and tried to hide a small smile at his lips."What did you dream?"

"Uh…" Alec blushed to the colour of a tomato, still not looking at him. "That doesn't matter."

"Oh, it was one of _those _dreams?"

"I'm leaving." Alec said and turned around, walked towards the door, but was stopped right before he reached it by a hand on his shoulder. He was turned around to look at Scott, who had a lopsided grin on his face that almost looked out of place. Scott pushed him up again the door, leaning in to kiss his neck. Alec was completely frozen in shock and didn't do anything. Scott kissed his neck softly, and then moving to suck lightly on the flesh just beneath Alec's ear, that special place he knew drove him absolutely crazy. And sure enough, a low moan escaped Alec's lips. Alec placed his hand on Scott's chest and started pushing lightly, but stopped abruptly as Scott pushed his hand down the front of Alec's trousers, and then below the waistband of his black boxers.

"Was this what we did in your dream?" he whispered huskily in Alec's ear, just as Alec let a soft groan slip from the back of his throat. Alec's eyes were already closing and his hand was no longer pushing at Scott's shirt, it was grabbing his shirt, trying to pull him impossibly closer.

"God, Alec. I'd almost forgotten how amazing the sounds you make are," he said in a low, still husky, voice. With that Alec realized he should be doing this. This was _Scott_, yes, the Scott he knew and who knew his body and everything he liked and disliked, but they _weren't together anymore_. Alec flattened his hand on Scott's chest, pushing him away softly, just enough for him to stop sucking on his skin and his hand being forced out of Alec's trousers.

"Scott, stop," Alec said, forcing himself to not jump right back at Scott when he looked at him. Scott's eyes were darker than usually, showing off his desire. His t-shirt was ruffled at the chest where Alec had put in it. "We're not together anymore. We can't do this."

Scott nodded, but didn't look like he fully understood what Alec was saying. Before he could say anything to clarify whether he understood or not, Alec spun around, opening the door and going fast down the stairs. He went straight home, walking in through the door to see Magnus and Jem the exact same way he left them – except that Magnus was now lying down and reading instead of sitting up. They both looked up. Magnus was the first one to speak with a worried expression on his face.

"Where did you go?"

"Out."

"Yes, I noticed that, but where? I was worried."

"Just out, Mags. Just read, okay?"

"Okay, whatever you say, _lover_."

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Hey guys! Another chapter! Didn't I update like, yesterday? I think I did... OH WELL. _**

**_You're getting another one, because I'm never sure when I'll have inspiration, and now I just had it, so HERE._**

**_But, I hope you liked it and I hope you don't hate Scott too much yet - because he will still be in a few of the future chapters. Oh, and you guys know what I just realised? I have NO idea when or where this is gonna end. So it might be ten chapters more, it might be 30. I don't know. Are you getting sick of it? Should I finish it off soon? _**

**_BUT. Review and tell me what you think! _**

**_Azooak_**


	25. Chapter 23

"Alexander, come on, we'll be late!"

Alec sighed, ruffling his hair again. He'd had Magnus pick out his outfit. Magnus didn't even offer to, it was Alec's idea – he cared about this. He knew he had to go, but he just wasn't happy about the way he looked. He didn't feel ready to go, and he sure as hell didn't feel ready to face everyone over there. He sighed again, ruffling it a last time before walking out to Magnus.

"You look great, Alexander. Stop fussing. It's not like you."

Alec blushed, but simply nodded. They walked out the door, leaving Jem to himself, and walking down to Magnus' car. Alec got in, yawning, while Magnus got in the driver's seat.

"You better not fall asleep over there. My confidence would be terribly damaged. Staying up all night was your own idea."

"I know, I know. I won't. I'm excited."

Magnus smirked and started his car. It didn't take more than a few minutes driving there, and before Alec was properly prepared the car came to a stop.

"Come on."

Alec looked over at him, biting his lip, but got out of the car. Before he knew it, Magnus was by his side, taking his hand and intertwining their fingers. He smiled reassuringly and started pulling him inside the building. It was a tall white building, mostly just looked like an office building. Alec was pulled into the lift and as soon as it closed, he was pushed up against the wars and suddenly lips were against his. He closed his eyes, leaning into Magnus and letting those burning hot lips and the tongue pry his lips open, before the lift stopped and he pushed him away, blushing.

Magnus smirked and took his hand, pulling him out of the lift and down a narrow hallway with white walls with occasional paintings and door after door. Alec couldn't even count how many they passed, when Magnus opened a door and pulled him inside. There were a bunch of people running around inside, mirrors along the walls with chairs standing in front. A few people sitting on the chairs and at last two people standing by each sitting person, shuffling with make-up and hair gel, straighteners, curlers and whatnot. Magnus let go of his hands and went over to one of the girls standing by an empty chair.

"Hey love, am I replaced yet?" He said and hugged her quickly. She smiled brightly – her hair was black and curly, framing her heart-shaped face in a lovely way.

"Not just yet, we can get you ready on time. We're in a hurry though, so get your ass in the chair, I'll find Jessie and she'll do your make-up."

Magnus smiled and sat down, glancing at Alec and called him over. "They don't mind you being here, just try not to stand too close and get in the way, okay?"

Alec smiled nervously, nodded and glancing around the room. "I didn't know it was going to be this chaotic."

"Oh, it always is at these things. A real bother, but what are you gonna do, you know? I love every bit of it. Feels like getting spoiled every time they do your hair and make-up. Makes you feel like a queen," Magnus said and starting picking a bit at his hair, sorting out a single knot he found. Alec would never have seen it – he didn't exactly have the eye for hair. Or make-up. Or clothes. Or anything. Man, he was a horrible gay guy. "They're coming back now, darling. It'll be a real chaos from now, so if you want you can go find a seat. You can stay here if you want, but we probably won't be able to talk until afterwards."

Alec nodded slowly, backing off to go find a seat, when he realized something. He looked back at Magnus. "Magnus, where-"

He was cut off when the two women came rushing over, make-up and hair-articles in hands, ready to make Magnus look as dashing as ever. It was a show, after all. Alec was just glad it wasn't underwear this time. He wouldn't be able to handle that. Especially not since that night a few weeks ago.

He found an empty seat towards the back of the make-up/hair room and sat down, watching Magnus cheerily chit-chatting with the two women – one of them was named Jessie, and that's about everything Alec knew about them. Jessie was a small woman, but beautiful nonetheless. Blonde hair with beautiful curls like the other woman. She had porcelain skin and she was in good shape – that much was obvious, even though the muscles didn't exactly spring out in your eyes when you looked at her. Alec found himself wondering why she was a make-up artist and not one of the models.

Soon enough Magnus' hair and make-up were done, and he needed to get to the wardrobe. He quickly walked down to Alec, took his hand and dragged him out of the room and into another room just two doors down the hall. This room was even more chaotic. There were clothes racks all over the place, people was racing around trying to get ready and they were running around each other, the models trying not to ruin their hair or make-up as they got dressed. Magnus looked at him.

"Okay, we definitely won't have time to talk now. That door there," – he pointed at a door down a few stairs – "will get you out right beside the catwalk. There's a front row seat reserved for you, so you don't need to worry about finding a seat. The show will start in a couple minutes, okay baby? Enjoy."

Magnus let go of his hand and ran into the chaos, trying to find his outfit and accessories and all that. Alec went over to the steps, there were only five, and he went to open the door. It was a room completely full of people on both sides of the catwalk, most of them looking like they were bored half to death. Maybe they were. Alec walked out and made sure to close the door behind him, hearing the automatic lock click. He walked along the front row, looking at the signs in the few still empty seats. It didn't take long to find his own name – his seat was around the middle on the long side of the catwalk. He sat down, a bit impatient. He vaguely remembered Magnus telling him who the designer was, but he couldn't for the life of him recall the name. He'd just have to wait and see.

* * *

Alec had to push himself through a lot of people to get to the back of the catwalk again. The designer's name was Seth-something, and he was there talking to Magnus. Alec walked towards them, and as soon as Magnus saw him, he smiled brightly and waved him over.

"Seth, this is Alexander. Alexander, this is Seth Aaron Henderson."

Seth took Alec's hand and smiled. "Just call me Seth or Seth Aaron though."

Seth was a tall man with black hair. He had a tan and a white toothy smile.

Alec nodded and smiled a bit. "Just Alec is fine. Magnus refuses to call me anything but Alexander though."

Seth nodded. "So you don't look like you're the person who'd go to runway-shows. Only here for Magnus' sake, I'm guessing?"

"Yeah… But I actually liked a lot of the clothes. Not typical fashion."

"That's good to hear, but I think Magnus and I better get out to the cameras. You coming, Magnus?"

"I'll just talk to Alexander for two minutes, I'll be right out."

Seth nodded and started walking out towards the gathering of models and other designers, paparazzo's and fashion photographers. Magnus turned towards Alec and smiled.

"So you liked it?"

Alec smiled and nodded. "I did. As I said, it's not the typical fashion. There's some edge over it, you know?"

Magnus took his hand, intertwining their fingers and started walking towards all the others, but Alec held him back. "We need to talk, Magnus," he said and bit his lip hesitantly. Magnus looked at him, not really happy anymore.

"Talk about what?"

"Uh…. Us."

_Oh god, don't break up with me yet, we've just started, _was Magnus' first thought. Isn't that the typical break-up line? 'We need to talk'. Magnus always used it himself. But he couldn't give up Alec, he wouldn't. "Did I… Did I do something? Alec, please don't do this, I've only had you for two weeks, I can't let you go!"

"What? No!" Alec looked like he'd just told him he had a third nipple on his leg. "I just wanted to ask you something."

That seemingly calmed Magnus down a bit and he tried to relax a bit. "Okay…"

"What… are we? I mean, I know we've kissed and all that lately, but we haven't talked about it, so…"

"Are you serious? This is what you wanted to ask? Thank God."

Alec couldn't help but smile a bit at the sigh of relief. "Yeah."

"Well, Alexander, dear. What do you want us to be?"

Alec blushed and looked down at their hands. "Together."

He missed the smile at Magnus lips, but he looked up when the voice was so happy. "Well then. Would you like to be my boyfriend, officially?"

Alec smiled. "I think I'd like that."

Magnus smiled wickedly and kissed him quickly before dragging him over to the chaos they'd both forgotten for a few moments.

* * *

_**AN: **_

_**Hey guuuuys. Sorry for the late update, last week was a bit... stressful. I'd hope to update during the weekend, but there were homework, essays, family trips... So yeah. **_

_**But I hope you don't hate me too much. I'm glad you guys aren't sick of the story yet. I'll just keep it going until it feels right to end it, then. Let me know if you get sick of it though, okay? **_

_**Also. On the last chapter. Holy shit, guys. Six reviews **OVERNIGHT**. LIKE HOLY FUCKING SHIT GUYS. I LOVE YOU. Keep it going, okay? **_

_**I love yoooouuu. **_

_**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. **_

_**Azooak**_


	26. Chapter 24

When they got back to the Alec's apartment, the door was unlocked. Alec was walking first, and he glanced back at Magnus. "Did you remember to lock the door when we left?"

Magnus raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, pretty sure I did. Why? Isn't it locked?"

Alec shook his head, opening the door and poking his head inside to look around. His eyes caught movement through the first door opening. He stepped back out, looking at Magnus. "There's someone in the dining room, Mags." His voice was a bit hesitant.

Magnus stepped in front of him, opening the door and walking straight into the dining room. Alec's eyes widened and he followed Magnus quickly, trying to stop him before he actually got to the dining room. Magnus managed to get into the dining room right before Alec reached him. Alec looked past him and saw-

"We come to visit and you're not even here? That's a great way to show your love for your family, Alec."

Alec smiled and walked past Magnus and walked over to him, hugging him tightly. "You're back!"

"Only for a few days, though. I'm staying with Izzy, and I thought I'd come say hi."

"So where are you going next time?"

"Probably the US. We talked about L.A. We'll see. But who's this?"

Alec glanced back at Magnus, and had momentarily forgotten he was even there. He smiled nervously. "Magnus, this is Jace, my brother. And Jace, this is Magnus, my, uh… my boyfriend."

"What? You guys got together? You didn't tell me that!"

Isabelle came into the living room from the kitchen. She was carrying a pack of cookies that Alec had had in the kitchen cupboard.

"It wasn't until a few hours ago, when were you expecting me to tell you? And why are you stealing my food?"

"You weren't here, and we were hungry!"

"You mean you were hungry. Jace doesn't eat stuff like this more than maybe once a year, and that's on Christmas."

Isabelle rolled her eyes and sat down by the dining table, opening the pack of cookies and pulling one out. She took a bite. "Where were you guys anyway?"

"We were at one of my runway shows. Alec actually liked it."

Isabelle stared for a moment. "You _liked _a fashion show?"

"It wasn't a regular fashion show! And the designer was nice."

"_You met the designer?_ Who was it?"

"Uh... Seth something."

"Seth Aaron Henderson."

"Oh, go figure. Of course that's the kind of fashion show you'll like."

Jace sat down next to Isabelle and took his phone from his pocket. "We actually came to talk to you, Alec." He looked back up at Alec. "Mom asked about you."

Alec's smile quickly fell and he bit his lip. He looked at Magnus before looking at Jace again. "What does she want?"

"She asked how you were. Where you live now. And she asked if you'd want to come with us to a dinner at some fancy restaurant. I guess you can bring … Magnus, was it? … since I'm bringing Clary and Izzy is bringing that guy."

"His name is Simon, Jace."

"Whatever. What do you say, Alec? Give it a shot?"

Alec bit his lip and looked down. "I don't know."

"Well, if you want to, give me a call. It'll be the day after tomorrow if we're going. The day before I leave again."

Alec nodded a bit. Jace and Isabelle got up from the chairs – it was pretty obvious he needed to think, and with them around that wouldn't happen. They left after saying their goodbyes, and Alec walked directly in to the bedroom, almost throwing himself on the bed. Magnus followed him and sat down on the bed, next to Alec. Alec had already told him what happened when he told his parents he was gay, so Magnus knew exactly why this hurt so much.

"Alec, listen to me, honey. You don't have to go if you don't want to. No one would blame you, okay? If you want to go, I'll go with you, and if you don't, that's fine too. This is _not_ something you have to do." There was a short silence. "Baby, say something."

"Does she think it's all okay because she wants to have dinner with me? They _threw me out of the house_, that's not something you can fix that easily. Oh Magnus, what am I going to do?"

"You're going to think about it, and then you're going to decide if you're willing to give her a chance."

"Maybe we should go. I mean, how bad can it be?"

"Think about it for a bit, Alec. You don't want to jump into it if you haven't thought about it."

Magnus got down next to Alec and looked at him. Alec put his head on Magnus' chest and his arm over him. Magnus rested his arm around Alec's shoulders and held him tightly. He could hear Alec starting to cry, but didn't know what to do. He kissed his forehead.

"Will you sing to me, Magnus?"

"What do you want me to sing?"

"I don't care."

Magnus lay quietly for a while, staring up at the ceiling and trying to find out what he should sing. Then he smiled a bit, and started singing in a low voice. His voice was a bit rough, but Alec didn't mind.

"_What happened to your life  
It's more than makeup staining your eyes  
You wanna be in a better place  
Say you don't wanna live this way  
All alone_

When your heart is cold  
And when you feel you're letting go  
You can rise above the world below  
Rise tonight, tonight

So hard to watch you bleed  
Your fragile heart ripped at the seams  
You gotta try to help me understand  
But first you're gonna have to let me in  
No, you're not alone

When your heart is cold  
And when you feel you're letting go  
You can rise above the world below  
Rise tonight  
You can rise tonight, yeah

There's a light, a hope in your eyes  
Like a star burning in the sky  
There's a fire you can't hide tonight, oh.

_When your heart is cold  
And when you feel you're letting go  
You can rise above the world below  
You can rise above the world below  
Rise tonight  
You can rise tonight." _

There was a comfortable silence between them for a few minutes after Magnus finished the song. Alec was silently sobbing and Magnus had closed his eyes while singing.

"You have such a nice voice, Maggie."

Magnus opened his eyes, smiled and looked down at Alec. "Maggie?"

"Don't you like it?"

Magnus smiled and gave him a gentle squeeze. He kissed his forehead again and looked back up to the ceiling. He closed his eyes.

"It's perfect."

* * *

_**AN: **_

_**Hi guys! New chapter! Woo! **_

_**A few things: **_

_**1. The song Magnus sings is Rise by Colton Dixon. NOT MINE.  
2. (something I forgot to mention in the last chapter) Seth Aaron Hendersen is a **real **designer, and my favourite designer. He is not my character, either. **_

_**But yeah. We got to see Jace this chapter! I don't actually like Jace that much, so I don't think I'll have him in the story much. Just the necessary amount of Jace. This is TMI afterall. And I hate Clary, but yeah, she'll be there too. **_

_**But I think that's pretty much what I needed to say for this chapter... Hope you liked it! **_

_**Azooak**_


	27. Chapter 25

"I just don't see why I can't meet him! You met my mother, and that wasn't exactly a success, now was it? So why can't I meet him?"

Magnus was standing by the kitchen counter, pouring boiling water into two cups with a tea leaf in each. Once he'd poured the water in, he put a teaspoon honey in each and walked over to the kitchen table where Alec was sitting. He sighed and sat down across from Alec.

"You wouldn't want to meet him, Alexander! He's not a good man, not only in the way he's not accepting homosexuality. I mean it, Alec."

"Why don't you ever talk about your past? I don't know anything about you from _before _we met! About your family! Your friends!"

"You have no use of my past."

"Oh, so I can't know? We're dating now, aren't you supposed to trust me?!"

"I do trust you!"

Alec got up and starting pacing back and forth in the room. His whole body was tense and he was looking anywhere else but Magnus.

"You sure have a fun way of showing it!"

"Well, what do you want to know then?"

"How do you know Scott? You never told me that."

Magnus paused and hesitated shortly. He hadn't expected that question. He looked down into his cup of tea. "Do you really want to know that?"

Alec nodded.

"I met him about 8 years ago. He was the first person I fell in love with. Eventually we… got together. I was so happy with him. But I wasn't enough for him, that much was obvious. He wasn't happy with me. And after a while, I… I ended up cheating on him, with his best friend and ex boyfriend. I broke the guy's heart. And my own." Magnus glanced up at him. "Are you happy now? Is that what you wanted to hear? God, Alec, sometimes you can be so … insensitive. So mean, you know that?" Magnus wiped away a tear that had run down his cheek and got up. "Leave it." He walked out the room and into the bedroom. Jem had left the day before, but the guest room was still _Jem's _to Magnus.

Just as Alec was about to go after him and sort it out, the lights in his flat went out. He sighed heavily, made his way to the bedroom and looked at the silhouette on the bed. "I'm going to check it out. The cupboard with the fuses and stuff is out by the stairs, by the top flat. It won't be long, I guess." Then he left the bedroom and out to the stairs, walking up to the cupboard. Only, when he got there, there was already someone standing there.

"How's it looking? Nothing too serious, I hope?"

The guy looked at Alec. They couldn't see much of each other – just the silhouette. Alec didn't recognize him by that, so he had no idea who he was talking to. The guy turned and looked back into the cupboard.

"Nah, it should be pretty easy to fix. Just flip this switch, push this button, and back to the switch, and …. Voila!" he said as the lights switched back on and finally Alec could get a good look at him. He had green hair and he was kind of pale. He wasn't exactly tall, but not short either. And the lop-sided grin seemed to be in a permanent state on his face. It fell a bit when he looked at Alec and saw his tears, though.

"I don't think I've seen you before... What flat are you?"

"Oh, I don't live here. I was on my way to see someone when the lights went out, and I figured I'd take a look. But what's wrong with you? You don't look too happy."

Alec forced a small smile on his face. "It's nothing. I had a fight with my boyfriend. He's in my flat right now, but I had to go check this out so… here I am."

"Here you are. What flat is that?"

"D5, why?"

"So your boyfriend is Magnus Bane, I take it? And that must mean you're Alec Lightwood?"

"How do you know that?"

"I'm sorry, let me introduce myself. My name is Ragnor Fell; I'm one of Magnus' friends."

"His friend? Well, maybe you can talk him into some sense, then."

"What'd he do now? What's he gotten himself into?"

Alec started explaining things while they walked down the stairs. "Well… Years ago, my parents threw me out of the house, because I'm gay. I just told them, and the first thing they told me was to get out of their house. I've only seen them once or twice since then. A few days ago, my mother asked my brother about me and asked if he thought I'd be up for dinner with her, my brother, my sister and partners, and Magnus too. So we went today, and it was just… a disaster. I didn't want him meeting my mother the first time to be like that. But that's beside the point. When we got back, we starting talking, and I asked if I could meet his parents… He said no to me meeting his dad, and his mom is dead, so… And I started nagging him about never talking about the past. And I found out that he used to date the boyfriend I left to be with him, and he called me mean, and…"

"Wait; hold on, he actually told you that?"

"Yeah, why?"

Ragnor opened the door to Alec's flat and they stepped inside as he answered. "He must be damn crazy about you," he said with a grin. The next thing Alec knew, Magnus stepped out of the bedroom and had crossed the space between them and captured Alec's lips in a kiss. It was like he hadn't even seen Ragnor. He just pulled Alec closer against him, wrapping his arms around him. Eventually he broke off the kiss, but his lips still _just _touching Alec's. Another moment and he pulled farther back and looked Alec in the eyes.

"Please don't hate me, I'm so sorry, darling, please, _please,_ don't hate me-"

"What are you going on about? Of course I don't hate you, Magnus, I'm just… upset. Now, why didn't you tell me Ragnor was coming?"

Magnus looked at Ragnor and smiled. Then he looked back at Alec and let his arms fall back to his sides. "He just comes around whenever he feels like it. He has an amazing ability to track down people, home or not."

Alec nodded and sighed. He looked at Ragnor. "Well, if you want you can have the guest room. I don't' care," he said and walked into the bedroom. He sat by his desk, resting his elbows on the desk and hiding his face in his hands. He sighed. After a minute or two, Magnus came in and sat on the bed.

"You know how much I care about you, right?"

"Don't be silly, Magnus. You don't care about me that much. We've been together for two days."

"I've been crazy about you since the first day we met, Alec. And God, your eyes… I could stare into those eyes for hours. I could kiss every centimeter of your gorgeous body. Listen to every little sound you make. Listen to you talk for hours. Watch you sit and read or write for hours. Alexander, it's everything you do. Every teeny tiny little thing about you drives me crazy, because all I want to do is stare at you, listen to you, hold you, touch you. I want to do anything I can to make you happy, to see you smile. I'm falling for you, so fast, and it scares the shit out of me, Alexander. I'm not used to feeling like this! I'm not used to being willing to do _anything _for someone I've only known a few months. I think I might l-"

"Don't say it, Magnus. Don't say you love me. That's too much, it's been too days, and Magnus, I… oh God. No one's ever talked about me like that before."

"People should tell you things like this on a daily basis."

"People don't care about me enough to tell me things like that daily."

"Alec, I told you, I don't just _care about you_, I _love _you!"

Alec closed his eyes when he said the word 'love'. He didn't know if he could take it that far yet. He knew he loved Magnus. He'd known for a while now. But he couldn't say it. Not yet. He was still trying to cope without Scott. Instead, he said, "I'm so lucky to have you, Mags." There was a short silence as Magnus worked out what to say. He hadn't expected Alec to say I love you back, but it still stung a bit. He got up and walked over to him, resting a hand on Alec's shoulder.

"Not even half as lucky as I am to have you, lover. Come in to the living room if you want to, yeah? I'll go talk to Ragnor."

He got up and left the bedroom, leaving Alec alone with his thoughts.

* * *

**_AN: Hey guys! _**

**_Updateee! Wooot! _**

**_Not much needs to be said for this chapter, other than I love you guys and enjoy!_**

**_Azooak_**


	28. Author's Note numero tres

**_Oh God, there's so many author's notes, I'm really, really sorry guys. _**

__But I felt like I needed to take a moment and tell you guys what's going on, because it's been a while since I update, and I probably won't have time or energy before after next week.

If you follow me on tumblr (I've recently changed my url to sparklesbeforeducks so if that person's showing up on your dash, that's me), you'll know that I've had a bad while lately. Like really bad. I don't remember telling you guys, but I have a depression and cutting issues and not quite an eating disorder anymore, but far from healthy food habits.  
And basically, it's been going really bad lately. I don't want to give you too many details on it, but selfharming, eating less and less and just... not feeling has been going on lately, and I'm sorry you have to put up with me like this.

And other than that, I've started working on an original story, which I hope will get published once I've finished it, so of course that takes a bunch of time, too.

Again, I'm sorry you have to put up with me.

I hope you guys are doing well and you don't mind this too much, because I really love you guys, I really, really do. So thanks for putting up with me, I guess, even though you don't have much choice.

I hope you're having a good day, or about to have one, or what do I know. Just be happy for me, okay? Since I can't be, I'd like to know you are.

**_Lea_**


	29. Chapter 26

"Are you kidding me right now?"

There was a laugh in the other end. "No, I'm not. Bring him here tomorrow and we'll take a look."

Magnus smiled wickedly and jumped up from his couch. He was home for once, but it had just been to bring a few things to Alec's place. His own flat was bigger, but he liked staying with Alec better. "Yeah, definitely. I'll see you tomorrow. I'll talk to him."

He hung up the phone and walked into his bedroom. He found a sports bag and started putting things in it – some of his clothes, some make-up, everything he needed.

He wasn't sure Alec would be happy about this, but no matter what, this was happening. He needed this.

* * *

"Alec? Where are you?" Magnus called out in the apartment. He'd just stepped in through the door, and dropping his bags on the floor, he went into the kitchen. Alec sometimes sat out there when he wasn't in the living room. Instead he found Ragnor sitting on the table top, looking out the window. "Where is he?"

"He left a while ago, almost right after you left. He got a phone call, and left immediately. Didn't even bother telling me."

Magnus sighed and walked back into the living room, sitting down on the couch, and pulled out his phone. He dialed Alec's number and waited a few moments for him to pick up.

"Magnus? Great, I'm on my way back, meet me by the car; we need to go right away."

Alec hung up without even waiting for an answer. Magnus got up, and almost walked out of the apartment without telling Ragnor. "I'm leaving again, Ragnor. I'll talk to you later." And then he walked out of the flat and down to the car, which was parked in front of the building. He leaned on the car and looked down the street, waiting for Alec to arrive.

It didn't take long for Alec to come walking down the street. "Come on, we need to go."

Magnus got in the car. "Where are we going?"

Alec got in on the passenger side and put on his seatbelt. "France. Paris, to be more precise."

"What? We can just go to Paris, Alec!"

"Why not?"

"Well, for one, it's one of the biggest fashion cities in the world, and I'm wearing sweats."

"I don't care, Magnus, we need to go."

"Alec, we've got a meeting tomorrow. We can't go."

Alec sighed and finally looked at him. "What are you talking about? We don't have a meeting."

"It was supposed to be a surprise, but I sent your book to Jem, and he read it. He liked it just as much as I did, and we sent it to a publisher. They liked it, Alec, and they want to publish it. Your book! Tomorrow, at noon, he wanted to meet with us."

There was a long silence as they just looked at each other. Alec didn't know what to say. They hadn't talked about his book for a long time, and now… "What do you mean they want to publish it?"

Magnus smiled and took his hand, intertwining their fingers. "Alec, Jem sent it to one of the guys he knows, and he took a look on it, and they really like it. You can be a published author, but that means we have to go to this meeting, okay? What do you need to go to Paris for anyway?"

Alec looked out the window and bit his lip. Magnus could see he was just about to cry, and he gave his hand a little squeeze. "The doctors say Max probably won't make it through the week, and I need to be there."

Magnus' brows furrowed. He hadn't heard about anyone named Max before. "Who's Max?"

"He's my little brother. He has cancer, and he… My dad has been with him in Paris for about a year now. They've got a really good healthcare there, so…"

"And now they're saying he won't make it?"

Alec nodded, but he didn't say anything. He just sat and looked out the window, and it was starting to rain outside the car. Alec looked at the raindrops running down the car window, catching other drops on the way. He was clearly torn.

"Okay, Alec, this is about your brother, and it's about your future. I understand that you need to be there for him, and I know you need to go to this meeting. So what about we go to this meeting tomorrow, spend today packing, getting airplane tickets, somewhere to stay, a car to use. And then right after the meeting tomorrow, we go to Paris. How does that sound?"

Alec nodded slowly. "Okay. But we leave as soon as we're finished with the meeting, okay? I need to be with Max."

"Of course. But promise me we can have a bit of time to just be a couple? It's Paris!"

Alec let himself smile a bit and he nodded. "A bit. But I want to spend most of the time by Max' side, okay?"

* * *

Alec's phone rang through the apartment. He'd left it on the coffee table in the living room, and gone to take a shower. Now he'd dried himself off and put on some clothes – an almost white t-shirt with a pink tint and a pair of black jeans. He walked into the living room and _almost _got to the phone before it stopped ringing. He took it and checked who'd called. Isabelle. He dialed the number and waited for her to answer the phone.

"Alec! When are you coming? We're about to board the plane!"

"Didn't Jace tell you? I'm coming tomorrow instead."

There was a moment of quiet before she said, "No, Jace _didn't tell me_." At the last half of the sentence, her voice became a little distant and he could hear a smacking sound, presumably Isabelle slapping Jace's shoulder or leg. "What's up, why aren't you coming now?"

"I, uh... I have this meeting tomorrow at noon."

"What meeting?"

"It's with a publisher. They want to publish my book, Izzy."

"What?! And you didn't tell me! Alec, this is huge!"

He smiled a bit. "I didn't know! Magnus and Jem sent it to the publisher and set up the meeting and everything. So it's tomorrow at noon. But hey, call me when you're there? And say hi to Max from me if he's awake."

"Yeah definitely. I'll call you in a couple hours when we're at the hospital."

"Great. I'll catch a plane as soon as the meeting is over. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye!"

Isabelle hung up. Alec sighed and put the phone back down on the table, sitting down in the couch. Magnus had dragged Ragnor out to get things for the Paris trip, so for now Alec was alone. He could do whatever he wanted to, but all he wanted to do was cry over Max and cuddle with Magnus. But he was alone for now.

* * *

_**AN: **_

_**Hey guys. So, finally got around to updating. I'm still really depressed though, and with holiday coming up, I'm actually leaving for this weekend, I still have work, two 1-week long vacations, where I won't be able to update, and I don't know if I can even will myself to update, considering I'm so depressed. I'm sorry about that.**_

_**But well, we got a bit of Max here. A result of my mood, sorry. Next chapter will probably be really sad and all, but I promise a complete fluff chapter in the Paris chapters. **_

_**But, I hope you like the chapter. Review and tell me. **_

_**Lea**_


	30. Chapter 27

"How long are we going to be there?" Magnus asked from the door way. He had been by Alec's computer, looking up hotels and plane tickets, so he obviously needed to know how long they would need to stay.

Alec looked up. He was in the bedroom, packing a suitcase for the trip. There was a bunch of his clothes scattered around on the floor in a huge mess around him, and he and the suitcase was the center of a circle. He sighed, shrugged and looked down again. "I don't know. How long can you get off work?"

"As long as you need me too. I just thought, we don't know when exactly he… And you won't be in the mood to travel after…" Magnus let his voice trail off and bit his lip. He kept his eyes on Alec.

"I don't know. A couple weeks, I suppose? Maybe three."

"Let's call it four then, shall we? It'll give you a bit of time afterwards, and it'll give _us_ a bit of time. Just to be together and be us."

Alec nodded and shut his eyes. His shoulders slumped down like all his energy just slipped out in that one sigh. "That'd be perfect." He was quiet for a bit. "I don't suppose you can actually get off work for a month, though."

"Hey, whatever you need me to. This is your little brother, I don't care about work. I really don't." Magnus walked over to him, trying not to step on any of the clothes, and sitting down next to Alec. He put a hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him a bit. "I just want to be there for you, whatever you need."

"Yeah?" Alec looked up at him, looked into his eyes. Magnus smiled reassuringly, but half-heartedly. Right now he'd do anything to make Alec feel just a bit better, to comfort him even the slightest.

"Yeah. So. Four weeks?"

Alec nodded, about to answer, but his phone rang. He started looking through the clothes right around him, where the ringing was coming from, and when he finally found it he _just _answered it in time. It was Isabelle, probably calling to say they arrived from the hospital, so he just answered it immediately.

"Hey Izzy, is he-"

"Why aren't you here? I m-miss you. Why aren't you here?" It wasn't Isabelle. No, that little, tiny voice, that was someone he hadn't spoken to for a very long time, and it was barely recognizable. It broke randomly in the middle of words; it was very weak and sounded like he was crying. No, this was Max, and he was _dying _and Alec wasn't there. It broke his heart.

"I-I miss you too, Maxie. I miss you a lot. I'll be there tomorrow, okay? I have a meeting I need to go to, and then I'll be there as soon as I can. How are you feeling?"

"It hurts all the time. Is it going to stop hurting?"

"Of course it will. Hey, your birthday was a few days ago, and I didn't get to ring you. I got you a present though. I'm sorry I didn't get to talk to you."

"When tomorrow?"

Alec closed his eyes quickly and bit his lip. "I don't know exactly. I'm probably leaving from here around 1 or 2 o'clock, we're ordering tickets now."

"Who's coming?"

"Oh, uh... I guess Izzy didn't tell you. Magnus is coming too. He's my boyfriend."

"Like Izzy has a boyfriend? Kissing and holding hands?"

Alec smiled. God, he was probably the best kid ever, and of course this was happening to _him_. "Yeah, just like that."

"Can boys have boyfriends too?"

"Yes, of course. Mum and dad don't like it, but we can."

"Why don't they like it?"

Alec sighed and looked at Magnus. "I don't know. There are not that many boys who want boyfriends. Not compared to the ones who want girlfriends, anyway. Maybe that's why. They're not used to it."

"Is he nice?"

"Who, Magnus? Yeah, he's amazing. I think you'll like him."

"I bet he's nice. Is he pretty, like Jace says his girlfriend is? She's not here yet."

"Oh, he's absolutely beautiful. But listen, Maxie, I gotta go. We're getting the tickets and we gotta pack and all, so I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay. Bye." Max hung up first and then Alec put the phone down in his lap. He hid his face in his hands and he let out a long sigh, before he quietly started sobbing. Magnus moved a bit closer, reached over and put his arms around him, pulling him into a hug.

"God, Maggie, why does this have to happen to _him_? He is the best little boy I've ever met, and he's so happy even with the cancer, and he's so scared of it all. He's so accepting, he's sweet, he's a little boy who loves to read, he loves his family and spending time with us, and this happens to him of all people. It's so unfair."

Magnus just stroked his hair softly and pulled him closer. "I know, baby, I know. It always happens to the good ones. But I'm here for you any time you need me to be. I'll talk to you, I'll just listen if that's what you want, and I'll do anything for you. I love you."

Alec nodded and kept sobbing and sobbing. They sat there for a solid fifteen minutes, just holding each other and Alec crying. Eventually he stopped crying, and he just sat there. Looking out into the air and not saying anything. Magnus pulled back and looked at him.

"I'll go and get our tickets, okay baby? And then I'll call work, get a month off for whatever cost it may have, and then we'll pack. We're going to talk over the meeting tomorrow, and get ready, so you can get your book published, and then we're going to leave. Alright?"

Magnus got up and walked out of the room after Alec nodded. He walked back into the living room to the computer, and to the phone, to get this all sorted out and to get ready to go to _Paris _with _his _Alec. That was all he wanted right now.

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Hey guys. Another update. It's pretty shitty, and short, but I just can't handle any more at the moment, sorry. This is what happens. _**

**_But yeah, we got a bit of Max, so that's good, I suppose. _**

**_Also, I need to ask, for later in the story. Lemon? Where are we on that? D'you guys want it or not? That's all up to you. _**

**_Actually it's like 2:50am and I should really go to bed, but I'm just not really tired, you know? Not at all. I don't really.. feel anything. I'm not tired, I'm not happy, not sad, not nothing, I can just stare into the air and nothing registers and my mind is just completely blank. _**

**_Sorry, I shouldn't put all this in here. Sorry. I'll see you around or something, message me if you feel like it, review if you want. _**

**_Love you._**

**_Lea_**


	31. Chapter 28

"So what are you hoping to accomplish with this book of yours, Mr. Lightwood?"

The publisher, Mr. James, and Magnus had arranged the meeting to be at a small café. It wasn't the one Alec used to go to; it was one at the outskirts of town. It had sofas against the walls, the kind that was shaped in a half circle around a round wooden table. Alec and Magnus were sitting on one side of the couch, and Mr. James was sitting opposite of them. Besides the sofa was their luggage, so they could leave right after the meeting.

"I don't know, I guess just… sharing what I write with people. I love writing, and living off of it has always been a dream of mine," Alec said and took a sip of his tea. Mr. James nodded.

"Well, as I told your friend, we'd like to publish it. We, of course, still have to correct it if there's any mistakes, and make copies, and all that of before we can actually start selling it, but it shouldn't take more than a few months to get it all set. Personally I think it'll sell pretty good, and we should be able to get a great profit from it."

Alec smiled and looked down into his tea as he nodded. He'd never expected to be a _published author_, and now that it was happening he could barely believe it. It was hard for him to actually realise that he was going to get his very first book published soon.

"Alright then," Mr. James said, smiling, "let's talk numbers, shall we?"

* * *

"I can't believe you couldn't get two seats next to each other, Magnus," Alec said as he pulled his sports bag, which he used for hand luggage, up onto his shoulder. They had been sitting in the airport for ten minutes, and Alec was already restless. He always got that way when he was going on a plane, and there were still two hours left before they could actually board the plane.

"Hey, it's amazing I could even get seats. Besides, your seat is right in front of mine, I think we'll be okay."

They got up from the chairs they had been sitting in and went over to the Starbucks on the other side of the room. They ordered quickly and waited for a few minutes before Magnus' coffee and Alec's hot chocolate was ready. Alec looked at it and sighed – it said Alex.

"I know, but I don't feel like spending this many hours on a plane next to some complete stranger I won't even say a word to. I want you next to me." He took a sip of his hot chocolate.

Magnus took his hand and pulled him closer. He leaned his forehead against Alec's and looked him in the eyes. Alec tried to pull back, uncomfortable with being affectionate in public, but Magnus held him close. "You'll be okay, darling. I'll be right behind you, okay?"

Alec sighed and nodded, looking down and thereby hiding his eyes from Magnus. Magnus hesitated for a moment, and then leaned in to capture Alec's lips in a chaste kiss. Alec pulled back almost immediately, staring at Magnus with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry," Magnus said quietly.

Alec shook his head and looked around, to see if anyone was looking at them, and saw a few glances in their direction. He blushed deep red and looked back at Magnus. "No, _I'm _sorry. I'm just not ready to kiss you in public, I'm really sorry, Mags.. Everyone's staring at us."

Magnus glanced around before looking at Alec again. "So? I don't care about them. I just care about you." He grinned. "No, scratch that. I love you, and you're the only one I care about."

Alec blushed, taking Magnus' hand. He intertwined their fingers and started dragging Magnus towards the gate. "Come on, let's just get to the gate."

Magnus frowned, but followed him. It had been a while now- a long while, in his opinion. And Alec still hadn't said I love you back. He was getting more and more scared, but he tried hard not to let it get on his nerves. He knew he'd said it fast, way too fast. But Alec was different, wasn't he? He didn't mind, did he?

* * *

They were standing in the plane, next to Alec's seat, and a man was already sitting in the one next to his seat. Magnus was the one going first of the two, because his seat was behind Alec's, but he had stopped next to Alec's seat instead of his own.

"Magnus, stop, it doesn't matter-"

"Come on; just let me give it a shot." Magnus leaned closer to the man so he would be able to hear him. "Excuse me, sir?" He waited for the man to look up at him, and then he smiled. "Would you mind sitting in the seat on the row behind this one? You see, my friend here, he's not too keen on flying, and he doesn't handle it very well, so I thought I'd sit next to him if you wouldn't mind."

The man sighed and gathered his few things. He'd been reading, so he put a book mark into his book and closed it and got up. Then he took his bag from under the seat and walked out between them. Magnus took a few steps further back, letting him get into the next two seat row. By the time he walked back, Alec had already settled in the window seat and he was looking out. Alec looked at Magnus and smiled.

"You're amazing, do you know that?"

Magnus smiled back at him and sat down. He took his hand and intertwined their fingers. "Anything for you." Alec just blushed and looked out again.

"We're on our way to Paris, Maggie."

"And I've never been more excited to go on a trip with anyone. If only the thing with Max wasn't the reason."

Alec nodded. "If only."

* * *

**_AN: _**

**_Woo, update. Sorry about the long wait, yadda yadda. You know what I've realised? That when it comes to Alec's dreams and all that, I'm making him a lot like myself. Woops. _**

**_Well, hope you liked it. _**

**_Review if you want. _**

**_Lea_**


	32. Chapter 29

Alec woke up with a start and sat up straight. He'd been slumping in the seat and when he tried looking at Magnus his neck hurt. He must've strained it in his sleep. Magnus was looking at him as he cracked his neck, and then Alec looked at him. "What?"

Magnus smiled and pointed out the window. "Take a look, darling." Alec looked out and couldn't help but smile. The window was a bit foggy, but not to the point where you couldn't see out. It was dark out, but they were flying close to Paris and the city was full of lights. It was beautiful. He looked back at Magnus and smiled.

"It means a lot to me you're coming with me, you know that, don't you?"

Magnus took his hand and leaned in to capture Alec's lips in a kiss. Alec hesitated at first, worried someone might see them, but forced himself to let it go and leaned closer to Magnus, deepening the kiss. Magnus pried his lips open with his tongue. Alec had been sleeping, so he knew he'd have a bad breath, but he didn't even care. This was the first time Alec was willing to kiss him around other people. Eventually they broke apart, and Magnus looked into Alec's eyes. They smiled.

"I'll do anything you need me to, baby. Welcome to Paris."

* * *

"Excuse me, could you tell me where Max Lightwood's room is?"

The lady behind the desk looked up at Alec. She was a fairly tall woman with an annoyed look on her face, like they had bothered her while she was doing something very important that she did not want to be interrupted with. Her brown hair was pulled back into a tight bun and she had a pair of reading glasses resting on her nose. She sighed and typed something on her computer.

"Room 23, it's on the first floor. The elevator is over there," she said and pointed at what were obviously elevators. Alec nodded and thanked her, and they walked over to the elevators, stepping inside the first one. It was pretty normal elevator, the walls on both sides looked like they were made from stainless steel, the buttons on the left wall, and the top half of the back wall was a big mirror. Alec leaned against the wall on the left as Magnus pushed the button labeled "1st floor". They stood in silence as the elevator moved to the 1st floor, and when they opened Alec barely waited for them to be open enough for him to slip through.

He didn't even knock on the door, just barged in, and stopped dead in his track. Magnus was right behind him, but stopped and looked into the room as well. Max was lying in the bed, either unconscious or simply asleep, Isabelle was sitting in a chair next to the bed, Jace was sitting in the window sill, Clary and Simon were both fast asleep in the spare bed in the bed next to Max's bed, curled up in each other's arms like they would be sometimes; they were best friends, and both Jace and Isabelle knew that and didn't mind, however the Lightwood parents were nowhere to be seen.

Isabelle looked up as he came in through the door, and she immediately got up and before Alec knew it she was hugging him tightly. He put his arms around her and held her close as she buried her face in his neck.

"How is he?"

She pulled back and looked at Max. "He's trying his best to be brave. He's been asleep for about an hour now. All of his energy is just drained and he's so tired all the time."

Alec nodded and kept his eyes on Max for a minute until he looked at Isabelle again. "Where are mom and dad?"

"They went to get something to eat in the cafeteria."

Alec nodded again and sat down in the chair Isabelle had just left. Magnus just stood next to the chair, leaning against the wall and not saying anything. Isabelle went out of the room after telling them she'd go get their parents. She returned soon after, her mother and father following her into the room with a cup of coffee in their hands.

"Alexander. What are you doing here?"

"Hello dad. I'm here to support my brother when he needs it."

Magnus looked at Robert Lightwood. He had a stern face and he looked rather irritated that Alec was there. It wasn't exactly the kind of father Magnus had hoped he was, but he couldn't say he was surprised. Both of the Lightwood parents merely sighed and sat down in the chairs on the other side of the bed.

None of them even looked at Magnus. Sure, he was obviously gay which they weren't happy about; he was wearing glitter and tight clothes. But that doesn't make it okay, not at all. And it bothered Alec to no end, so he got up, stood closer to Magnus, and kissed him. Magnus was shocked but didn't resist, he put his arms around Alec, pulled him closer and deepened the kiss. This time it was Alec who pried Magnus' lips apart and he even started biting at Magnus' bottom lip as he put his right hand on Magnus' hips and his left on his shoulder. Eventually he pulled back and looked at his parents.

"Oh yeah, dad, this is my boyfriend. And way to go mom, if you want to be a part of my life again maybe you should try actually recognizing him. He's not going anywhere."

Alec let go of Magnus and pulled away, then he turned and walked out of the room and into the elevator, Magnus right behind him. He just needed some air so he could actually handle all of this, everything, Max, his parents. Paris with Magnus.

"Alec, it doesn't matter. I don't care if they recognize me, even if they like me or not. I just care about you. Now, just, get some air, and let's go get something to eat, okay? You didn't eat anything at the café, or the airport, or the plane, and I'm worried about you. Let's just go out for a bit, go to a nice French restaurant. How does that sound?"

Alec nodded but didn't say anything. He leaned against Magnus, resting his head on his chest. "After that we could go back to the hotel to get some sleep or something. Max is asleep anyway, so…"

Magnus nodded and smiled. "Sounds great."

* * *

"Oh my God, Alec. Please don't stop."

Magnus moaned and dug his fingernails into Alec's shoulder. He was pinned against the wall, Alec kissing and biting his neck, and all he wanted to do was push Alec down onto the bed and ravish him and make him scream and moan until he forgot his name.

Alec reached down to Magnus pants, popping the button and pulling down the zipper, and then pushing the pants down along with Magnus' boxers. He stopped momentarily to pull off Magnus' and his own shirt and then got back to the neck biting and kissing. Magnus reached over to open Alec's pants and pushed them down as well. They both stepped out of their pants as Magnus pushed Alec backwards until he hit the bed.

Now Magnus started nibbling at Alec's neck, but didn't stay there for long. He started kissing and licking a trail down Alec's chest, and he put his hands on Alec's hips.

"Oh God, Magnus," Alec moaned and put his hand on Magnus' head, grabbing into his hair and pushing him further down. Magnus looked up for a moment with a smirk.

"Say my name again. That's sexy." And then he went back to kissing Alec's now lower stomach, and it wasn't long until he reached Alec's member. He first quickly kissed the head, then licked, before he put Alec's member in his mouth. "Magnus!" Alec almost screamed and closed his eyes as he groaned from the back of his throat.

* * *

**_AN: _****_Hey guys. Quick update, and rather long, isn't it? Oh yay. _**

**_Well, not a lot to say about this chapter. Except that I'm going to finish it off soon, it's about to reach the end of the rope, you know. _**

**_Review if you want. _**

**_Lea_**


End file.
